Men’s Divorce Podcast: How COVID-19 Impacts Child Custody

Men’s Divorce Podcast: How COVID-19 Impacts Child Custody

In the latest episode of the Men’s Divorce Podcast, Cordell & Cordell CEO Scott Trout and divorce attorney Charles Hatley discuss how the COVID-19 pandemic is impacting child custody issues.

Cordell & Cordell is currently hosting a series of free weekly webinars covering how the Coronavirus is affecting divorce cases. Men and fathers across the country are facing uncertainties like never before. To help answer some of the most frequently asked questions, Cordell & Cordell is producing a series of podcasts that take a deeper dive into some of the issues covered in the weekly webinars.

In this episode, Mr. Trout and Mr. Hatley look at how the pandemic is affecting a number of issues related to child custody such as how to arrange custody drop-offs when a shelter-in-place order is in effect.

Click the link below to listen to the full episode. Also make sure to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or whichever podcast app you prefer.

The post Men’s Divorce Podcast: How COVID-19 Impacts Child Custody appeared first on Dads Divorce.

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calm during covid19 crisis

How To Stay Centered And Calm During The Covid19 Crisis

calm during covid19 crisis

 

The recent outbreak of COVID-19, commonly known as “the coronavirus,” is changing things rapidly. Many people are adjusting to working from home unexpectedly. The virus is hitting some harder than others, with some people losing their income.

As you’re adjusting to this, it may feel like it’s turning your world upside down. You may be struggling to figure out new technology, adjusting to having kids running around, and overwhelmed by the news on social media.

While this feels confusing, scary, and overwhelming, it doesn’t need to be. I am a psychotherapist and coach who specializes in helping college students and young professionals overcome stress and anxiety so they can live better lives.

Helping people through stressful times is what I love doing most. With the proper mindset, you can stay calm and focused during this time.

12 Tips for Staying Centered And Calm During The Covid19 Crisis

1. Stay informed by consulting quality resources

Aim to get your information from quality sources like the CDC. Take the recommendations seriously, and then rest assured that you’re doing your part.

2. Practice mindfulness and breathe

When you notice your thoughts spiraling into worry about the future, even when you’ve done what you can, recognize that this won’t help the present. Notice your worry and bring your awareness back to the present moment. Take deep breaths into your belly. This helps calm your nervous system down.

3. Focus on what’s within your control

The events of the world are not within your personal control. You can, however, control how you manage your time, how you respond to stress, and how adaptive you are to changing times. This gives you a sense of hope and resiliency. Keep asking yourself: “what CAN I do?” After you’ve done what you can, let the rest go.

4. Limit news-checking

Keeping up with the news is helpful and necessary, to a point. But set some boundaries for yourself if you find you’re checking too much COVID-19 (Coronavirus) news and it’s stressing you out (for example, catching up 2 times a day instead of 10).

5. Become friends with change

Big changes such as working from home, homeschooling, or canceling social plans can feel overwhelming. Reduce overwhelm by taking things one step at a time. Reframe the change as an exciting and new challenge to overcome, and not an overwhelming one.

6. Rearrange your schedule

If you’re shifting to working from home, it might be tempting to sleep in, work late, or spend the middle of the day playing with your dog. But as someone who has worked from home, I know the importance of organization and self-discipline. Plan out your day in advance. Waking up at the same time and working set hours can keep you on track. Use apps like Google Calendar, Trello, and Asana to schedule your time and keep track of your to-dos.

7. Rethink your exercise routine

If you’re used to attending classes at the yoga studio or gym, you may feel like you “can’t exercise” if your favorite workout spot is closed. However, there are many options available from home or outside. Check to see if your favorite yoga instructors are offering online classes, pump up your bike tires, go on a walk, or learn how to use free weights at home. With creativity, you can stay fit and healthy (which is especially important while the virus is circulating).

8. Use any extra time to refocus and realign

Quarter 1 is almost over! Use any extra time you have to assess how the first quarter went. Make sure you’re on track with your resolutions, recommit to your goals, create new strategies, and optimize your workflow. The key here is to focus on what you CAN do, and not on what you can’t.

9. Journal about your emotions

It’s okay to be upset, afraid, or emotional about COVID-19 (Coronavirus) outbreak. Research has shown immensely positive benefits to journaling about your emotions. Sit down for 20-30 minutes and let it out on the page.

