How To Know If A Narcissist Is Finished With You

How To Know If A Narcissist Is Finished With You

 

I can understand totally how wondering if a narcissist has finished with you can haunt you.

And if we obsess about this, it can be very difficult to move on with our life.

Many people ask these things often…

  • Will the narcissist try to hoover me?
  • What does it mean when things suddenly go quiet?
  • What should I make of the narcissist contacting me now after (insert the timeframe from days to years)?
  • Could all the things that he or she did start up again?

So, how do you know if a narcissist is finished with you?

Or really is this even the right question for us to be asking?

 

Handing Our Power Away

I think a very important point to understand is that the question of whether a narcissist is finished with you doesn’t just apply when a toxic relationship is finished. When you are going through narcissistic abuse, often or even daily, you may wonder whether or not the narcissist is ‘finished with you’.

Let me explain…

You wonder if they are ‘finished’ with that bout of making your head spin or if there will be any reprieve from the lies, confusing behaviour, accusations, smearing and projections.

We all went through this – the clinging on; the trying to appease or minimalise their behaviour by us doing something different or lecturing and prescribing to them to try to get them to see sense and decency in amongst their nastiness and insanity … so that finally we could feel loved, safe and sane.

A powerful Quantum Truth of Life is: the more we try to control someone else in order to feel loved, safe and sane, the more we end up out of control and controlled by them.

And, even after the narcissist’s discharge of us or our trying to stay away and uphold No Contact, we can still be hooked into believing our ability to feel whole, safe and sane rests on their behaviour.

This is an illusion – it doesn’t.

When we are focused on what someone else is or isn’t doing in order to have our own inner solidness and Life, this is for a very important reason. Emotionally within we have unhealed parts that have assigned someone else to be our ‘Source’ of something. We feel dependent. We hope this person will stop what they are doing and instead grant us what we don’t yet know we are capable of generating ourselves (regardless of what they do or don’t do) – namely love, approval, security and survival (or all four). These are deep inner hooks we may not be aware of, even in the case of having no love or longing left for this person at all, yet still being hooked in by the nasty things they are doing to us. Or maybe we carry such guilt and obligation from our earlier programming that we can’t let go of trying to fix and help this person.

Wondering if a narcissist is finished with you, is such a common trap to fall into. However, I promise you that when you learn how to take your power back and heal the Thriver Way, you will know that your life is not reliant on what other people are or aren’t doing.

 

Trauma Is the Fuel

How can you stop wondering whether a narcissist is finished with you?

The answer is this: accept that the trauma of everything you have suffered and are suffering provides the grandest opportunity to turn inwards to heal yourself.

When you adopt the greatest mission of your life – to become a whole source of love, approval, security and survival – you won’t keep wondering if a narcissist is finished with you; you will be too focused on resolving and developing your own inner power.

Our consciousness is an incredibly powerful entity – an interconnected wave function that Quantum Science now knows is directly affecting our outer realities. I have said the following often in my blogs, YouTube videos and even in every response I grant to people looking for help…

The greatest understanding for your liberation, healing, and resurrection after narcissistic abuse is the Quantum Law of so within, so without.

If you can embrace that you are so powerful and magnificent that you affect The Field directly with your emotional resonance, then you know that to change your life you need to change your emotional resonance.

The goal of your entire life is to BE everything at an emotional level that you seek. Then you will be the person who chooses and engages with healthy people and situations, and easily distinguishes and leaves alone who and what isn’t good for you.

That is what taking your power back REALLY means.

I believe at the core of our spirit we are already whole. It is just the human experience collectively, generationally and through unconscious parenting created a pressure cooker of emotional trauma that we absorbed. And this causes dysregulation to our beliefs and subconscious wiring.

Trauma, when released, allows us to reset back to our organic, already existing inner coded wholeness – the knowing of Who We Are and How to BE in The Field.

How do we release our trauma to BE this?

Neuroscientists have proven that you can’t think and talk your way out of inner trauma; that you need to take your attention off your outer experience and into your inner experience to address it. By doing so you are in contact with and activate the areas of the brain and nervous system necessary to resolve your trauma.

Another startling thing happens when we do this – we create an inner relationship that puts us back in the driving seat of being our own Source. It means that we are so much less co-dependent on people providing for us what, as healthy whole adults, we need to generate ourselves.

Even before anything shifts, we start to feel the love, security, solidness and peace that ‘all is well’ in ourselves and our life, which we had always been searching for just in all the wrong places.

The truth is, as adults no one can provide us with this. We can only be-come whole and healthy emotionally and then share a healthy and whole life with healthy and whole others. When we ‘be’ it then ‘comes’ – that’s what be-come really means.

When we understand the Quantum Law of so within, so without, there is no option other than to be-come whole in the means of self-love, worth, security and survival – otherwise we don’t get people turning up to take care of this wholeness, rather they turn up representing the evidence that we are not yet whole.

If you are still questioning if the narcissist has finished with you, then you have not yet turned inwards to know and partake in the truth – your only true mission is to clean up within and then all you seek can and will follow.

 

Painful Beliefs to Up-level

Many of you lovely NARPers have expressed how much you are getting from my sharing of certain beliefs that we can heal for big evolution results.

If you know that you are still handing power away to the narcissist, even just by still thinking about him or her, you may want to check these beliefs and see if they can be felt in your body – meaning that the traumas generating these beliefs still exist there.

  • This person can derail my life.
  • This person can affect me.
  • I am missing this person and I still feel like I need them or want them in my life.
  • I need to be on guard because I am scared of what may happen or what I may do if this person contacts me.

Please know these are all incredible normal obsessions that we have when we are in No Contact with a narcissist – but they don’t serve us. They keep us stuck in a holding pattern of trauma and the victimised peptide addictions coursing and multiplying through our cellular being.

We don’t get well and we can’t seem to go forward in our life.

Here are some goal setting statements you may wish to use with the NARP Version 3 Goal Setting Module.

  • I am solid in my body, truth and power, impervious to what others do or don’t do.
  • I am my True Self with no need to change anyone’s behaviour or opinion towards me. My power lies in what I believe, am and do.
  • I lovingly partner with and adore me eternally. Real love, power, and safety become my reality everywhere.
  • I accept and release my triggers, fill with Light and keep evolving into grander, more abundant and joyful trajectories.

If you are determined to shift yourself on the inside into this level of personal evolution – I want you to write below, ‘By healing me – my True Self, Life and Love be-comes real’.

In the first group of belief systems above the narcissist is still living on inside of you, insidiously controlling, limiting and defining your life.

In the second group you are taking your power back by becoming the internal shift that you want your outer world to reflect.

Now let’s get to where this is REALLY all leading to.

 

Have YOU Finished With the Narcissist?

I love this question for a variety of reasons – the main one being that this is the real question you need to get very interested in.

Being finished with the narcissist means we are in No Contact and we are purging this person psychically, mentally, emotionally and physically out of our Being. We do this by addressing all the traumas they have triggered within us, releasing them and living free of them.

Then what we discover is that our inner unconscious programs were hooking us to these people. All our unfinished trauma histories in our beings, including collective, generational, past life and childhood traumas, are released and reprogrammed as well.

What this literally means is that energetically and emotionally we are no longer a match for this person. We are finished with a narcissist when they no longer mean anything to us.

The incredible irony is that when there is no longer any energetic energy to extract from us mentally, emotionally or psychically, then they are finished with us too – because there is NO narcissistic supply available for their efforts.

People may think this is just a grey rock thing. It’s not – it must be on so much of a deeper level than grey rock. Quantum Science now knows that consciousness is connected through unseen wave functions. And this means that the narcissist is getting a feed from you even if you have had twenty years of No Contact but are still stuck in the trauma of what happened to you.

That’s why a TOTAL emotional, subconscious and cellular detox needs to take place.

When we get very dedicated to our cellular trauma detox, this transition can start to happen more powerfully and quickly than we could have ever believed. Some people literally achieve it in weeks, even after decades of repeat trauma.

I really hope this blog has helped put all of your wonderings about knowing for sure if a narcissist has finished with you into deep Quantum perspective for you.

I’d love to help you achieve vital emotional and energetic detoxing, so you couldn’t care less if a narcissist is finished with you, because you are claiming your True Self and True Life with both hands – regardless of what he or she tries to do.

You can do this by signing up to my free inner transformational resources, which grant you two free ebooks, my 16-day free course, and a free workshop where you learn how to release your trauma and live free from it.

I look forward to your comments and questions below.

 

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The Narcissist Has No Power Over You

The Narcissist Has No Power Over You

 

Narcissists can leave you feeling overpowered, helpless and hopeless and wondering if you will ever feel safe and healthy again.

I understand these feelings as this is how I felt at the hands of narcissists too.

When we are in the middle of narcissistic abuse it is easy to hand over all our power to someone we believe is powerful but into today’s episode, I want to share with you why I believe that a Narcissist is NOT powerful and why Quantum truths will set you free.

The irony is that the WAY to do it has been there waiting for us all along, in an accessible place – we just may not have realised it.

 

 

Video Transcript

I know that narcissists seem all-powerful. Many people, myself included, have likened them to Terminators – relentless machines that just do not give up when they seem determined to destroy your life.

Today I’m telling you this is not the truth. There is a way where you can take your power back and know that narcissists do not have power over you.

If you are suffering the horrible, unspeakable trauma of what a narcissist has done or is doing to you, you really need to know what I am about to share with you.

This information literally saved my life. And I know it could save yours from almost certain destruction as well.

So … before we get started I want to remind you that if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Okay, let’s move on into this information.

 

Some Quantum and Energetic Truths

Those of you who are logically based, you may find the following pretty woohoo. Once upon a time I would have too. Yet I will say this – when you have had enough of being defeated and smashed at every turn by a narcissist, you will try radical things to stop it.

This I believe and live with every part of my Being – so within so without.

Which means quite simply and succinctly: ‘If I change my inner emotional experience about something, then the experience must change in my outer experience.’

Why is this the case?

Because Quantum and Neuro Scientists are now proving what spiritualists have known for a very long time. That our consciousness is directly connected to everything and everyone as interconnected wave functions. Therefore, we are no longer a part of a random ‘separated’ Universe – we are Quantum Creators able to change our outer Universe by consciously adopting a new inner Universe.

I don’t know about you – I was always spiritual and very much in the belief of ‘interconnectedness’, however, I was never forced to truly ‘get’ this until narcissistic abuse. The reason I wasn’t was because NEVER in my life had I lived the experience of being attacked so mercilessly and cruelly in ways that were obviously without conscience – and therefore to me were senseless.

Why would anyone want to destroy someone’s life?

Why would someone want to bring another person to their knees with pathological lies and malicious acts and treat them with such contempt?

It defied everything that I believed to be ‘human’.

Like most of us, I tried to combat this is the human way. I was distraught, devastated and incensed and I tried to fight back. I went to authorities and friends, family and associates to tell them what was happening to me.

Yet I was powerless to make any headway with these people – they didn’t believe me. Even when I had proof, they didn’t believe me. I didn’t get any help from them. Instead I was distrusted and blamed by them, and I became further traumatised and abandoned. People thought I was the crazy one and that he was the abused one.

I was missing the biggest piece of the puzzle – so within, so without.

I didn’t realise that narcissists and narcissistic abuse is an energetic phenomenon of epic proportions showing us the utter Quantum Truth of matters – Our inner, unhealed, traumatised state is exactly what the narcissist continues to deliver to us.

Please know in no way am I invalidating what you have been through. Of course, you will be traumatised! I remember being so traumatised that even getting an hour’s straight sleep or eating a few mouthfuls of food was a major accomplishment. My life-force ended up so disturbed and dysregulated from narcissistic abuse that I had a complete psychotic and adrenal breakdown.

I need you to know in no way am I being glib or dismissive about the shocking mind-boggling trauma that narcissists inflict on us.

But rather than bang on about that, my mission and my job is to save your life-force just as I did my own. That is why I am here to help you awaken to the ONLY way we can do this, which is to release and up level beyond the trauma inside and become emotionally calm and clear regardless of what the narcissist is or isn’t doing – and then narcissists can no longer be the experience of trauma in our life.

 

A Quantum Leap

A narcissist’s supposed unstoppable terror campaign can be shocking.

Judy had been divorced for five years from her narcissistic husband. She reported to the police still random suffering break-ins to her apartment (she had moved twelve times in the last five years), her tires being slashed, tracking devices put on her car, her technology, including bank accounts, being hacked, and every time she got a new job being fired unexpectedly because of covert smearing.

She said the narcissist had bombarded her with all sorts of horrific episodes that had left her beyond deranged.

Of course, to outside people it seemed like Judy was making all of this up and that she was suffering paranoid delusions. Many of us have experienced ‘things’ with narcissists that are stranger than fiction. Things that people can’t even fathom as believable.

This was the thing – I knew that it was possible for Judy to be suffering these attacks, and I also knew that if she continued being destroyed on the inside that she would be disintegrated on the outside and would forever remain powerless.

Many people like Judy, sadly, who are at this level of feeling smashed by a narcissist, are not responsive to doing inner work and releasing their highly activated trauma. And I understand why – I’ve been there. The more traumatised we are, the more we are in hyperarousal with our survival brain focused on trying to combat the outer world to try to get change and relief.

Yet, we have no power there – at all. The only power we have is inside, in the unseen world, the Quantum interconnectedness with what a narcissist is doing within the wave function of our visceral and emotional self.

Something in Judy clicked. Maybe when you already feel dead inside, hopeless and helpless, you know there is nothing else to do. I understand this because that was my experience too – I like Judy only turned inwards after exhausting every other option.

Most people who are ‘doers’ struggle with this – and quite understandably!

Judy started her NARP (Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program) healings. She took all focus off what he would do next and worked the healings as if there was nothing else to do – and there wasn’t. She had no job, no friends and family supporting her (they had all turned away); no way to pay her bills and absolutely nothing to look forward to.

She was past the point of caring to try to ‘do’ anything – and so she got down to the job of attending to her Beingness.

Small things continued to happen to her, but she ignored trying to combat them. ‘What’s the point?’ she said. She went inside herself with NARP and released all the trauma that was being triggered within.

A little after a month, Judy couldn’t care less what he tried to do; she fully felt like ‘Life’ had her back and would work out in her favour. She was sleeping, eating and had a new job. She had no terror of losing her job, and she didn’t.

Not long after that, while doing a Quanta Freedom Healing with me, she told me nothing had happened – at all. Everything had stopped. We worked on her fear of it starting up again and she shifted into the inner space of ‘If it does, I’ll just go within and release that traumatised trigger as well – that’s all I have to do!’

That was the day the fear was completely gone. Judy had fully anchored into her Quantum Truth – ‘On every topic in my life I am the Creator if it. My inner experience generates my outer – always.’

She never experienced anything happening to her again.

I have seen over the last ten plus years, in thousands of cases, how this formula irrefutably works – it’s a Law as absolute as gravity. I have seen countless people in custody and property battles, and dealing with stalking, harassment, smearing and other obscene things, all get peace, resolution and an end to the narcissist being able to hurt them, when they go inside and embrace and release the corresponding trauma.

Of course, when we are flooded with trauma there may be things we think are happening that aren’t. Or maybe they are. It didn’t matter whether Judy was suffering all of these previous attacks for real or not. Trauma is trauma and when it is purged from our inner experience, then our real life experience shifts – no matter what the source of the inner experience was.

Belief In The Unseen

I know it can be hard to believe in a force that you can’t see. As I’ve mentioned, I used to be very left-brain focused as well.

However, think about this: How does your subconscious instruct your entire being to process billions of tasks in ways that your left brain can’t even begin to understand, and isn’t even consciously aware of happening?

Trauma experts and neuroscientists now know that the subconscious brain is responsible for 95% of the unfolding of your entire life experience by the time you are 35 years of age. Your subconscious is in your body; it is all going on in your visceral and emotional experiences. This is where your attention, focus and efforts need to be to change your life.

I totally agree with the experts, and this is why my healing system humbly works. It is what the Thriver Movement is all about – getting us into our Beings to get the real healing work done where it needs to be.

True healing is an inner, unseen, somatically felt journey that I created in a practical, step-by-step way. A journey where you don’t have to work any of it out, you just need to follow the instructions and try it for yourself.

If you have had enough of the fear and the pain of what the narcissist in your life is doing to you or the trauma continuing in your inner world, even if he or she is gone from your life, it’s time to release yourself

If you are with me, please write below, ‘It’s time to turn inwards and release myself NOW!’.

To start turning your fear into relief and personal power today, click the link at the top right of this video, to connect with my free inner transformational resources.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

Please write your comments and questions below, as I love answering them for you!

 

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Is My Adult Child A Narcissist? When Helping Them Is Hurting You

Is My Adult Child A Narcissist? When Helping Them Is Hurting You

 

Is my adult child a narcissist? is one of the most devastating questions a parent can ask.

Some years ago, I went through this terrible trauma myself.

In today’s Thriver TV I want to help you realise what is necessary for you to know whether or not your child is narcissistic…

…and how to BE your most healthy and powerful, for all concerned, and possibly able to discover that your adult child isn’t narcissistic and is capable of being respectful and loving.

Regardless of the outcome, there is an even more powerful truth that you will need to watch today’s video to understand.

It’s my most heartfelt wish today, if you are struggling with the agony of your child being narcissistic, that this episode will help grant you peace, strength and direction.

 

 

Video Transcript

Many people in this Community have asked this question.

In fact, once upon a time I asked this question myself.

In Today’s Thriver TV Episode, I want to help you understand whether or not your adult child is being narcissistically abusive and, even more than this, I want to help you understand how you need to BE to help yourself regardless of the outcome.

Please listen up, because I know if this is your situation this episode is going to help you a lot.

Okay … before we get started, I want to remind you that if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Let’s get started…

 

What We Thought WOULD Help

First of all, I want to address many of the false premises we often believe as parents that do not help our children in any shape or form.

The main ones are:

That we help our children by giving them all we can to help them.

It doesn’t help!

When we don’t allow our children to experience actions and consequences and disappointments, and by doing so allow them to become self-generative, they don’t have to take responsibility for themselves or get well.

Let me tell you about a father I know called Laurence who had his 23-year-old daughter Emily living with him. Emily, a highly intelligent and capable girl, had been through a lot due to Laurence and her mother’s breakup.

Laurence felt extremely guilty because of this. She lived with Laurence rent free, didn’t contribute any money to bills, and stayed at home all day because she said that she was too depressed to work.

Emily constantly demanded money from her father for cigarettes and her entertainment costs, which Laurence gave her every time she threw a tantrum to get her own way. It could be argued that Emily absolutely was acting narcissistically – the way she talked to her father and treated him was abysmal.

Nothing was changing and Emily did not have to be any different. She had a guaranteed roof over her head and could get pretty much anything she wanted.

Which brings me to the next point…

Our children are never going to be self-generative or respectful and grateful if we try to shoulder them and let them take the easy way out. We may believe that by taking the burden for them we are helping protect them and allowing them to get well. However, really what is happening is that we are holding our children back, just as a mother bird would be by not nudging her babies out of the nest.

When our children have never had to flap their wings and learn to fly for themselves, their self-esteem is diminished and they are held back from branching out, taking risks and growing.

For our children this means that they are likely to be depressed, feel inferior and incapable, and as a result lash out and take it out on the people closest to them.

I went through this too, with my son Zac. Whilst he was depressed, addicted to drugs and stuck at home, with me allowing him to be there and looking after him he didn’t get better. Of course, whilst this was happening I was still lecturing and prescribing – which were my futile attempts to try to get him motivated. It was when I forced Zac to move out at 19 years of age and I started working diligently on myself to stop seeing him as broken and hopeless, that he came into his power and light.

Truly, I was so close to believing he was a narcissist – and yet he is anything but. Rather he was sick and was being enabled by me to stay sick. Also, whilst my son Zac stayed at home, I was receiving the abuse from him that I didn’t yet understand wasn’t my reality.

When I became clear and stood into my power, values and truth for my life, he followed.

 

What Is Necessary When Suffering Trauma From Your Child?

How do you know if your child is narcissistic or not? The truth is you won’t know until you get clear on your own healing, solidness, values and truth.

And I really want you to know this from the very bottom of my heart. If you have an adult child who you suspect is acting narcissistically, you are not going to help them get well or make them start treating you decently and respectfully until you start respecting yourself and take a stand in your truth.

I have seen parent upon parent in this community, as I did myself for a long time too, try to stop the terrible trauma that their adult child was causing them when they themselves (the parent) were still broken and traumatised.

It doesn’t work … I have NEVER seen it work.

I really don’t think there is any time that Quantum Law is more important and more vital for us to get right than when we are dealing with the challenges and heartbreak we are suffering with our children.

Quantum Law is so within, so without.

What does that really mean? It means ‘be the change you want to see’. I think it would be fair to say that we want to see decency, respect and integrity from our children who are hurting us.

This means that you need to be this for yourself for this to show up outside of you as your experience in your experience – from anyone you are struggling with, including your child!

What would decency, respect and integrity to ‘self’ look like?

Let’s go back to Laurence and Emily. To Laurence these things would mean getting money for board and bills, and to only accept non-abusive communication. Also to lay down boundaries and time limits that Emily would need to honour otherwise she would need to move out.

We may not realise at the time that maybe it is our own guilt we are pandering to, or the fear of our children not loving us, rather than thinking about the consequences of enabling our children in their stuckness. Emily wasn’t getting well any more than any of our children do when we leave things the way they are, hoping something will change.

Quantum Law is absolute – nothing changes in your experience that isn’t pleasant until you change who you are being in the dynamic. Laurence wasn’t changing. He was doing the same thing – trying to make Emily change whilst he wasn’t loving and respecting himself.

How was she ever going to love and respect herself and him when he, as her parent, wasn’t being this for himself. She wasn’t and couldn’t. She continued smoking, drinking, refusing to work and contribute, and being abusive towards his father.

Because Laurence was being abused and drained of his lifeforce and resources, he got sicker and sicker. He started drinking as well, to numb out his pain. He couldn’t expand on his business ideas, and had unsuccessful dating experiences, all because he couldn’t be present and healthy in his Life as a result of Emily’s pressure and demands.

This is the deal with our adult children – if we allow them to stay sick we get sick and we drown with them.

There is only one way out and that is to lead the way. And it is only after we do this that we then see if they are narcissistic or not.

In the cases of my son Zac and Emily, they were never going to get well the way things were and neither were Laurence and I. However, I am so happy to report that Laurence and his daughter finally understood what I did.

It was several years after my situation with Zac that I helped Laurence get very clear on what was necessary. This is what I told him, ‘When you know that loving and respecting yourself is the most important thing here, then Emily will have the chance to move up and join you. Otherwise it can never happen.’

Laurence did a lot of work on himself with NARP to shift out of his terrible feelings of guilt and obligation, as well as the fear of losing Emily altogether. Then he calmly and clearly told her she had a month to get a job and that she would need to pay for board and bills from this date on.

She didn’t take him seriously and when the date came, Lawrence told her calmly and clearly to pack her stuff and leave. She called him every terrible name she could think of. He held his ground and did not capitulate. Emily moved in with a girlfriend, who naturally was not going to put up with paying Emily’s way.

Emily got a job in a café within a week. Every time she asked Laurence for money he said ‘No’. Emily stopped drinking and smoking and started saving for the things she needed and wanted.

Today, only three years later, she works as a successful graphic designer in her own business that she loves. She and her father have a great relationship.

When Emily moved out, Laurence said he would hang up or refuse to talk to her if she was abusive – and he did. Two years ago Emily thanked her father profusely for setting those boundaries with her and has apologised liberally for her past behaviour towards him. She loves and respects her father immensely. His door was always open to her when she was being like that!

Emily did a complete 180 degree turn on the way she used to treat her father, because he loves and respects himself.

Absolutely Laurence had to go through a great deal of discomfort and pain – he had to keep holding his boundaries and continually let go of his guilt and his wanting to rescue her. Look at the results – just as it was with my own son Zac. Walking our truth powerfully and calmly, and keeping working on ourselves inwardly with NARP, created the solid healthy inner and then outer template for our children.

Our children often follow and develop into where we go. Emily may have turned out to be narcissistic if Laurence had continued with his own powerless, co-dependent behaviour. As it turned out both he and his daughter ended up being whole, healthy, self-generative people.

Honestly, as parents it only takes us to lead the way.

 

When Your Adult Child Is a Narcissist

I do know many people within this community who devastatingly have suffered a child who is narcissistic. In the case of your adult child being this way it can be terrible, especially if they have children as well. Many a grandparent has had the grandchildren used against them horribly by their narcissistic adult children or step-children.

I want to share with you this story about Jeanee and David whose adult narcissistic daughter Marina was abusing them terribly.