10. Try new activities

Now is the perfect time to pin new recipes to your pinboard, try out some DIY projects, read new books, or take online classes. You can also do some spring cleaning or post old clothing items online. If you see the change is exciting, you may actually be grateful for this time!

11. Be supportive and kind

Times like these can make us more selfish and scared, or they can make us feel more generous and kind. Many people are suffering economically. If you are one of the people who has been less financially impacted, consider supporting small businesses or economically disadvantaged families who have been hit hardest. Even if you can’t contribute financially, a kind word goes a long way.

12. Don’t be afraid to ask for help

If you’re still overwhelmed, seek the help of a coach who can help you manage your schedule and build resilience, or a qualified therapist who can help you manage intense feelings of anxiety, panic, and fear.

If you follow these 12 tips, you will feel more calm, focused, and aligned. With kindness, flexibility, and mindfulness, we can get through this!

 

The post How To Stay Centered And Calm During The Covid19 Crisis appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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Custody in a Time of Crisis: Custody and COVID-19

Custody in a Time of Crisis: Custody and COVID-19

When you’re a divorced parent, being separated from your child when your former spouse takes custody is difficult enough. But doing it during a pandemic can be downright unbearable.

The post Custody in a Time of Crisis: Custody and COVID-19 appeared first on Divorce Magazine.

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Coronavirus divorce webinar

Cordell & Cordell Continuing Weekly COVID-19 And Divorce Webinar Series

Coronavirus divorce webinar

Cordell & Cordell is hosting a free webinar series, titled “Can the Coronavirus Affect Custodial Rights? How Divorces And Parenting Time May Be Impacted” for individuals dealing with unprecedented issues involving the Coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic and their divorce or child custody situations.

The series will air at 1 p.m. CT, Thursdays and will feature Cordell & Cordell attorneys answering questions about how the Coronavirus is impacting family law issues. The firm’s first Coronavirus family law webinar aired Thursday, March 26 and is available here.

The first webinar covered a range of topics relevant to
divorced fathers, such as:

  • Practical tips to ensure the safety and
    well-being of your children.
  • Child custody issues such as how to arrange
    custody exchanges while quarantined.
  • The financial fallout of COVID-19 such as what
    to do if you can no longer afford alimony or child support.
  • How to proceed with your divorce if family
    courts are closed due to the virus

With the uncertainty caused by the Coronavirus pandemic, it is vital to stay informed and prepare as much as possible for what lies ahead. This weekly webinar series will ensure that you are educated and in position to make decisions to help protect yourself and your loved ones.

Fill out my Wufoo form!

The post Cordell & Cordell Continuing Weekly COVID-19 And Divorce Webinar Series appeared first on Dads Divorce.

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co-parenting during coronavirus

Co-Parenting During The Coronavirus Crisis

co-parenting during coronavirus

 

During this unprecedented time of the Coronavirus and quarantines, many co-parents are finding themselves in un-charted territory with regards to their parenting plan and whether and how they should carry it out.

Here are some helpful hints for co-parenting during the coronavirus crisis:

Be open, communicative, creative and flexible!

This is a time like no other, so we need to be open, we need to be flexible, and we need to get creative and think outside the box.

If you have a parenting plan that is requiring something that can’t be done (or can’t be done safely at this time, like air travel), get creative. But first, communicate!

Reach out to the other parent and brainstorm. Can the visit be delayed, or time added onto the next visit? Can you do virtual visits with Zoom, Facetime or Skype where the kids can eat a meal, play a game or just chat with the other parent?

If you have a parenting plan that can be carried out, but you question the safety, communicate your fears. Research suggests that the Coronavirus is not generally dangerous for children, but reach out to your pediatrician if you are unsure or if your child has immune compromising factors and then discuss with your parenting partner.

Once again, communicate, be flexible and get creative!

If it is not advised to make frequent visits, perhaps the visit duration is lengthened, and the frequency is lessened. Or maybe you do a mix of virtual and in person visits, or meet in a safe outdoor space to go hiking, play soccer or be in nature together.

Do not operate out of fear

There is a huge amount of panic and fear surrounding this situation, which is bringing up deeply buried fear from past circumstances and triggering internal and external defense mechanisms of all kinds. Notice the space you are operating and making decisions from. If you are operating out of fear, take a break to process your feelings before you move forward with decision making or discussing with your co-parent.

Take several deep breaths and re-center, releasing all of the fear you may have taken on from the media or others around you. Breathe through any personal fears that you have. Notice what fear or feelings are coming up for you that may not be related to the current issue. Be with all of your feelings and allow them to move through your body. Once you are more centered, make decisions from a grounded, clear space.