Marina would use her parents constantly for babysitting duties for her four young children. Jeanee and David loved their grandchildren but struggled greatly with their daughter’s demands, accusations, anger and inconsistencies.

Often they went through the gut-wrenching times when Marina would threaten to never let them see the children again. The children, whilst in their grandparent’s care, would tell them what terrible things their mother had said about them. This broke their hearts, especially as Marina expected them to do so much for the grandchildren – things that she wasn’t taking responsibility to do herself.

There was never gratitude, just abuse for their love and efforts.

When Jeanee contacted me, she said that Marina had been difficult all their lives, and now that these four precious babies were in the mix as well it was literally killing her and her husband. I convinced Jeanee that the most important thing for her and her husband, as well as her grandchildren – and even Marina – was for her, Jeanee, to lead the way and get well.

Jeanee worked with NARP, letting go of the trauma within her that Marina was inflicting. She also did healings on her husband and her grandchildren by proxy. Jeanee felt calmer and more confident with what she was dealing with, and saw a bigger picture that she was working towards.

Jeanee started laying boundaries with her daughter, requesting she contact them ahead of time to make arrangements and to end the last-minute demands. And Jeanee stopped allowing her love for her grandchildren to allow her to be manipulated and abused. If they missed a doctor’s appointment or didn’t get to school on time, that was not her responsibility.

At times it broke her heart not jumping to Marina’s attention for her grandchildren, but she understood that often you have to lose the battle to win the war – and she was determined to be the model of love, truth and integrity that she wanted these little ones to become in their lives.

The inevitable happened. With the boundaries she set came Marina’s nasty efforts to rip the boundaries down. That didn’t work and so the next, quite common, thing happened – Marina pulled her trump card on Jeanee telling her she wouldn’t see the children again.

Through a torrent of tears Jeanee shared this with me, and I kept lovingly bringing her back to the Quantum Truth of so within, so without. I said, ‘If you look after emotion first, if you release all of this trauma from inside, the space opens up for positive and healthy change.’

Jeanee got to work, and that is exactly what she did. She got stuck into her NARP Modules daily to keep upholding her truth and strength. A week and a half later Marina contacted her asking her to look after the children. Jeanne responded by saying she would send Marina an email laying out the limits to this – the healthy boundaries Jeanee needed to have respected to be a part of Marina’s life.

Jeanee got an abusive email back from Marina, but rather than reply Jeanee went inwards again to release what this exchange had brought up within her. Two days later Marina sent her an email agreeing to the boundaries.

Jeanee to this day has to walk a determined line with Marina, and has also had to let go of any expectation of having a healthy and happy relationship with her. However, she sees her grandchildren regularly and she and her husband have them during school holidays for extended periods of time, which they love.

The grandchildren are all so much healthier since Jeanee’s shift, and I have no doubt that their grandmother’s dependable, empowered role modelling of aligned values, truth and respect is calling them to follow.

Can you imagine if this hadn’t happened? They would have had even more role models of trauma, powerlessness and victimhood.

 

The Ultimate ‘Lose It All To Get It All’

I remember once hearing the expression about enabling others to hurt us and take from us, is like watering their lawn whilst ours turns brown and dies.

Not only are we not teaching them to be self-generative and inwardly fulfilled, we are killing ourselves in the process. The truth is, if we stay sick and are sick in any dynamic, we are not in a position to help anyone and we only contribute to the toxic sickness.

In Emily’s case, Laurence had to risk her failing at looking after herself and leaving him for good. But something spectacular happens when necessity becomes a driving force – people step up. Something else extraordinary happens when we start to love and approve of ourselves and actualise what that really is in real-time – key people in our life start to love and approve of us unconditionally too.

In the case of Jeanee and Marina, Marina didn’t want to have full responsibility for her children. She needed her mother and was going to treat her as badly as her mother would allow it. When Jeanee no longer allowed that bad treatment, it stopped. More than this – as it is for all of us – when we release the painful trauma of the losses of those and that closest to our hearts, and reach the full resolution of being the example we wish to be, live and see in our world, calmly and lovingly, then we often receive these people and things back in our life.

Gosh, it’s huge. And when our children and grandchildren are concerned it takes everything we have – but what choice do we have when we break it all down and understand the deeper layers of the Quantum Truth of all of this?

If we want to be healthy and have a healthy world, and for our future generations to be well, there is nothing else to do but heal ourselves and lead the way.

So, I hope that this TTV had helped grant you some goals, direction, and power regarding your difficulties with your adult children.

Also please know there are beautiful people in this Community who have had no option other than to let go and go No Contact with their children. We may think that this would be a trauma that would destroy us, yet I promise you that the people working with NARP who have made this decision have been able to get to peace and free themselves to live their full lives. Such is the extent of detoxing from trauma that NARP creates.

It ALWAYS comes back to the same thing – heal ourselves and then all that is healthy can and will follow. We can’t make other people healthy – we can only lead the way by being that ourselves.

Is that clear – does it really make sense?

If so, I want you to write: ‘If my mission is my healthiness, then I inspire all of life in the healthiest of ways.’

If you are ready to make your inner and then outer worlds healthy, for you and your future generations, join me by clicking this link. Today you can start a deep dive into the step-by-step proven formula to make this happen.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And as always, I look forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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How To Ignore A Narcissist Who Tries To Punish You

How To Ignore A Narcissist Who Tries To Punish You

 

When a narcissist acts up – it can be brutal! They say and do things that are conscienceless, malicious and horrifically nasty.

Believe me I KNOW how hard it is NOT to react! I used to FIGHT BACK nearly all the time.

But it didn’t work.

And I know, like me, that your reactions don’t bring RELIEF or SOLUTION, and instead you just feel more broken and traumatised and like you are going mad.

This is why learning how to IGNORE a narcissist is not just healthy; it may even SAVE your Life.

 

 

Video Transcript

Narcissists are nasty people. They know – specifically – how to get to you.

We know this – you have been through it or are going through it. The absolute devastation of getting hit with such low blows that you can’t help but be triggered to react.

And we may think we are sticking up for ourselves and that we are not letting the narcissist get away with it by reacting. But no positive results are forthcoming.

In fact the more we react, the more we hand power over and the more the narcissist gets the feed to keep punishing us.

I will go as far as say when you continue to react you are putting yourself in such critical positions that it could empty you all the way out to your demise. It could literally take you all the way to the end of your life as you know it – and even your life itself.

This is why learning how to ignore a narcissist is one of the most powerful tools you will ever have. Not just to save your life, but also to render the narcissist powerless and to create the room for your real, abuse-free life to begin.

Today I’m going to give you everything I’ve got to both empower you and give you the confidence to do this.

Okay, so before we get started I want to remind you that if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Let’s start with one of the greatest motivations you could ever learn regarding the narcissist’s disordered psyche…

 

Being Ignored is the Narcissist’s Greatest Fear

To combat narcissists effectively begins with understanding that their model of the world is not the same as ours.

Narcissists do not wish to obtain togetherness, harmony and solution – they are all about getting narcissistic supply. This means the attention that allows them to know they are ‘significant enough’ to exist. Attention from others coupled with other people’s BIG emotional content and focus, to the exclusion of all else, grants the narcissist A-grade narcissistic supply.

To the narcissist this means: ‘For good or bad right now, I am the centre of your Universe.’

In contrast, if you have your own identity, interests and life, then this is a great ego injury and so the narcissist needs to pull you off these things and back onto them.

Of course, at times the narcissist will feign ‘care and niceties’ to get your energy and focus back, but if that isn’t working or appropriate for them to do, then it will be whatever and however your attention can be harvested. Targeting and smashing your weak points, the things that hurt you the most, is a powerful way to achieve this.

If and when we heal, no longer react, let go and finally exit this crazy and painful game of keeping attached to someone who is sucking our life-force and continually retraumatising us, then…

We deliver the most terrifying reality to the narcissist: ‘You no longer exist or have any power over me.’

Let’s check out EXACTLY how to get there!

 

Realise the Truth About ‘The Punishment’

When we haven’t yet healed our own Inner Identity to the point of actively knowing – ‘It isn’t important what other people think about me or do; it is important what I think about and do.’, we hand our power away to life and others rather than being in our own power centre.

If we are not yet safe and anchored in our own bodies about our truths and values, and are still dependent on other specific people validating and approving of us, we can be targeted and punished by others. We then live by the false and dangerous premise of ‘My life is dependent on how this person thinks about me and treats me.’

Oh gosh, don’t narcissists get their hooks into us in this place? Just like a lion can attach to an injured gazelle at the edge of a pack.

We may not have realised that we are always teaching people how to treat us and love us. When we allow abuse by staying around to receive it, no matter how much we may jump up and down about it, what we are actually saying is, ‘that’s okay’. Whatever we tolerate DOES and WILL become our reality.

Narcissists are highly intuitive beings who find and belt up on people’s unhealed wounds. The same narcissist will punish people differently depending on the person. In the case of one of my ex narcissists, he punished me with engulfment and control and constant accusations. He was always stalking me and micro-managing me. However, his next partner experienced him detaching, disappearing and throwing other women in her face.

How interesting all of this is!

My inner subconscious wounds concerning love were: ‘People who love me control and judge me and don’t trust me.’ Her inner wounds were: ‘The people who love me leave me for others.’

I would never tolerate for a millisecond someone who went missing in action and threw affairs in my face – so of course, he would never have used this tactic to punish me, keep me coming back for more, and extract narcissistic supply from me.

And I know one hundred percent that someone like her would never have tolerated being stalked and smothered for a moment either.

Is the penny dropping? Are you getting this? It’s vital you understand, otherwise you will always be looking for your solutions and healing where it simply does not exist.

Why on earth would you even consider trying to work out why and how a narcissist is punishing you, when he or she is plasticine and can morph into any shape or person to fulfil the quest of obtaining narcissistic supply?

The answers, solutions and healing can only be obtained from inside of you. It’s the only place relief and solution exists, and you do this by working out YOUR wounds, what the narcissist is triggering off within you, and then healing them.

This is not about blaming ourselves or saying, ‘Okay, so if I didn’t have wounds the narcissist can’t punish me.’

If you didn’t have wounds you would not be with a narcissist – you would have flushed out him or her and detached yourself as soon as the abuse started. You would say, ‘not my reality’ just as I would have if I had had women thrown in my face (and what the next women would have done with someone engulfing her). If we don’t have wounds on the topics narcissistic use nastily against us, we just DON’T PLAY!

The only reason we stayed connected was because we had wounds specific to our past and emotional injuries that the narcissist could hook us and hurt us with whilst extracting narcissistic supply.

When we have done the inner work to be whole and anchored in our own body and clear on our values, truth and Self, we don’t tolerate anyone loving us any less than the level we treat ourselves.

Is the narcissist’s motivation, and the part we play, clearer to you today, perhaps more than ever before?

This is NOT about the narcissist. This is about healing ourselves and taking our power back so that we no longer connect with people who will destroy our lives, hearts and souls.

If you do get this, and you are past the ridiculous notion that healing ourselves and taking our power back is about ‘victim blaming’, I want you to write below ‘I get it. My salvation is not about the narcissist, it is about healing ME!’

Now let’s get onto the physiological reasons why ignoring the narcissist – making it NOT about them but all about you – ABSOLUTELY equals taking your power back.

 

Self-partnering – The Essential Connection Back to Self

At first we may be motivated to ignore the narcissist because we know that this hurts them a lot more than trying to ‘make him or her get it’, ‘be accountable, atone or apologise’ or ‘pay for what they have done’.

Please know all of these things – trying to bring a narcissist to justice – are fruitless and re-traumatising unless you have detached, healed and are simply living your truth with powerful boundaries and in no way needing specific outcomes in order to be ‘whole’.

So we may be settled on the idea that ignoring the narcissist is the best way to hurt him or her the most, and at first this can help you do this. But truly, if you use ‘ignoring the narcissist to self-partner and heal yourself’ as your greatest motivation, before long you truly won’t care less about what the narcissist is or isn’t doing.

The relief and healing you feel will make you incredibly motivated to keep going with what you are now engaged in – namely love and dedication to your own development, healing and growth. You will start to feel the love and wholeness you have been searching for your entire life, just in all the wrong places.

As Dr. Bessel Van Der Kolt, the world’s leading expert on trauma, tells us: to start moving into safety within our own Being and away from trauma reactions only happens when we take our attention inside us. This activates the areas of our brain associated with ‘interoception’. Dr Van Der Kolt believes that we can’t get the parts of our brain that can integrate and heal from extreme trauma as well as anxiety, depression and feelings of powerlessness – all synonymous with narcissistic abuse – on line if we don’t go within.

I totally concur, and as myself and so many Thrivers have discovered, it was when we took our attention off the narcissist and fully turned inwards to make it about healing and rescuing ourselves from all the horrific traumas activated by narcissists, an incredible transformation, emancipation and liberation occurred within ourselves and then in our outer lives. And this is exactly what the healing power of NARP facilitates for us.

 As Pema Chodron famously said, ‘If someone comes along and shoots an arrow into your heart, it’s fruitless to stand there and yell at the person. It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there’s an arrow in your heart…’

This is where it is crazy, thinking that focusing everything we have on narcissists and not ourselves is going to help. It doesn’t. It just keeps us bleeding out and our lives further disintegrating. Such is the path of victimhood.

Okay so you may say, ‘Sure Melanie, but how can I detach and ignore the narcissist when my life is fully under siege; when the things and people that I care about the most are under threat?’

Okay, let’s look at this.

 

The Power in Letting Go and Letting God/Source/Life Take Care of Things

For most mere mortals, like me and you, initially it is almost impossible not to react to a narcissist’s cruel behaviour when the punishment CLEARLY does not match the supposed crime. Especially if you are like me, a high-powered, passionate person who has specific beliefs about life and others, and how people should treat each other with integrity.

I used to be one of those people who HATED injustice vehemently. For me, to sit back and shut my mouth when something was blatantly ‘wrong’, ‘unfair’ or ‘ridiculous’ was unthinkable.

But I learned, oh boy I learned, that this righteousness, when it comes to narcissistic abuse, is totally Wrong Town.

Rather than ‘me’ trying to control, fix things and bring the narcissist to justice, I had to learn to step aside, let go and let a Bigger, much more Intelligent, Force than me take over.

You may want to accuse me of being all woohoo or even religious, or trying to get you to have blind faith in ‘another’ power. What I am talking about here – for me anyway – is Quantum. It’s not just ‘Source’, it is your ‘Higher Power’; it’s the Field that you are intrinsically connected to.

Quantum Scientists like Dr. Joe Dispenza and Brice Lipton are on the forefront of helping us rise from our previous victimhoods into our Quantum Power, by showing us that when you address your subconscious, which as Dr. Lipton states is processing 40 million bits per second as opposed to our conscious mind which can only process 40 bits per second, that we are working with the most powerful processor of all that is connected to all of Life in our experience as our Life.

This is where narcissistic abuse pushes us to step out of doing Life the way we used to – ‘from the outside in’ believing that Life was happening ‘to’ us instead of ‘through’ us – to discover the powerful Quantum Creators we really are. And what this means is that when we address and change our inner beliefs and programs, then we change our emotions, our feelings, our actions and our world.

We also signal the entire Field differently in the way that it responds to us. We start to access trajectories of experiences and opportunities that we simply didn’t have access to before our inner shift.

Finally we understand the truth. That the way our subconscious was programmed meant that unconsciously we would collude to ensure that these programs played out to the letter. Because that is the purpose of the subconscious – to fulfil the physical, lived reality of the inner program. That is until we awaken and go within to address the very core of what is really going on – which is ALWAYS inside of us.

Myself and so many others have discovered, usually because we have tried everything else to no avail, that when we let go of what the narcissist was doing and trying to control and went inside to meet and release the trauma and the terror within, triggered by the narcissist’s punishment, that not only did the trauma and terror go, the narcissist’s terror campaign also dissolved into nothingness. They stopped being able to do to us what they were previously doing.

It may seem like a miracle – yet it’s Quantum Law – so within so without. When we change our inner state FIRST, then the outer MUST follow.

With everything I have seen over the last ten plus years, I know narcissistic abuse is an energetic phenomenon that can only be addressed this way. It’s the only way we can properly detach, heal and break free for REAL.

And, maybe like me it took a lesson so hard and absolute as narcissistic abuse to truly find your real Quantum Power and change your entire life beyond description for the rest of your Life.

That is exactly what the path of ignoring the narcissist and fully turning inwards to yourself, incredibly and magnificently, produces.

And don’t for one minute think that this means you will be lazy and won’t act or protect yourself or get your life going – that’s not true. Because when you do clear the trauma and get safe and powerful in your body, then all that energy that used to be bound up and crippling you with trauma, is freed up and available for powerful creation – regardless of what the narcissist is or isn’t doing.

That is when you enter and become your own personal nirvana and powerhouse of life-force.

That is Thriving.

Are you ready for this? Have you had enough of being enmeshed in the punishment of narcissists and the punishment of your ongoing thoughts and obsessions and trauma – if you have already got away?

If so, enough is enough. It’s time. Join me to learn a better way to heal your Core Identity – a powerful, direct way that REALLY works. You can start accessing this information and true relief today by clicking here.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And, as always, I am so looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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How To Stop Playing the Narcissist’s Game – And Win

How To Stop Playing the Narcissist’s Game – And Win

 

There is nothing more frustrating than trying to make a narcissist accountable, responsible and behave like a decent human being.  We try everything to make life happy, peaceful and sane but nothing works.

We are looking to have a game of friendly croquet in a deadly hell zone with machine guns, rocket launchers and missiles – all designed to hit hard and render you powerless enough to be fully controlled and to hand over what the narcissist requires to feed their insatiable False Self.

Most of us, like my former self, have no idea WHAT the narcissist’s game is and why we will never win at it.

However, in today’s Thriver TV episode we are going to peel all this back to firmly understand the narcissist’s game as well as what our TRUE game is and how to make sure we WIN our rights, happiness, values and truth back.

 

 

Video Transcript

Is there anything more frustrating than having a narcissist beat you at every turn?

The more you try to make them see sense and decency, the less they do.

The more you try to hold them accountable, the more it’s your fault.

The more you try to stop them doing obscene things, the harder they do them.

Why don’t your efforts work?

Truthfully – it’s because you are playing the game the WRONG way! (Believe me, initially I had no idea either!)

Today, all of that changes because you are going to discover exactly what a narcissist wants and how to cut them off from it and create your life healthily and FINALLY win.

Not possible you may say!

I promise you it is not just possible, it’s inevitable, and today I’m going to show you how.

Okay, so before we get started, I want to remind you that if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Let’s get going…

 

The Narcissist’s and Our Respective Games

The narcissist’s game is simple – drama, attention, significance, dumping emotional agony onto others and belting them up for it.

Nothing pleasant really…

How did we get caught up in this game?

The answer is we combined our ‘game’ with their ‘game’.

This is OUR game – love, togetherness, peace, happiness and joy – these things are nothing like the narcissist’s game. In fact, in an interior landscape, which is firmly about ‘self’ and ‘how to be superior’ at all costs, these things don’t even figure to a narcissist. These are not desired results for their life and certainly they don’t fit into their pathological ego construct.

These things only diminish narcissists. It makes them ‘usual’ and ‘normal’ and incredibly vulnerable to the annihilation of the False Self into harmony and peace where they can no longer remain separate and significant.

So for starters, we are looking to have a game of friendly croquet in a deadly hell zone with machine guns, rocket launchers and missiles – all designed to hit hard and render you powerless enough to be fully controlled and to hand over what the narcissist requires to feed their insatiable False Self.

Here there is no lush green lawns; no sipping Pimm’s and enjoying club sandwiches.

And it doesn’t matter how much you try to make the narcissist settle into a healthy relationship, play nicely or care about you. It’s just not possible. This doesn’t supply what the narcissist wants and needs – the attention and drama to stop them sinking into being with and feeling their True Self wounds; the trauma of being defective and not good enough as themselves to get their needs met. Hence why the narcissist completely divorces his or her own self-assessed ‘pathetic, damaged’ True Self – which is how they really feel about themselves – and created a False Self in its place.

It also doesn’t matter how shot up, bleeding and writhing in agony you are whilst trying. The narcissist is not going to come and pick you up, love you and stop hurting you. He or she would rather throw you under the next oncoming tank.

You see, the narcissist has been projecting on to you those parts that the narcissist hates about themself, and unconsciously has been trying to kill off your Being in an attempt to annihilate their own disowned projected Self.

You are the enemy.

So, therefore, if we REALLY want love, togetherness, peace, happiness, and joy, WHY are we in this war zone experiencing horrific brutality and treatment when we know our life and everything in it that matters to us is being ripped to shreds?

It truly doesn’t make sense – well not logically anyway.

Let’s investigate deeper.

 

We Don’t Know Better

Logically we may believe or know there is better. We know that other people experience love, happiness and being treated well by others. So why are we still connected to someone who is NOT these things?

It may seem like we see glimpses of the lovely person – we think they have the capacity in some sense to do the right thing. They may have turned on the crocodile tears and granted us many promises, and other people may have even given us hope about them.

But I really want you to KNOW this is NOT why you are hanging in there.

The reason all of us have been or are stuck in war zones with narcissists is because our inner subconscious programs are still a match for pain and trauma.

We have believed our game is love, togetherness, peace, happiness and joy – and absolutely we want these things – but could we really handle them if they arrived?

According to Quantum Law, so within, so without, this is all very difficult for us to obtain when our subconscious programs regarding love and relationships are painful, conflicted and messy – resembling that of, well, quite frankly, a battlefield.

Let me explain to you what I mean with my own story.

Like many of us who have been narcissistically abused, love and relationships were often a minefield for me. I went through painful, addictive, adulterous relationships – where I chose partners based on ‘attraction’, who weren’t healthy relationship material.

After doing a lot of personal development, I ‘grew up’ enough to be much more sensible in choosing love partners. But then I chose people who had been ‘bad’ in their past, yet professed to ‘now’ be evolved, spiritual and ‘changed’.

I believed them. After all hadn’t I been less than sterling in my ‘lost’ years?

Anyway, the drama came up, as did the pain, the highs and lows and, of course, so within, so without, the two greatest narcissistic relationships came into my life when I professed black and blue that I wanted peace, love and harmony in my relationships.

However, when I started doing the inner work, I discovered these following things that HAD been keeping me in the narcissist’s hell game.

I found normal, non-edgy people boring, just as I had grave trouble just ‘being’ with myself in a state of peace, low-ebb and tranquillity. In fact, my levels of still-existing ‘crisis-consciousness’ had made me so obsessive-compulsive and highly anxious that I literally believed if I ‘stopped’, ‘rested’ or ‘wasn’t doing something’ that my whole world would cave in.

How this state of being manifested consciously in my life was ‘always needing to be busy and industrious’ and ‘not having time to nurture and be kind to myself’. I know many of you relate.

The warzone of narcissistic abuse fulfils crisis consciousness perfectly. It grants us a JOB of being busy in damage control, ALWAYS! It wasn’t until I went deeply inside with NARP Modules to find and release the traumas generating these anxious states of myself that I was able to just ‘be’.

Phew, I am now so much more able to play croquet!

Okay, then there was the matter of ‘significance’, which is one of the dire rules of engagement in the battlefield with a narcissist.

Before healing my deep inner programs, I never felt good enough or truly loved and appreciated. All my life I had wanted to be recognised just for being me, and I felt so insignificant and hurt again and again with all of the narcissist’s accusations and condemnations that I would fight for recognition.

Narcissistic abuse supplied that battle abundantly for me – it fulfilled the self-fulfilling prophecy of ‘not being good enough to be valued and loved’ that I was already immersed in.

Once all my old wounds that had existed way before narcissistic abuse were healed within me, I was able to unconditionally love and accept my own value and worth. Before, however, there was no known way that I could have played croquet – the compliments and recognition there were too foreign, and therefore unacceptable, to me.

Additionally, there was the narcissist’s anger and malicious missiles hitting their targets and blowing me apart. Little did I know, until later, that my old traumas being triggered into fully blown activation with these attacks granted me the permission to retaliate – to dump my devastation and rage somewhere. So much so, that there were times when I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognise who looked back at me – I seriously doubted my own sanity and humanity.

It wasn’t until I was able to release the trauma of cruelty and abuse from my Inner Being, and all my panic, desperation and anger that was generated from these wounds, that I had zero desire to be participating in the war zone.

After healing me on all these issues, as well as many others, I realised that when we get better, we do better.

I left the battlefield and croquet became very enticing.

Playing the Right Game

The narcissist’s game is not our game. We don’t win at love, happiness and joy in war zones. We can’t, don’t and won’t beat narcissists on battlefields.

We beat narcissists and win at our Life by exiting the game and walking onto our green lawn no matter WHAT the narcissist does to try to pull us back into the mayhem.