What can we do to help our children cope with missed visits?

Be honest with them about what is happening. Let them know that Mom or Dad really wants to see them, but it isn’t safe right now, so you will do whatever you can to find ways for them to connect (see above with virtual visits, outdoor meetups, etc.) and then do it.

Find ways for your child to connect with them even if they can’t connect in real life. You can help them create a card, letter or other work of art to send in the mail, write a song or a poem, or teach them how to connect energetically.  This can be done through an imaginary hug, a special prayer, or a dream meet-up where as they fall asleep they think of a place they want to meet their Mom, Dad or other loved one in their dream, and what they want to do together. We often use the beach or Disneyland for our dream meet-ups! They can also have imaginary visits where you would ask what they would want to do and what they would want to say to their other parent if they were there.

Keeping communication open and finding ways to connect helps your kiddo feel like the other parent is being included and is top of mind even though they can’t be together and it will help them feel more secure.

What if we don’t agree?

If you and your co-parent cannot agree, or you do not have a co-parent who is willing to be flexible and creative with you, do what you can on your side. If you have a written parenting plan as part of a divorce or other legal agreement, you will need to make reasonable efforts to carry it out if they are demanding that you do so.

Try to engage help in the form of a family counselor, pastor, mediator or co-parenting coach if you need help trying to reach an amended agreement for the short term.

And remember, as Wayne Dyer said, “Conflict cannot survive without your participation.” Don’t engage in anything other than a peaceful, direct discussion and process through any emotions or triggers on your side that come up as a result of something your co-parent is saying or doing.

The only thing you can ever control is yourself and how you react to others. In this time of fear and frenzy, don’t make it worse by adding to it.

Please Note: This should not be considered legal or medical advice. Please contact your attorney for guidance on required visits and your doctor for any medical questions regarding the safety of visits.

The post Co-Parenting During The Coronavirus Crisis appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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How To Process Fear, Shame & Anger After Narcissistic Abuse

 

The fear, shame and anger after narcissistic abuse can be incredibly intense. And, you may be suffering a host of other horrific emotions that are in obsessional repeat.

Feelings like heartbreak, regret, intense loss and total disbelief regarding what happened.

Sadly, many people after narcissistic abuse, never learn how to process these emotions effectively. Often, the best they can do is to barely manage these awful ongoing feelings.

This is only a recovery of survival; it certainly isn’t how you can Thrive after narcissistic abuse. We can get better and do better!

In today’s Thriver TV episode, I take you through the truth regarding how to process these emotions to gain freedom from them, so that you can access the life that myself and many other Thrivers are blessed to experience.

 

 

 

Video Transcript

Many people are shocked at the emotional effects that narcissistic abuse has had on them.

I know that you may be feeling the substantial trauma of incredible fear, shame and anger.

You may agonise over what is going to happen to you and your life now, and to those you love.

And, how on earth did you let this get so bad and allow all these things to happen to you?

And, how could this person be so cruel, malicious and conscienceless to do the things that they did?

Your emotional traumas may be so activated that it feels almost impossible to face normal tasks and get on with your life.

How do you process these intense emotions?

How can you let them go so that you can continue with life?

I’m going to explain exactly how that is possible in today’s TTV episode, in direct, powerful and fast ways.

Okay so let’s get started …

The first step is …

 

Know That Acceptance is Vital

In many ways, the first step is the hardest of all.

And I promise you that it is also the most vital because without this step you can’t reach the next ones.

Traditionally, there was a belief that there was a necessary process and long timeline for moving through grief and loss.

On the forefront of narcissistic abuse recovery, I promise you that this isn’t necessary. There are inner processes that surpass the need for these drawn-out stages … such as shock, denial, pain and guilt, anger, depression and so on and so forth.

These stages can be shifted out and moved through much more quickly. This is not about rushing them. This is about ensuring you don’t have to go through extended emotional agony that just isn’t necessary for true recovery.

The deeper Quantum Path and Spiritual Truth that starts with acceptance takes you from having a normal and often extreme suffering experience to a more extraordinary experience that teaches you that pain is inevitable, yet indefinite and ongoing suffering is no longer necessary.

The truth is by the time you need healing, you have already been through shock and denial and enormous amounts of pain, guilt, anger and depression and all the negative feelings that go with abuse.

There is an ability to wake up out of this and shift beyond this quite quickly.