How are we going to accept the lush healthiness of love, peace, harmony and happiness?

By changing and healing our inner terrain to healthy programs – which is what happens automatically when we target, find and release the trauma that has been subconsciously conscripting us to war.

Is that what you want? To get free of this rubbish?

If you are with me, write ‘I’m walking away to play croquet NOW!’ below.

Okay … so now that you have done that, I promise you this is not just a logical choice. It’s got to be so much more than that. It must be an inner powerful shift and I’m going to show you how to achieve it.

If this video woke you up and you know your True Life awaits you, join me on this side, where you will Thrive, by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And, as always, I am so looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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How To Flush Out A Covert Narcissist BEFORE It’s Too Late

How To Flush Out A Covert Narcissist BEFORE It’s Too Late

 

Maybe you know or suspect you have a covert narcissist in your life now and perhaps you are BEYOND TERRIFIED of experiencing another one AGAIN.

Covert narcissists are amongst the slipperiest and most dangerous, because they are the hardest of all to detect!

Yet…TRULY, it is NOT true that you are defenceless against them.

It is my greatest wish that this Thriver TV Episode will take away the fear of covert narcissists forever, and even excite you about your possibilities going forward…

 

 

Video Transcript

Today I want to expand on recent TTV episodes helping you empower yourself against narcissists, and in this video, I want to talk about how to flush out the sneakiest and most cunning of narcissists of all – covert ones.

These are the ones who slip through and take you in – cleverly and expertly. Think con ‘person’. People will tell you there are no defences against these people but there is – truly.

There is no way I am going to tell you what to look out for regarding a covert narcissist, rather I am going to tell you WHO to be.

And this is really important knowledge whether in love, friendship, family affairs or business. Thank God we have the way to recover from covert narcissists now, and those of you healing and rebuilding from this, just as I wanted, there is NO WAY you wish to repeat another relationship like this again.

So, watch this video today to learn how this is JUST not possible.

Now, before we get started, if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Now, let’s start learning how to flush out a covert narcissist before it’s too late…

I’m going to start backwards from the END goal and grant you all the stuff in-between to do this. And today is a workshop, where if you really are serious about empowering and inoculating yourself against this, I’m giving you some homework to do.

All the looking out for them in the world, may not allow you to spot one, and also if you are still unconsciously handing power away, even when things may seem a little off, your brain will organise itself around the still unhealed inner parts of yourself and make excuses as to why not to listen to or back yourself.

So, let’s start with the end goal which is looking at what it would look like to be impervious to the deceptions of a covert narcissist.

It would mean being secure enough in yourself to take your time to get to know this person, whether it be romantically, in a business sense or even a friendship. Meaning you do not let people fully into your heart, life, body, bed, bank account and resources until you have taken the time to get to know them.

And then when ‘stuff’ arises that is questionable, you get straight to the point, question this person, calmly and clearly without guilt or remorse, require accountability, honesty and proof regarding who they profess to be, and if you don’t receive the validation and truth and solidness that you need then you don’t proceed, let go and move on.

So the real questions here are – are you willing to take your time to get to know someone?

Are you able to stand up and speak up without the fear of the repercussions if necessary?

Are you able to say ‘no more’ and leave this person without trying to fix, change and hope to make questionable deals work?

These are the real questions and criteria (if you graduate) that make you TOTALLY impervious to any narcissist no matter how covert they are.

And the real question under all these questions is this … (which you may have heard me talk about at times) ‘Are you empowered enough to LOSE it all to GET it all?’

These are all your end goals. These are the only way you can ever, as a healthy adult, be the generator of your incredible life and FULLY get out into life without fear no matter what anyone else is or isn’t doing.

Let’s start peeling all of this back one at a time.

 

Taking Time To Get To Know A Person

This is the deal, narcissist – even cunningly covert – screw up. They have gaps, over-inflated egos, the inability to process delayed gratification, disappointment and not getting what they want healthily. They need to move things along whatever their agenda is, quickly, in order to get the energetic payoff of the energy expended on it. They have chinks that become obvious if you are assessing someone’s character and past and taking your time to ascertain them.

If you let someone move on you and in too fast, which is foolhardy anyway, and only possible if you are bewitched by someone’s love-bombing’, then you can be taken in. Otherwise you can’t.

This is where I want you to deeply self-investigate any gaps that you may have, emotionally inside allowing yourself to be love-bombed whether it be a friendship, love relationship or business deal, or by any narcissist in your life.

What I want you to do, is when doing this, is to take a few deep breaths and really connect with the feelings inside you. Please know your answers are NOT in your head, they come deeply from within your Inner Being. This is why the Thriver Way to heal is so powerful and effective, because we get to the truth of what is going on inside you and work with you there. This is the only way we heal from patterns that aren’t serving is and break through into becoming a New Self where Life and Love does work.

Start with this question:

‘With whom did I hand over my trust, love, sex, resources, time, efforts or money, quickly without getting to know the character of this person?’

Take your time to really be honest with yourself and write your answer.

Then let’s go deeper. I want you to ask yourself,

‘What did I think I would gain from them by trusting them so quickly?’

Again, be lovingly self-honest. Was it love and companionship? Was it a better life than the one you felt you were having without them? Was it relief from loneliness and sadness?
What was it? really tune in and feel deeper into this. And write as much about this as you feel compelled to write.

Now let’s move on to our next level of deep understanding and self-transformation…

 

Listening To Your Inner Voice When ‘Stuff’ Happens

Believe it or not, all of Life and your soul is designed to back your Highest and Best Life, and we GET the warnings we need. These come in the form of inner cues – but the greatest issue is that we have been so disconnected from our Inner Beings that we don’t trust them.

Narcissists know this, and when ‘stuff’ crops up with them – the usual cracks that all narcissists display, and/or we deeply feel in the form of ‘something isn’t right’, they will look you in the eye and know that most people – despite the inner warnings will choose to believe them.

Or if they need to take it to another level, they will have already identified an inner gap you have, such as fear of confrontation, inability to speak up, feeling like you don’t have the right to be heard, or feeling wrong when trying to be, and will guilt and confuse you out of investigating and finding out the truth as well as laying clear, non-negotiable boundaries.
We SO have to work our way past this.

This was huge for me. I was the person who liked to be humble, speaking up to me felt like grandstanding, demanding and I even felt like exposing someone that was ‘wrong’ was too uncomfortable and horrific to do. I much preferred to brush things under the carpet and just hope for the best.

Now I know how deadly that is. That pattern in my life nearly killed me. We really need to agree, after being smashed and nearly destroyed by narcissists, the price is way to big to pay to keep doing this. If you are with me on this – and you are ready to stand up and stop doing this – write in the comments below – The price is TOO big to play! No more!’

Not long ago I had a massive graduation on this score. Someone in my life delivered a BIG pathological lie that was a narcissistic betrayal. I didn’t have proof. They tried to guilt me out of my questioning for answers. I trusted my gut and investigated and caught out the deception. Then more lies came, which I again investigated to discover more deception. I obtained this knowledge by questioning people about the person’s purported activities, who knew this person and got my evidence – without being worried about what these people may think. The health of my soul was more important, and I was thrilled to know this person had no place in my life anymore (which I had suspected for a while) broke all ties and applied block and delete.

Also, not long after that, I had an event when my gut fired, and I wasn’t sure about someone else’s claims in my life. I told them I would check this out for my own benefit – and if they had not supported this, our deal would have ended there and then. It all checked out and I was able to proceed to the next level with them.

If there are times where I feel uneasy, I will do all that I can to back myself, have the necessary difficult conversations and know that real people are not threatened by this, when it’s done with love, authenticity and self-honour.

So really this is a huge area of a minefield for us – because of the fears of C.R.A.P., being the fear of criticism, rejection, abandonment and punishment if we speak up. The old me was in dire straits with this – I didn’t speak up or investigate or stand up for my rights at all. I had to do a lot of work on my Inner Being with this, which many of us after narcissistic abuse must do.

Our necessary inner reflection starts with these questions:

‘When I ignore my Inner Being – why do I do that?’

‘What am I scared about happening if I was to confront and speak up?’

‘Do I let people talk me out of investigating and following through to find out the truth? Why?’

‘When I discover truths that aren’t aligned with my values, do I self-abandon and make excuses? Why?’

Please know by connecting to your Inner Being lovingly and supportively and really feeling deeply into the true reasons why you have been stuck in these patterns, you will start to know what you need to work on to never be taken in by any narcissist again.

The truth is if you don’t do this work, then Life will keep delivering you one narcissist after the next, after the next, no matter WHAT you learn about them because these people are only catalysts; this is really about healing YOU.

Okay so now let’s look at this huge BIGGIE …

 

Leaving the Person and the Deal You Thought You May Have With Them

I’m going to cut straight to the chase here with a truth bomb.

The only reason we hang on to abusive people and hold them responsible for our lives is when we are not being the Source of what we want from them in our own lives.

I know so many of you may say, ‘But it’s not that simple, I have children, connected businesses and property. I can’t just leave this person’. The truth is hanging on doesn’t bring any relief, happiness or health. And many of the people in this community who did let go, despite enmeshments and even co-parenting, discovered that when they healed and rose into their power to be the Source to themselves and their children without reliance on the narcissist (who absolutely uses this as a hook against you) that the narcissist ceased to have power over them, and that they and their children fared so much better.

The real truth is, there are hooks that keep us connected and until we accept that these are the things that we need to turn inwards and heal within ourselves, we will cling to people who hurt us, and experience the same narcissist – or narcissist upon narcissist in the future.

I so hope you are getting this from a deeper perspective now. No amount of researching or learning about narcissists is going to save you from this fate. Only healing yourself ever does!

And we can be really deluded about this. I was. I thought because I was intelligent and capable that I wasn’t needy, empty and suffering survival fears. Yet I was, absolutely. I had shocking inner beliefs and traumas about there being something wrong with me if I was single, and also that I needed a man to survive.

I also had terrible fears of abandonment. It wasn’t until cleaning these up that I knew 100% no matter who it was in my life, I would leave in the face of abuse. And I have ended relationships, friendships, business deals and anyone who oversteps my boundaries and values. It’s clean and easy now because I don’t need anything from these people. Rather, I am now a firm and solid source to myself able to share my life with healthy others – but I can assure you it took much NARP work to get there. Thank goodness I did it! The relief is indescribable now! I barely resemble my Old Self!

Okay, so these are the questions, to ask yourself regarding this and close your eyes, connect with that deep inner truth of yourself and ask these questions.

‘What are /were my fears about leaving?

‘Why do/did I hang on, even when it is/was incredibly abusive to do so?’

‘What was it or is it that I don’t feel like I can provide for myself?’

Please know these questions will grant you some very valuable clues about what you need to heal, to never again hand you power over to people who hurt you. If you heal these inner parts up into a healthy solid inner adult, you will easily say when the abuse starts, ‘NO deal. And you are NOT my reality!’

Okay, so in closing this is all leading to being willing to Lose it All to Get it All.

Which means giving up the notion of Life the way we thought we were going to have it, when it clearly isn’t being healthy for us – and be willing to let it go, go empty, be aligned with our truth and values and let all of Source, Life and Creation itself deliver to us more of Who We Are BEING – which is what these forces are always doing.

What you will tolerate and accept is Who You Are.

What you already feel as warm and solid and complete as a feeling inside you is Who You Are, regardless of any real physical evidence of it yet.

THAT Is your organic state when you release and reprogram the traumas that are not allowing you to be this person.

Covert or any kind or narcissists have absolutely no part in our lives with this level of inner development.

Does this help?

Have you had enough of the pain yet of trying to work them out, the narcissists – instead of sorting yourself out– to change your life? If so, it is time for Thriver inner development, and I promise you it is incredibly liberating and fun and such a relief to do it. Your True Self and Life will start to glow and grow in time frames and ways that will stun you.

So, to get started click this link and join the thousands of Thrivers in this Community.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And as always, I’d love to answer your comments and questions below.

 

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How Narcissists Draw You In By Identifying Your Gaps

How Narcissists Draw You In By Identifying Your Gaps

 

A narcissist knows how to target you.

It’s no different than a lion sizing up an injured gazelle.

ESPECIALLY after narcissistic abuse, you need to KNOW how they do it…

As well as close up all your GAPS – the things they LOOK for that MAKE you susceptible to them.

If you are TERRIFIED of running into a narcissist again, this may be the most necessary TTV episode you have ever watched.

Video Transcript

Narcissists are very manipulative and they know how to draw you in and empty you out, sending you all the way to your demise.