I have found this capacity to be equally consistent for people just finding out they have been narcissistically abused, and those who have been suffering for decades. Time is not the criteria. What is the defining factor is the willingness to engage in acceptance.

 

What Is the Acceptance I’m Talking About?

It’s not everyday acceptance such as, “Oh gosh, this really did happen to me!” Rather it is a deep spiritual Quantum acceptance of, “Everything happens for a reason, and there is something for me to learn, heal and evolve here.”

And, “By doing so I can take my power back, release myself from this trauma, person and experience, and be able to enter more evolved experiences that are healthier and much more fulfilling for me.”

And, “This experience, as horrific as it has been, is helping me heal, awaken and enter a life that will truly gratify my heart and soul.”

In other words, it is the total understanding of, “I NEED to heal!”

I promise you, in the ten plus years that I’ve been helping others deeply heal and Thrive after narcissistic abuse, I have seen some dear souls get this immediately, and others that it takes longer to awaken to. Some never do at all.

Regardless, I bless everybody’s experience, because where you are at, is where you are at.

Personally, I nearly had to die to accept this. I was stubborn. I firmly believed that I was a victim, that he was a monster, and that there was absolutely no learning in this for me at all.

Thankfully, right at almost death’s knock, when there was virtually nothing left of me to live, I had the massive shift to want to partner my Soul and my Inner Being and heal the parts of me that I needed to.

That is when my true healing began. Without this shift, I would have died. I am certain of that.

Then I healed up those parts of myself which I used to self-abandon and cling to people and try to force them to love and accept me and grant me security. I finally learned how to be a healthy whole adult woman in her own body, capable of generating this for myself.

It took work, but it was so worth it.

I promise you that it will be the same for you.

 

Be Prepared to do the Inner Work

You may be starting to understand that inner work is vital to change your life.

We can’t change abusers. We can’t round them up and put them on an island in exile. We don’t even have structures and systems which can reliably hold these people accountable, let alone put them away.

But you can, in most circumstances, deeply and powerfully change yourself in order to have different experiences. As well as be an example to others to empower them to do the same.

It can be very hard for you to accept the following truth until you start living it – the only reliable way to get a narcissist firmly out of your life, it is to completely purge them out of your Inner Being first.

This may seem woo woo, like some spiritual New Age jargon.

Yet it is a highly quantifiable Quantum Truth, which you will understand when you start to live it as a life principle (not just regarding narcissists but for anything that is unwanted in your life).

The inner feeling and composition that you have precedes the outer events. When you have purged every vestige of the trauma, fear, pain and heartbreak of a narcissist out of your system, he or she becomes completely irrelevant.

Then this person emotionally and energetically has absolutely no emotional effect on you. That is when the spell is broken; they cannot extract narcissistic supply anymore, and everything they try to do starts to fall over and ultimately fails.

Without the ability to be able to get a feed anymore, the narcissist must depart from your life experience.

And they do.

This is totally in alignment with Quantum Law, so within, so without. When nothing of the narcissist remains inside of you, regardless of what he or she is up to, then the outer will shift to match it.

The same goes for every single thing in your life. When it’s gone on the inside emotionally, you will have the inspirations, power and confidence, as well as all of the support from legal and outside forces to assist in the elimination of this individual or thing.

In this Community, every week we receive beautiful glowing reports from people who are working with the NARP program being awarded wonderful property settlements and full custody rights of their children.

The consistent reports are not a coincidence. These people did the diligent inner work to clear out their fears and painful trauma-bonding to the narcissist. Then solution entered.

The inner work is so much more powerful than just trying to obtain knowledge. We must deeply change at the core of our Inner Being to be different and do differently. It’s almost impossible to try to think our way out of the terror, pain and horrific feelings that go with narcissistic abuse. It is so much easier to have a process to shift them out, and just go free from them.

Then you are no longer disempowered by them.

 

Being Triggered Happens – It’s How You Deal With it That Matters

We were all brought up to try to escape our painful feelings, instead of meeting them.

As a Thriver, I now know a different truth. I know that when I am triggered, it’s signalling me to a deep as yet unhealed part of myself and the situation or person bringing it to my attention is an A.I.D., an Angel In Disguise, posing as a difficult person or situation to help me find and reprogram this part of myself to evolve myself into a more actualised human being.

This has completely changed my life beyond description.

Yes, I still get triggered. I am totally human. I even share about these triggers on social media so that I can help inspire people to continually evolve rather than suffer in their triggers.