People believe that narcissists can target anyone. So if you believe this, I really hope today will help you understand that they can’t.

Mind you, if you have been drawn in this is NOT about blaming and shaming you. I was too! What today’s Thriver TV is about is you identifying your ‘gaps’ and closing them firmly up, so that never again can a narcissist identify you as a target, hone in and ensnare you.

How does that sound?

I promise you this – when you become inoculated against narcissists, you’re free to be yourself, powerfully and radiantly in the world. No more hiding, shrinking and being scared.

What could be better?

Do stay with me on this today, because I’m going to take you through powerful, real-life examples to explain to you HOW to achieve this.

Okay, before I get started, if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, make sure you hit the like button.

 

Closing Your Gaps While Dating

Understandably, people are terrified to date again after being smashed by a narcissist.

So many people ask, ‘What if I get sucked in again?’

I really want you to know that dating, when you have these fears, is dangerous. This is because fear is a powerful magnet that draws to us exactly the experiences we fear. Fear does NOT keep us safe. The reason why is because our most important human soul lesson is to know that people outside of you are NOT responsible for your experience – you are. If you fear them, instead of being solidly you, then life will show you HOW you are not being solidly you.

If your beliefs are that sharing a meal and a glass of wine with a narcissist means they can trick you, draw you in and start destroying your life, then you will continue to get what you believe. If you believe ‘This previously happened to me because I had gaps that I was unconscious about, however, if I shore them up this will never happen to me again’, then you don’t need to ever worry who you are sharing dinner with.

In fact, you will welcome the experience of seeing how DIFFERENT you are as your own powerful protector and healthy Source! How else will you have the confidence to know your life is firmly in your own hands and isn’t susceptible to others?

I know in my previous life I used to hand my weaknesses and victimhood (gaps) to narcissists on a plate. It was my ‘normal’ and I had no idea I was doing it.

One of the greatest mistakes that makes us as easy prey for a narcissist as an injured gazelle is for a lion is this: telling them about all ways that previous partners have hurt us. This is because it means all a narcissist needs to do is tell us how much they are NOT that person. Then we think we have hit the jackpot with this person, whereas the narcissist is actually skilled in telling us what we want to hear.

If we do instant relationships and don’t take the time to ascertain someone’s values and character, we are playing Russian roulette with our soul and life.

Look at what happens when we discover that we are hooked to someone who is not a nice person, who doesn’t have our best interests at heart, and who doesn’t even have the resources to be healthy – we lie to ourselves that we are ‘in love’.

Real love has certain criteria to even be possible, and without these requirements love is obsession, addiction and toxic rather than genuine.

Likewise, if we try to be everything that we think someone else needs and wants in order to be loved and accepted, then we are not being real and are hugely susceptible to being matched up to a False Self – a narcissist.

Yet, if we are firmly in our body, anchored in our values, self-love and self-acceptance and take our time to see if people match our values and truths, we no longer accept and try to change people who aren’t compatible into people who will make us happy.

Rather, we will be content to wait until the right match comes along.

Let’s imagine a few different scenarios:

Craig is on a date with Amber. She looks and smells great and Craig finds her to be stunning. They start a sexual relationship very quickly. Amber is a narcissist and starts abusing Craig and draining his resources. Only a few weeks into the relationship already Craig is hooked because of the great sex and he doesn’t believe he can meet anyone as attractive as Amber.

***

Then there is Scott, who is on a date with Joy. She wants to move things along very quickly. Scott knows that sensible women, who honour themselves, take time to ascertain men. Anyway, he’s not interested in sex without feeling and connection. He refuses to sleep with Joy, wanting to take his time to get to know her. Joy, after a couple more dates when Scott will not capitulate, sends him a text accusing him of being gay and telling him he has lost the best dating opportunity he’ll ever have.

Of course, Joy was a narcissist needing to secure narcissistic supply very quickly. Scott dodged a bullet.

***

And then there is Georgia on a date with Darren, answering his intense questions about her life and her past. She replies with how disappointed she has been with men not making her a priority, and how this hurts her. Darren looks her in the eyes, leans over and says, ‘Any man would be honoured to have you in their life. These men were stupid; they had no idea what they had.’ Georgia’s heart fills with love and joy – just as if she was a parched woman in a desert finding an oasis and taking a deep drink.

At first the honeymoon period was amazing, but it turns into horrific rejection, abandonment, disdain and abuse. Darren was a narcissist who had quickly and expertly hooked Georgia in by pretending to be the saviour of her wounds. Naturally, he was the messenger of them, because these were her gaps, her unhealed inner parts that he could abuse her with, while she clung on, desperately addicted to him and trying to make someone love her better THIS time.

***

Finally, there is Anna who is on a date with Peter. Peter asks Anna about her previous relationships and Anna explains to him how blessed and grateful she was for her journey, because of the work on herself and how it helped her love and accept herself and be free of her wounds.

Peter visibly seems confused. He says to Anna, ‘I’m the same. I have learned so much from my relationships. I love personal development and growth as well.’

‘Oh’, says Anna, ‘What exactly did you learn and from what experience? I’m all ears!’ Peter’s conversation with Anna showed he had no grasp of either personal development or taking responsibility for his own development or growth.

At the end of the night, when Peter asks Anna if she wants to catch up again, Anna answers, ‘I think not. Good luck with dating and thanks for an interesting evening.’ To which Peter replies, ‘You’re right, there isn’t enough attraction for me to see you again anyway.’

Anna was nearly crying with laughter when she got into her car. This was such a powerful graduation where she was punching the air with joy. ‘I just flushed out a narc EASILY. Yay!’

High five to her!

 

Closing Your Gaps In Family Relationships

Let’s have a look at how this translates in situations with people we already know, such as family relationships or friendships.

John is a married man, a grown adult with his own family, yet his father Gary controls him. Gary is always asking John to drop everything for him, and rather than show gratitude and appreciation, Gary constantly criticises and abuses him.

John is hooked, and even when his wife threatened to leave him because of money, energy and time drained on his father, he couldn’t stop jumping to attention every time Gary summoned him.

John’s unhealed wounds were responsible for these unconscious pulls; his entire life he had been trying to earn his father’s love and respect, but nothing he could do was ever good enough.

***

Gayle used to hand her power and time to her narcissistic sister Colleen. Colleen was a single mother and used Gayle for money and babysitting, and whenever Collen got a man in her life, she would use him instead, and dump Gayle like a hot potato.

Gayle was previously heartbroken, confused and wrung out, and she lived in hope that one day she would have the healthy loving relationship with her sister that she had always dreamed of.

Finally, Gayle did the work on her inner traumas regarding her relationship with her sister and released the hooks and pulls of responsibility and guilt that she’d suffered. Gayle stopped handing money over and, after the last discard from her sister, was very clear – without an apology, and respect, the relationship was over.

The relief Gayle felt by claiming her life, power and soul back was immense. When her sister tried to smear her, Gayle let go of that trauma. She had no need to try to prove anything, and just kept her eyes on her side of the road, continuing to heal and generate her own healthy life, letting go of anyone and everything that didn’t represent this.

Now, let’s look at the business side of things.

 

Closing Your Gaps In Business

Andrew is brilliant yet shy. He had incredible ideas, development processes and loads of money, yet he didn’t have the confidence to be a public front man. Andrew met George, a charismatic salesman, through joint friends.

Over a few drinks, Andrew shared his dreams with George. George’s ears pricked up. He looked Andrew intently in the eyes and assured him he could help him with contacts and connections.

Andrew felt the relief of ‘Finally someone with the confidence and persona to help me’ and he and George joined forces. Twelve months later, after George disappeared with half a million of Andrew’s money, Andrew realised he had been conned by a sociopath.

Andrew didn’t take the personal responsibility to stop blaming George, and realise sensible adults do due diligence, check out people’s credentials thoroughly and draw up contracts and retain control and security along the way.

His lack of belief in himself had caused him to willingly, and far too quickly, hand complete power to George – which is what everyone, without exception, does to narcissists that abuse them.

***

Alice was a client of Jeanette’s when Jeanette shared her dream to open her own shop in a prestigious area. Alice told her she had the same vision and they should consider a partnership. After investigating Alice’s proposal, which Jeanette requested, Jeanette realised that she, herself, would be taking on all the risk and financing, and that Alice’s references weren’t credible.

After calling Alice out with the discovered truth, Jeanette never saw her again as a client and felt no loss at all.

 

The Absolute Formula To Not Get Taken In By A Narcissist

Now, let me condense these different scenarios and make it really clear cut for you.

1) Don’t express your weaknesses to people you don’t know.

2) Stop holding other people responsible for your life – such as believing you need to find someone else to fix, save or complete your life.

3) Don’t fall in quickly with people. Narcissists need a payoff of narcissistic supply rapidly for their expended energy. They will not hang around for your due diligence.

4) Know your values and retain your boundaries. Other people don’t need to get it – you need to get it.

5) Release your hooks and gaps within so that there is no more neediness, recklessness and emptiness driving your choices.

6) Be excited about every experience and opportunity which presents and strive to be your best self without any fear or concern about how other people are being.

It’s so important to understand that we all have patterns of behaviour and emotional hooks – unresolved wounds – in our life that have caused us to hand our power away.

As shown in these examples that I have shared with you today, Craig, Georgia, John and Andrew, as a result of remaining unconscious, are stuck in historic patterns indefinitely with no sign of relief, growth and change. Narcissistic abuse is an ongoing soul lesson for them – until they wake up.

Whereas, as a result of taking firm responsibility to be the generator of their own lives, Scott, Anna, Gayle and Jeanette are living on trajectories where their Life delivers them the same genuine support and authenticity with people and situations that they are showing themselves.

So, is this clear now?

Has the penny dropped?

Do you know the powerful way home out of narcissistic abuse now?

If this is not 100 per cent clear in your body, which is where it needs to be, then come with me while I help you heal your gaps and traumas that have made you susceptible. And, I promise you, together we will find them and release them, turning you into a boundary beast – firmly in your power, saying ‘narcissist who?’ because they will cease to have any power over you at all!

This journey starts by clicking this link.

If you are with me write ‘Boundary Beast!’ below.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And as always, I’d love to answer your comments and questions below.

 

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The Healer in Disguise – Spiritual Narcissists Explained

The Healer in Disguise – Spiritual Narcissists Explained

 

Spiritual narcissists hit HARD.

They devastate your belief, soul and life – and they do it under the most manipulative guise of healing you.

It’s BEYOND devastating.

HOW do they do it?

How CAN we stop it?

What is the incredible transcendence for us out of this?

Watch today’s TTV episode because I’m about to explain ALL of this … and more!

 

 

Video Transcript

In today’s Thriver TV I want to get right down to the gist of how spiritual narcissists operate and how they get their hooks into you.

I also want to deeply investigate how spiritual healers very easily get you to hand your power to them and how you can ensure that stops happening to you.

Also, I’m going to explain to you how even if a spiritual narcissist is not healing you, they are granting you the most incredible opportunity to finally come home to healing yourself.

If you have been abused by a spiritual narcissist, whether it be in love or in therapy or church, this is a must-watch video for you.

It will explain a lot.

Okay, before I get started, if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, make sure you hit the like button.

Let’s start by checking out the different types of spiritual narcissists.

 

Who Are Spiritual Narcissists?

They can range from church ministers and worshippers who have incredible scripture knowledge, through to Eastern and personal development gurus and an endless assortment of spiritual healers and followers.

The spiritual narcissist in your life may be a person who reads spiritual books and professes to be spiritual who is holding up their indoctrination to you, professing that you need to live by it. This could be any impactful person in your life, whether they are connected to a church or healing profession or not.

 

How Do Spiritual Narcissists Infiltrate Us?

Many of us have known spiritual narcissists personally and collectively. Only recently a prominent spiritual narcissist within the Catholic church has been exposed through the mass media.

Narcissists are all dangerous and covert in that they wear a mask appearing to be who they are not. Spiritual narcissists totally personify the expression ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’.

What is so insidious and horrifying about spiritual narcissists is that they exploit positions of trust. If we are not yet aware that the only true authority to how we connect and relate to people is our inner being, we can easily believe that someone else has authority over our life and soul – even when our inner wisdom doesn’t agree.

And so sadly, we can justify these feelings away easily believing spiritual narcissists; we hand over our power and put our soul in their hands.

A dear girlfriend and I were having the discussion the other day about how ‘Playing it safe, despite your inner cues that something is wrong, is probably the biggest recipe for being abused by someone.’

Spiritual narcissists absolutely capitalise on people doing this.