Before Thriving I used to self-avoid, self-abandon and self-medicate myself with distractions and addictions. Things such as workaholism, smoking, excessive social media use and socialising, drinking, hanging on to people who were hurting me, and trying to get them to take away my pain for me.

I used to do everything other than turn inwards to heal myself, and of course the false substitutes I used for comfort only granted fleeting relief and the pain kept coming back. Because I didn’t understand that the triggers were the signal to heal myself.

Now, I adore being triggered with any feelings of fear, shame, anger and pain that is the human experience.

Absolutely I feel it. I am a sensitive person, just as I know many of you are too!

Now I fully embrace courageously my opportunity for evolution. What else is there to do if I don’t want a crappy life stuck in repeat with the same pain?

I know that when this happens to me if I turn inwards with love to myself and do a Quantum Freedom Healing (NARP Module) then I will release the trauma and the accompanying painful and false belief systems, and immediately reprogram them with my Superconscious/Source Self.

Then automatically I’m changed. I am no longer the old program of the painful emotions. I have shifted into peace, wisdom and solution instead.

This means the panic, helplessness and hopelessness is gone and is replaced with a solid and sound understanding of what to do.

I promise you that you will have the same experience when you start living this life.

There is another incredible and beautiful benefit. As you evolve upwards you don’t have to keep repeating the same painful cycles. You reach into higher echelons of love and life, ones that you didn’t have access to before doing the inner work.

No longer will you keep saying, “Why is my life always like this?” Because you will be in the driver’s seat of changing it for real.

If you deeply understand this, please pause this video and let me know in your comments below by writing, “I get it!”

If you are ready to access this level of healing, by doing the necessary inner healing, then join me by clicking this link.

And, if you enjoyed this, I’d love you like and share it with other people who you know are also struggling with processing their emotional suffering.

And as always, I look forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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co-parenting during COVID-19

Coronavirus and child custody: Co-parenting during the pandemic

co-parenting during COVID-19

As a parent, you want to spend as much time with your children as humanly possible. You want to watch them learn and grow, as the years pass. Even after a divorce, you still are able to enjoy precious moments with them during your parenting time.

However, with the Coronavirus Disease (COVID-19) pandemic that has swept the country, your parenting time may become part of the uncertainty.

While you want to maintain the World Health Organization recommendations regarding social distancing, hygiene, and sanitation, you still should be able to observe regular parenting time during this difficult time. However, your co-parent may be making that more difficult.

From a safety standpoint, it is understandable that your
co-parent is concerned over the prospect that your shared children may catch
the virus, or that you may while they are in your care. Additionally, many
areas of the country have shelter-in-place orders that prevent unnecessary
travel.

However, that does not extend to child custody drop-offs or
pick-ups.

Issues with shelter-in-place
and custody travel

According to Cordell & Cordell family law attorney Charles Hatley, residents are required to stay indoors except to perform certain necessary activities. These activities include buying food, seeking medical treatment, banking, and laundromat services. This also includes any travel necessary to enforce a court order and for purposes of caring for a child or family member.

Therefore, the shelter-in-place orders, or stay-at-home
orders, do not impact your right to parenting time, whether there is actually a
custody and parenting time order. However, that does not mean the other parent
will not misconstrue or try to abuse these orders in an attempt to block your
access to your child.

You may be like many parents during this coronavirus crisis who
are being forced to miss scheduled parenting time because of a co-parent who
feels honoring the court order is unsafe.

Facing parenting
time denial

During a recent webinar, Cordell & Cordell CEO, Executive/Managing Partner Scott Trout and Partner Dan Cuneo discussed how the coronavirus has been impacting regularly scheduled parenting time, and they spoke about the challenges that fathers have been facing as they deal with the ramifications of existing and legally-binding custody schedules no longer being upheld.

“If you are being denied time, there still may be remedies
available to you,” Mr. Cuneo said. “We want you to reach out and contact an
attorney and discuss what are your options, what do we need to do. It could
depend upon the jurisdiction that you’re in. There are essential remedies
available to you, and we want to make sure that you’re not being taken
advantage of and that you’re not sitting back and missing out on time.”

Additionally, this webinar detailed how this type of situation is being handled in several areas of the country. For example, in California, where the shelter-in-place order has been in effect since March 19, family courts are emphasizing the use of common sense, according to Cordell & Cordell Lead Litigator Jason Hopper.

“The standing order from almost all of our courts are that
the existing orders are to be followed,” Mr. Hopper said. “Parenting time and
is deemed essential travel. It’s not within the confines of the shelter in
place rules.”

Filing with family
court still possible

While there may be logistical issues involved in the family
court process during this shutdown associated with the coronavirus pandemic, you
and your family law attorney still are able to file in your state.

“In-person court is banned, so if you have a case, where you are supposed to be seeing your children and your ex-wife has cut you off, we can’t run full throttle into court to file anything and get in front of a judge immediately,” said Cordell & Cordell Litigation Partner Kristin Zurek. “But our courts are still open for filings, so it’s important to know that if something is going on and you want to bring it to the judge’s attention, go talk to your lawyer. You have the ability to upload pleadings to the court.”

While the court may be receiving filings, you may need more,
in order to incite action from the family courts under these circumstances. You
may need to illustrate that this is an emergency situation.

“The judge’s determination needs to be whether or not this
is an emergency that requires a phone conference or a video conference to deal
with it or if it’s something that’s going to have to wait until court reopens,”
Ms. Zurek said.

While the courts may find that the situation is not deemed
to be an emergency, it still is worthwhile to file, offering the court
documented evidence of how much you care about your children.

“It’s still important to get that on file as soon as possible, because you don’t want strategically, the court saying when court is back in session ‘Well, you must have not thought it was that important, because you didn’t file anything,’” said Cordell & Cordell Litigation Partner Kelly Burris. “It’s important to get things on file and see what options you have.”

Child support
challenges

Additionally, issues surrounding child support may arise
during the coronavirus pandemic that may require legal attention. Much of the
population is experiencing financial hardship, and many are expected to lose
their employment. If you do lose your job or find yourself with some sort of
wage reduction, how will you support your children and pay the court-ordered
child support during this challenging time?

“If you are facing a job loss or a wage reduction, one of
the first, most practical things you can do without involving an attorney is to
approach your employer and ask if they will be providing any qualified disaster
relief payments,” Mr. Hopper said. “Typically, when an employer provides any
type of compensation or benefit to an employee, that’s going to be a taxable
event. However, there are provisions within federal code and Internal Revenue
code, as well as in many states’ revenue codes that allow for employers to
provide to employees when there is a disaster declaration, like there is
currently nationwide, qualified disaster relief payments.”

While this may partially assist your financial situation,
you still must deal with the child support order itself. Given the
circumstance, seeking legal assistance may be the only way of navigating these
complex waters and avoiding the piling up of payments that you can no longer
afford.

“Consult with an attorney,” Mr. Hopper said. “You likely
have modification rights available to you.”

If you do not pursue modification, the child support
payments do not go away, just because you no longer have a job or because of
the coronavirus pandemic. You still can find yourself facing hefty child
support payments that if ignored, can become overwhelming, especially with your
children caught in the crossfires.

“You have to file your modification immediately,” said Cordell & Cordell Litigation Partner Rick Julius. “If things change and you don’t find it to be financially beneficial to you once the courts get open, you at least, have that decision down the road. Pennsylvania courts [Mr. Julius’ licensed state] are only going to go back as that modification filing date, in order to do that. It may end up that when it gets heard, that the financial situation has corrected itself and you may be entitled to retroactive modification of that time period.”

Parent, co-parent,
and monitor the situation

With all of the health and economic uncertainty caused by
the coronavirus pandemic, it is necessary for you to learn as much as possible
regarding your state’s family court system and how they handle emergency
situations. That way, if you find yourself facing unemployment with a large
monthly child support payment, or a co-parent who refuses to adhere to the
parenting time issued by the court, you know how to react.

It also is important to understand the perspective of your
children during this pandemic. They may be confused or scared, and as a parent,
it is necessary for you to take time for them, explaining to them the situation
in terms that they understand and monitor their wellness as much as possible.

If it is possible to remain amicable with your co-parent
during this time, do so. Communication and cooperation are necessary components
to co-parenting during normal situations, but with the coronavirus pandemic, it
becomes even more crucial that you put the needs of your children first, before
any animosity.

While this may be an instance of uncertainty, it is necessary for you to monitor the situation from a legal perspective and contact your family law attorney if you feel that changes need to be made.

Related coronavirus coverage:

Free Webinar: Can the Coronavirus Affect Custodial Rights? How Divorces and Parenting Time May Be Impacted

Can I make up lost parenting time due to the COVID-19 pandemic?

Does a Shelter-in-Place Order Limit my Right to Parenting Time?