The twist in the story of abuse by spiritual narcissists is that they can appear to be our remedy, our guru and the person who will heal us. However, like any source outside of ourselves that is a substitute to our own wholeness, this again is a False Source. Like all narcissists do, they appeal to a gap within us and profess to be the person to fill it.

False sources come in two versions:
1) Temporary relief that never provides a true durable solution, or
2) Abusive substitutes that we get hooked on for our supposed salvation, yet they bring about our destruction instead.

 

Who Is With Spirit Genuinely and Who Is Not?

We may trust spiritual narcissists and hand our power to them because they have professed to be with spirit and therefore immediately seeming credible. Maybe we want to trust them in the hope they can heal us.

Beware of anyone telling you that they are the person who will heal you back to a spiritual oneness. They can’t – only you can generate that for yourself. Someone can only empower you to deeply partner with and start healing yourself – they CAN’T do it for you. Rather than getting you to follow them, a true spiritual healer will take you deeply within yourself for you to connect to your ‘self’.

If someone is fostering a dependency with you, you need to be extremely wary of their motives. Is it for your money, body, resources, energy or life-force that they are creating this symbiosis?

Someone who is with Source will encourage you to become your own sage and guru and a person who no longer needs them – and they dearly wish that for you. They will want for you to have a direct relationship between you and Source, in its purest form, because they deeply know that you are Source itself and can experience and know this for yourself.

They know God is within.

They know your salvation lies in YOU knowing ‘Who You Really Are’ – God/Source/Salvation itself.

If someone who professes to be spiritual is not helping you come to this authentic place of peace, power and truth, then in my humble opinion – narcissist or not – this is creating co-dependency and powerlessness within you.

 

The Healing Necessity (Message) That Spiritual Narcissists Deliver To Us

All narcissists, without exception, are teaching us an incredibly brutal yet powerful message about the necessity to be self-partnered and to be a Source to ourselves.

This doesn’t mean that our life is meant to be spent ‘alone’. It means that according to the absolute Quantum Law of ‘so within, so without’ that we need to become the inner template of how our life goes.

The true Source of power and wholeness comes through sourcing life directly through ‘Source,’ which is our Higher Power and Higher Consciousness. I believe this is one and the same as our True Self, when we know Who We Really Are and cease handing away our power, truth, values and authority to outside influences.

When we are riddled with human trauma and false beliefs, we don’t trust ourselves. We may find it extremely difficult to have a solid connection to our inner innate wisdom – our Higher Self (God if you like) – which communicates to us in the form of emotions and intuition.

If we are in our head, disconnected from ourselves and self-abandoning this integral inner relationship, then we are prone to clinging to and hoping to receive support and love from others in order to be whole – but it doesn’t work.

This is metaphorically the lost, alone child trying to find a parent who will do the job properly this time, which doesn’t happen, instead of healing these parts within us ourselves.

As children we couldn’t be a source to ourselves and were hugely susceptible to abuse without defences to protect ourselves, including from spiritual narcissists. Yet as adults we can heal ourselves to be whole and self-actualised once we know what it is that we need to heal.

Rest assured, you will begin to understand what it is that you need to heal when you take your focus off what others are doing and have done to you and turn inwards to the traumas that are in your own being, traumas that you can release and bring Source into the space where they once were.

It is only when we believe we are not whole and are in some way defective and damaged that we go against our Inner Being, who is warning us by ‘not feeling right’. We second guess ourselves, hand our power away and get sucked into the web of the narcissists.

We are only traumatised and hooked – horrifically addicted – to someone, despite them abusing us, when we haven’t yet turned inwards to heal the corresponding fracture within ourselves.

The powerful truth about this process is: NO ONE can do that for you. It can only occur between self and self.

This ‘Self’ goes against the entire culture of the narcissistic/co-dependent setup that our entire world is based on – people feeling empty and traumatised on the inside being promised solutions outside of themselves to try to get better; and people who are inner black holes (narcissists) preying on these people by pretending to be the solution and then infiltrating their inner beings and sucking them dry.

 

The Remedy To All Of This

What is required here is a conscious shift away for the programmed lunacy of being told we are carnal, defective and not in God’s graces and need to earn our way back there, which we have all suffered.

We were additionally brought up by parents who also believed they were defective, carnal, soiled and had to earn love and acceptance. Insidious inner shame and deficient self-love and belief is a chronic human condition.

Such a programmed conditioning, coupled with a world steeped in an overload of toxic trauma and dire separation from Source, Love and Oneness, has meant that the toxic environment for spiritual narcissists has been able to flourish.

What is our remedy from all of this?

This… SEEK the God Within; BE your own guru; RELEASE your trauma and fill with the True Source Light that is your Source True Self, and see how you evolve into a force of love, truth and wisdom that exceeds anything you have ever known before.

You will no longer unconsciously be drawn into toxic relationships of symbiosis, dependency and narcissistic abuse, and you will inspire others to be free, authentic and filled with Source as well.

Something I hugely discovered in my journey of dire self-abandonment and not going within, is that I always sought experts, healers and therapists outside of myself.

I didn’t realise for a very long time that these people were my supplements and that they could never truly heal me; that the ongoing dependency of the management of my wounds, instead of truly healing them, or sustaining spiritual abuse that nearly destroyed me, was all for one reason – to push me back inwards to myself.

I learned the true Holy Trinity – myself, my Inner Being and my Superconscious (God) – and that it was when all these parts became integrated, which they naturally are when we are without our inner trauma separating us for ourselves, our Inner Beings and our Superconscious Self (and therefore all of Life and others), that I became whole.

More whole that I ever believed was possible.

Okay, if this makes profound sense out of all the nonsense we have been told, and if you want to find out more about how to meet your Inner Being so that you can integrate your Holy Trinity and your True Self and True Life, I’d love to show you the way home to you.

The first step is by joining up to my 16-day free course by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And as always, I’d love to answer your comments and questions below.

 

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Why Narcissists Inevitably Discard You

Why Narcissists Inevitably Discard You

 

A narcissist will always eventually, one way or another, discard you. It doesn’t matter whether you leave, they do, or how the relationship blows up.

One of the hardest things to come to terms with is this:  the narcissist doesn’t care about me and can live without me.

We experience this from their words and actions, lack of understanding, non-existent empathy, accountability or remorse regarding what they have done to us.

We discover that our feelings and life mean nothing to the narcissist; he or she may even hate us now and be hell-bent on trying to destroy us.

My heart goes out to you if you are still suffering the trauma of this, because truly until we heal from this, the trauma is unspeakable.

However, it is my greatest wish today that this article will not only explain why the narcissist will always discard you but also the deeper truths that will help grant you relief, healing and the power to move on and create real relationships with people who do have the resources to genuinely care about you.

 

The Shock of Narcissistic Discard

Falling from the dizzy heights of being idealised is such a heavy shock.

We may have believed that we were the narcissist’s ‘everything’, and certainly this appears to be the case in the love-bombing stage of the relationship and reappears when a narcissist is hoovering us back into their clutches in order to retain us for narcissistic supply.

What we may not have realised until much later, is that we were ‘necessary’ to the narcissist, but not as a flesh and blood human being with a soul and feelings. Rather, we were the object to grant them their addiction – their feed of energy, significance, resources, sex, money and/or any attention that allows them to self-medicate themselves away from their inner screaming wounds of defectiveness and insecure feelings of insignificance.

A narcissist is never ‘in love’ with you, they are incapable of that. They are only ‘in love‘ with the feelings of relief you grant them from their inner wounds, no different to a heroin addict being in love with heroin. You are a necessary commodity, and therefore when you prove to be no longer useful to self-medicate with, the narcissist will immediately devalue and discard you and replace you with someone else who can fulfil that task.

The replacement person may have been groomed and waiting for quite some time, if not already enlisted in the narcissist’s life.

In relation to Family of Origin narcissistic relationships, as well as those with toxic neighbours, business partners, friendships or any other capacity – the narcissist’s involvement with you is all about what they get out of it. The narcissist seeks to make you responsible for tending to and dancing around their wounds, by using you to their advantage and scapegoating you as the person to blame for why they have such disgraceful and regular all-consuming negative emotions when their inner traumas are not being offset adequately enough with narcissistic supply.

This is heart-breaking when we understand that a parent, sibling, or some other significant person in our life is supposed to have the resources to be loving, supportive, empathetic and caring. The sad truth is, if a person is suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder, regardless of who this person is in your life, they simply can’t help being a narcissist.

When a narcissist discards you, things don’t end pleasantly and in a way that can be processed humanely. The methods of discard are brutal; you will be accused of all and sundry, possibly even being the narcissist yourself. The narcissist will assert that they were honest, loving and credible and that you threw their love away and acted with a lack of integrity and care for them. There will be zero responsibility taken for their behaviour, actions, words and lies, regardless of what you discover about what they have really been up to.

Once you are no longer adequately serving their False Self, you need to be completely delisted – meaning you will be smeared and discredited to anyone who will listen.

You will be dismayed to discover that there is no empathy, compassion or concern for your life now. In fact, if the narcissist can make you pay dearly for not serving their False Self adequately, by pillaging and raping everything from you that they believe they are entitled to (like a vulture ravaging a dying animal) this further vindicates their nasty insatiable ego.

And enough will never be enough – if you allow it.

All of this is shocking because YOU regard humans as human beings, not objects. You care about their heart and soul rather than objectifying or sexualising them and using them for ego feeds and agendas. It is unthinkable for you to be able to grasp how the narcissist operates.

We have to wake up …

The relationship was never about you, team or ‘us’, it was about being with a severely damaged individual whose thoughts and actions were always about them, without consciousness or remorse.

 

What Constitutes Narcissistic Discard?

We may think it is a narcissist leaving our life and never wanting anything to do with us again, but really this narcissistic delisting is something we experience over and over with a narcissist even when still attached to them.

We are discarded every time we are dismissed, deemed irrelevant, or dehumanised, which of course is part and parcel of narcissistic abuse. Narcissistic abuse tears up the very fabric of our soul, and our humanness – the place of feeling whole, valued and safe.

 

Why Must the Narcissist Discard You?

To preserve his or her False Self, the narcissist must deny and reject your True Self.

Deep within, your True Self knows it deserves honesty, team play, empathy and real love. The trauma screaming inside you is because you are not living aligned with your True Self. The emotional pain is the signal to tell you how far off track this relationship is.

If your needs, feelings and opinions were valued by the narcissist, this would mean that you would no longer be dancing around the narcissist’s wounds, pandering and catering to them.

This is why the narcissist will not listen to your grievances, take responsibility or value your feelings. He or she does not want to work towards solutions and harmony with you or amend their narcissistic behaviour.  They want you to stay asleep and keep feeding their egoic significance. Each and every time they hook you and you respond with any energy towards them, they achieve this.

You waking up, pulling away or starting to assert your own needs, boundaries and rights by no longer marching to their drum, or arguing with them or justifying yourself whilst trying to get the narcissist to change, stops feeding the narcissist.

Then they must discard you and move on to more fertile narcissistic supply.

This also happens when you became so sick, needy or emptied out that there is nothing left for them to gain.

Hopefully you can move yourself into the first category, and heal from this, so that you truly embody that to be discarded by a No-person is not about being betrayed and ditched by someone who was capable of love – rather it was a blessing, releasing you into a true life of loving yourself and now being free to  generate true love.

 

Deep Quantum Truths Regarding Narcissistic Discard

The horrible, never-ending and disastrous eventuality for narcissists is that all relationships with others will end up being discarded, discredited and delisted by them.

The real reason for this is because the narcissist has completely discarded themselves.

The narcissist has attempted to kill off their own True Self; they have disowned and divorced themselves from it and put a fictitious character in its place (the False Self).

When the deeply damaged, wounded and abandoned True Self emerges, the narcissist lines someone else up, projects their pain onto them and tries to destroy them, which unconsciously is all about trying to destroy their shameful True Self – the inner vulnerable parts that they have no desire to meet, heal and resurrect in order to become whole.

The narcissist does not relate to him or herself with empathy, love, kindness, vulnerability or self-honesty or self-soothing. Instead, the narcissists self-relationship is delusional; it operates in egoic and pathologically disordered ways, designed to prop up the False Self and grant this fragile insecure identity the feed of significance.

The narcissist has no resources to relate to you as a valued human with a soul, because people cannot grant what and who they are not Being to themselves.

When we realise this deeper truth, we can stop trying to hold narcissists responsible for caring about us and valuing us. They have NO ability to.