The post Coronavirus and child custody: Co-parenting during the pandemic appeared first on Dads Divorce.

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parenting time

Can I make up lost parenting time due to quarantine during the COVID-19 pandemic?

parenting time

Question:

Can I make up lost parenting time due to quarantine during the COVID-19 pandemic?

Answer:

I practice law in the state Ohio. Unless you live there, I
cannot inform you as to the specific laws of your state, but I can provide you
with general tips in divorce and child custody, as it relates to the COVID-19
pandemic.

Ohio courts have been very clear on this point. They have
indicated that all parenting exchanges and schedules continue to be in full
force and effect. If your child has not been on spring break yet, any time off
due to the pandemic would be deemed regular parenting time, and the scheduled
spring break would still be treated separately under the holiday schedule of
your county or orders governing your parenting time currently in effect.

However, if parenting time is missed, the courts will most
likely grant make-up time after restrictions have been relaxed. I have been
recommending agreement on the make-up time before forgoing the parenting time
itself to all my clients.

While it is clear the courts will still expect people to
follow the current orders, it is unclear whether such denials of parenting time
will result in findings of contempt. Under Ohio law, if there is a finding of
contempt, you can be entitled to receive a portion or even all your attorney
fees spent to prosecute the action.

However, the court has a lot of discretion in making those
awards. As such, I have concerns that the courts will likely find the denial of
parenting time during the pandemic a reasonable reaction, and thus, not
egregious enough to result in an attorney fee award. While this assessment may
be incorrect, it has been my experience that you only receive a portion of
attorney fees, never the whole amount even in the strongest of cases.
Therefore, I suggest establishing the make-up parenting time dates prior to
conceding parenting time.

I want to stress that this is in relation to the Ohio laws
and orders currently in effect. These health measures change almost daily, so
you need to be sure you are following up with the numerous resources offered
through your state to check and see what the current orders are. Many states
that have taken such measures still have carved out exceptions that include
parenting time exchanges, so again, be sure to carefully read the current
orders in effect.

Finally, if there is a lockdown and parenting exchanges
are not excluded, I would still expect courts to grant make-up parenting time
for any time missed during the pandemic.

To arrange an initial consultation to discuss divorce rights for
men with a Cordell & Cordell attorney, including 
Ohio divorce lawyer Daniel
White, 
contact Cordell
& Cordell
.

The post Can I make up lost parenting time due to quarantine during the COVID-19 pandemic? appeared first on Dads Divorce.

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The Effects of COVID-19 on Child Custody Matters

The Effects of COVID-19 on Child Custody Matters

Originally published by Francesca Blackard.

By

As cases of COVID-19 are continually popping up in the North Texas region (currently 155 confirmed cases in Dallas County and growing) and with the recent “Stay Home Stay Safe” Order that went into effect at 11:59 PM on March 23, 2020, parents are scrambling to find reliable answers to their questions regarding possession schedules and quarantine, as well as concerns about child support. These are questions that are relatively unprecedented in today’s world, and with the courts recently ruling on several of these topics, this blog seeks to provide helpful updates during this difficult time.

In its March 17, 2020 emergency order, the Supreme Court of Texas, ordered that court-ordered possession schedules remain in accordance with any original published school calendar regardless of the newly extended Spring Breaks or school closures. This order is effective until May 8, 2020 or until further notice. However, as the situation continues to ramp up, and fears about this pandemic are at an all-time high, many parents want to take precautionary measures to keep their family safe.

Various concerns have arisen regarding possession schedules when one parent is quarantined for possible contraction of COVID-19. The Dallas County family courts have recently released a statement encouraging parents to keep open lines of communication with and one another and to make all decisions with the well-being and health of the child as the primary concern. This communication should include notifying the other parent of any exposure to or a positive diagnosis of COVID-19, as well as discussing any actions necessary to ensure the child’s safety. Unfortunately, disagreements regarding the custody or possession of a child may arise, and it is imperative that you consult with your attorney to discuss questions about establishing alternative schedules before making any decisions with your co-parent or ex-spouse
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Curated by Texas Bar Today. Follow us on Twitter @texasbartoday.



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Closed Courts Due To Coronavirus?  Some Couples May Choose To Fast-Track Their Divorce By Other Means?

closed courts due to coronavirus

 

With the world turned upside down, and Covid-19 disrupting every facet and sector of life as we have known it, one ongoing and soon to be a repetitive problem is how to try cases when the courtrooms are closed.

Every week (and possibly month that passes) compounds the problem because it will take even longer to resolve matters like spousal support, the division of assets, and custody arrangements when divorcing parents can’t agree.

So, now what? The longer the courts are closed, the longer the delay in having matters adjudicated.

Closed Courts Due To Coronavirus? How to Fast-Track Your Divorce

The courts could be backed up for not only weeks, but months, and possibly years.

Many attorneys are urging their clients to opt for audio and visual face-to-face platforms to resolve their issues. With the rapid advancements in technology these days, a virtual courtroom could possibly take the place of an actual courtroom, as we have known it.

The use of technology may also save divorcing couples money as they proceed with their divorce process with little or no interruption. And, with the advent of even more human connectability online, it is even easier to get the judicial job done in most cases.

The following are a few suggestions to help you fast-track your divorce process if your case is one that was headed for the courtroom. In many cases, these recommendations could save you from having to endure that uncomfortable and nerve-wracking public courtroom trial, which at best is unpredictable.

There are no guarantees that your case will be heard as scheduled, as you matter may be continued or delayed due to the court’s schedule. These suggestions might also help you get on with your new life much more quickly.

1. Mediation and Arbitration: You may have already tried mediation or arbitration, but if you haven’t gone that route yet, consider it. There are plenty of agencies that offer these services, and with the stressful times we are living in, this approach could hasten a resolution and help you get to the finish line.

Five of the major organizations that provide these services in the Los Angeles area include: ADR (Alternate Dispute Resolution); JAMS (Judicial Arbitration and Mediation Services); ARC (Alternative Resolution Centers); AAA (the American Arbitration Association); and the Signature Resolution Panel. The latter was founded by a retired judge.  Most retired judges are highly qualified and seasoned.

2. Consider reaching out to others: Your family therapist, a clergy person, a trusted advisor—someone you both respect and admire, or let your attorney and your soon-to-be ex’s, sit down at the table and see if they can resolve your case outside the courtroom in light of these trying times.

3. Don’t get caught up in the petty stuff: Sure, you’re mad, angry, sad and likely experiencing tremendous trauma and distress, but do you want to prolong your divorce and battle over little things? Is it really worth it to you? Do you want to wait for what might be months to have your case heard/resolved?

4. Consider the drastic changes and times we now live in: If you have been in litigation for months or even years, reassess your priorities and ask if waiting even longer than you anticipated will further impact your wallet or peace of mind. The Covid-19 virus has been a wake-up call for many. Perhaps you have a new perspective on getting through your divorce, now; maybe it’s not sensible to wait for a re-opened courtroom

5. Hire a retired judge: This is my highest recommendation. There are many seasoned judges since retired, who work for many couples to adjudicate —preside over divorce trials—who are more than capable to try your case.

While this is often the choice you hear about when celebrities want privacy in their divorce proceedings (they don’t want their trials going public), it can work for you as well. This choice will also save time, reduce emotional headaches, and afford you ultimate privacy. You may think that hiring a retired judge might cost a fortune, not so. In total, fees and costs may be less than what you might spend if you wait for your trial to be continued in these uncertain times.

As I mentioned, your place in line is likely to be further delayed. Not only might your case be delayed, it may take weeks for you to get a date from the court. In sum, allowing a private judge to preside over your trial might be the smartest and more prudent thing you can do. And, you can do this via video conferencing. An added bonus: You won’t have to be in the same room as your ex. Video conferencing creates a presence for all, but eliminates the close proximity of being in the same space as your ex.  This arrangement helps to subdue a sense of intimidation.

6. No choice but the courts, immediately: Naturally, there are caveats to everything, and needing a restraining order for events such a domestic violence incident, lack of child support, and a parent not returning the child to the other, are examples that will need to be heard immediately.

While the courts may not be in session inside the courthouse, they are still taking ex-party filings and hearing those emergency cases. If you’re in immediate danger (violation of restraining order(s) or domestic violence, your ex absconding with your child(ren)), you can always call your local police department or fire department. They are trained to handle emergency situations.

My final thoughts are these: The welfare and safety, and the recovery of economic losses due to Covid-19, is where the focus will be in the coming days, weeks and months. Your divorce will likely take a back seat in terms of priority for you and your ex.

Confer with your attorney. Ask him/her to further explain these options listed above.  Ultimately, together you and your attorney will need to choose the most sensible course of action according to the issues in your matter.

The post Closed Courts Due To Coronavirus?  Some Couples May Choose To Fast-Track Their Divorce By Other Means? appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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