Which then leads us to our true liberation …

How can we take our power back by healing what we need to?

 

Healing Our Own Self-discard

We were all discarded by narcissists.

We all discovered that, we were not important to this person in the ways that we wish to be valued by those we love.

Where we can go so wrong is to try to force the narcissist to be like a normal person – to have empathy, care, compassion and real love for us. Now I hope that you can understand why this was never going to work.

Our salvation, healing and emancipation from the terrible trauma of a narcissist’s discard, only comes by turning inwards with self-inquiry, and then committing to the inner work to heal.

These questions are vital:

How have I discarded my own inner being, truth and soul by remaining attached to someone trying to force them to care for, value and love me?

Where am I struggling to be my own source of love, acceptance and support?

What traumas in my life have left me feeling so discarded – unworthy, unloved and unsafe – that I am repeating this with other incapable and damaged people now?

Have I had enough of painful relationships with toxic people, to turn inwards and heal my love trajectory, so that I can be healed and whole and access real relationships with other whole and genuinely loving people?

(How do you feel about these questions? Are you on this journey of self-healing yet? Are you ready to start? I’d love you to answers in the comments below.)

I promise you these are all the questions and conclusions that I came to myself when I took my power back and decided to take matters into my own heart and hands to heal this.

I used to experience relationships of continued abandonment – being thrown under a bus and being brutally and cruelly repeatedly discarded. These relationships impacted on me so severely I truly would have died if I kept continuing this pattern.

I knew I had to heal and uplevel myself into a healthy self-partnered relationship, one where I would never again discard or abandon myself, regardless of who anyone else was or wasn’t being or doing.

This is the work that I passionately encourage and help guide others to do, after narcissistic abuse, as a step-by-step process which to date has liberated thousands of people from over 90 different countries worldwide from the torturous trauma of narcissistic discard.

If you relate and you have had enough of the pain, I’d love to show you how … here

Maybe you’ve been reading my blogs and listening to my videos for a long time but have never taken the first step to start doing the real work – the inner transformational healing – that is so needed to heal from this.

If this is you, it’s time! You can begin working with myself and thousands of other thrivers in the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain (your whole real life) by doing so.

And as always, I am so looking forward to answering your questions and comments.

 

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What Makes Narcissists Irresistible And How To Rid Your Cravings For Them

What Makes Narcissists Irresistible And How To Rid Your Cravings For Them

 

The pull we have towards narcissists is OFF the planet!

Even when they are hurting us SO much that it’s literally killing us, we usually stay connected …

Hoping they will wake up … change … get it … and stop doing what they are doing to us.

But they don’t.

If we can’t stop the cravings for a narcissist, just like anything in our life that is destroying us, they continue to do so.

Piece by piece by piece.

So how do we release ourselves from the cravings?

How do we get away, stay away and get on with the creation of our healthy abuse-free lives?

In today’s Thriver TV episode, I’m going to explain the REAL reason why we have such intense cravings for narcissists, as well as share with you what no one else is talking about – namely exactly how to heal beyond these cravings and get free and well, once and for all.

 

 

Video Transcript

Have you been treated horrifically by someone and yet can’t let go of them, no matter how much you are being damaged and destroyed by them?

Have you been anguished about WHY you just can’t get away and stay away, and can’t seem to stop yourself trying to fix things and be with this person?

You are not alone. Ex-heroin addicts have told me that it is harder to give up a narcissist than it is heroin.

In today’s episode, I’m going to explain to you why narcissists are so addictive, and why they get their hooks into you in all-consuming ways, as well as why it is so hard to let go of your cravings for them.

And, I’m also going to explain exactly how the Thriver Way to heal will get you up and out of this severe addiction, no matter how much it’s had its hold over you. And, I’m thrilled today to explain to you how the Thriver Way to heal is the true solution to getting away and completely free from narcissistic relationships, in ways that no one else is talking about.

Now… just before we take this deep dive, I want to remind you to subscribe to my channel if you haven’t already and leave a Like if you enjoy this video.

Okay so to get started … today’s Thriver TV lesson contains stories that you may deeply relate to.

 

Being Invalidated and Abused

Joseph was brought up in a family with a narcissistic mother who continually shut down his opinions, voice, and dreams and guilted and bullied him into doing everything she believed he should do, namely cater exactly to her needs and wants.

When Joseph met Barbara, he felt an instant connection and desire for her. She seemed so lovely, beautiful and attentive towards him. Not long after their relationship started, Joseph discovered she was selfish and disinterested in his preferences, invalidated his opinions and belittled him in public.

Despite this hurting Joseph greatly he was convinced that he deeply loved her and wanted to marry her. He did this, and afterward, her controlling, nasty nature intensified.

 

Being Invisible and Dismissed

Then there was Angela whose father was always absent, and who showed her very little attention. Nothing she could ever do would make him spend time with her or lovingly connect to her. Angela’s entire childhood was spent trying to win love and approval from her father.

When Angela met Mike, she felt his interest in her and almost instantly started a relationship with him.

Not long after Mike was much less caring. In fact, he seemed to be losing interest and even pulling away. Yet Angela felt incredibly in love with him and hung on for any crumbs of love or attention that she could get.

 

Being Bonded to Our Wounds

Despite feeling incredible pain and anxiety, and even when Joseph and Angela’s friends and peers would view their relationships and wonder why on earth these two were putting up with the way they were being treated, Angela and Mike were mesmerised, making excuses and terribly hooked to their partners.

So much so that they couldn’t even begin to imagine having a relationship with anyone else, despite knowing how much anxiety and depression they continually felt.

As you are watching this video, I want you to check in with yourself now. Are you going through this too? Do you feel in love with, or as if you can’t disconnect from the person who is hurting you greatly? If so, pause this video, and please let me know in your comment below.

Okay, let’s investigate. What is REALLY going on here?

Why is this the usual plight of being in a relationship with a narcissist? Finding them completely irresistible despite their horrible behaviour, and when trying to leave them and stay away, finding the cravings to reconnect almost unbearable to not give in to.

There is ONLY one true answer for this … unfinished internal business.

And it has nothing to do with the narcissist. The narcissist is only the catalyst. It actually has everything to do with ourselves.

The unfinished business is our unhealed, underdeveloped wounds that create the continuation of our already existing traumas with the people we choose, who choose us, to continue playing these traumas out with.

Narcissists fit this bill exactly. They appear as being the bringer of the healing to our unresolved traumas. Yet as time goes on, we discover they are in fact the messenger of our wounds. They smash our unhealed parts so hard that what was once unconscious within us, that we were surviving in our life as our ‘normal’, becomes so front and centre and painful that it fully gets our attention.

With Joseph, his traumas generated from his childhood were, ‘I’m unimportant. To survive and minimise being damaged I must give the woman I love what she wants and vanish myself and my needs completely’.

Joseph’s Inner Love Code is set on this belief and superglued in place with a ton of emotional energy (trauma), which has cemented this belief in place.

As far as Joseph’s Inner Being is concerned, his chemical attraction to women will be exactly the match for that belief, and he will be as bonded, attached and addicted to such a woman as the ‘right fit’ for his Love Code, as any drug addict would with the drug that brings the reality of their self-destructive Inner Identity.

The painful choice and enmeshment with an abusive partner or a drug (or any substance or pastime that is self-destructive) is NOT the real issue. It is a symptom of something deeper.

If Joseph does somehow extricate himself from this relationship (generally only after horrid abuse), or if Barbara discards him, then his unhealed Inner Love Code will line him up again with another woman who represents the same belief.

Angela’s Inner Love Code of ‘the man I love abandons me, and I am unworthy of his love’ means that she is starving for love and attention, just as a parched woman in a desert is dying of thirst.

Naturally, as soon as she does receive attention, she is prone to attach frenetically, only to be bonded to a man who provides the same trauma that she experienced in her childhood. Again, her subconscious programming is extremely literal, it simply connects her to the people and conditions to re-create, over and over, the validity of her Inner Love Code to the letter.

Again, because Angela has a great deal of traumatic energy connected to this painful belief, it has a powerful life of its own within her Inner Identity.

 

The Craving For the Bringers of Our Wounds and How To Reverse It

The craving part that we all suffer with narcissists is this: Unconsciously we want a source of the same trauma to do it differently this time. And if we stay looking outwards, trying to lecture, prescribe, love enough, support, or use any method whatsoever to fix and change the person who is hurting us, we are hanging out in Wrong Town.

So, what is the answer to break the narcissist’s irresistible hold and our cravings for them?

There is only one answer, change our Inner Love Code.

How do we do this?

Firstly, let me assure you that you can’t do this logically.

Both Joseph and Angela may decide they deserve different treatment from their partners, yet no matter how much they THINK this, they will not have the inner resources to generate it.

The idea of who they need to be to deserve different treatment is not going to convert into real life anchored action because their feelings and thought processes are always going to default back to the inner subconscious programs, which some neuroscientists believe are controlling up to ninety-five percent of our entire life by the time we reach thirty years of age.

The brain follows the body! We can only ever think within the level of consciousness of our already existing trauma. Therefore, we make excuses, we suffer cognitive dissonance, and we keep finding all sorts of insane ways to keep handing our power away to abusers and enabling their abuse of us, whilst hoping they will change.

Our brain is always going to organise itself in a way that will agree with the validity and unfold more of the reality of our Inner Love Code.

Understanding this means we now know that the only change must happen within ourselves. The first step to achieving that is realising it’s the traumatic emotional energy connected with the belief that grants its life-force and power inside us.

Hence to change our subconscious beliefs, releasing the related trauma is the key! And this is why Quanta Freedom Healing, the healing component in NARP, was created to take us inwards to locate these traumas, load them up, release them and bring in Source, our super-conscious Higher Self to fill the space where the previous traumas were.

This creates a shift which heals what the logical mind has no ability to heal. This is exactly how I and so many other Thrivers in this Community have changed our Internal Love Codes.

 

The Shift From Trauma Bonding To Freedom From Abusers

Let’s examine Joseph’s Quantum Healing progress. Joseph came to NARP because he realised he was married to a narcissist and being terribly abused but felt powerless to stop loving her and let go.

Within two months of working NARP Modules, Joseph found his Inner Love Code original traumas and painful beliefs, released and reprogrammed them and started organically rising into his deservedness, power and boundaries. He stated what he would and wouldn’t tolerate any more to Barbara. True to narcissistic form she upped her ante and tried to smash him even harder.

Because Joseph was no longer stuck in his previous Inner Identity programs and had shifted to much more powerful self-honouring ones, his feelings of addiction and craving to her were completely gone. He now found her behaviour intolerable and unpalatable, and Joseph separated successfully from her with strong boundaries in place.

Now let’s check out what happened with Angela. She has been in therapy for years regarding her absent relationship with her father and her pattern of falling in love with unavailable men, yet felt powerless to let go of Mike. (It’s so important to understand that no matter what we learn logically, our Inner Being trapped in trauma remains set on a trajectory no matter what we think or even ‘learn’, hence why logical therapy is often completely ineffective for trauma recovery.)

After Mike went missing and made no contact with Angela for a week, and she suspected he was a pathological lying narcissist seeing other women, she joined up and started healing with NARP.

When Angela tracked the trauma she was feeling over Mike, back into her subconscious programs (which NARP teaches you how to do) she was able to find, release and reprogram her Inner Love Code. Not long after that she easily rejected Mike when he tried to hoover her back in.

Feelings of love and longing had shifted to feelings of repulsion. Because of her dedicated inner work with NARP, Angela was free of any attraction to Mike and KNEW deep in her Being that she deserved real commitment and devotion from a man, which he clearly couldn’t grant her.

Seven months later after easily and solidly rejecting some unavailable men whilst dating (which was her ‘graduation’ in REAL time), Angela met Gary who she is now married to. He is devoted, committed, and her Inner Identity easily accepts his love because this is a match for her Inner Love Code now.

Previously Angela could simply NOT have been matched up with a man like this. Her subconscious programs would never have permitted it.

Does this make sense? Is the penny dropping? I can assure you the acceleration in people’s healing, and recovery to Thriver status starts to happen incredibly when they get this, what I’ve shared with you today, and start working on their Inner Love Code with NARP to heal it.

To find out more about this, I’d love to invite you over to connect to my Thriver Community with my free 16-day course, which includes a free Quanta Freedom Healing with me, where you can start releasing the cravings and regain your life immediately. To get started, click the link this link.

And, if you liked this video, click the Like button, and if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And please share with your communities, so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And as always, I’d love to love to answer your comments and questions below.

 

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