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Narcissistic Rage Explained

Narcissistic Rage Explained

 

When you are on the receiving end of narcissistic rage it is SHOCKING, terrifying and confusing.

Do you feel like you are continually walking on broken glass?

And / or are being punished mercilessly for something that you have apparently done?

Find out what narcissistic rage is all about in today’s Thriver TV and discover a way to deal with it if you are the one in the firing line.

 

 

Video Transcript

Narcissistic rage can be terrifying. It can be hot or cold – meaning explosive or smouldering.

Either way, you know you are going to feel the repercussions immediately, later, or both. These are horrifying and heartbreaking, and so often seem senseless.

Today, in this video, I want to explain to you what narcissistic rage is, why it gets set off, and how to survive it.

However, firstly, I just want to take this opportunity to say thank you, everyone, who has subscribed to my channel and for supporting the Thriver Mission. And if you haven’t yet subscribed, I want to remind you to please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you give this a thumbs up!

Let’s get started.

 

The Fragile Narcissistic Identity

It can seem unfathomable that narcissists SO easily react with anger, defensiveness, the silent treatment, deliberate neglect, malicious insults and attacks.

These are all acts of narcissistic rage.

But why do they happen on a hair-line trigger? Why do narcissists take umbrage or respond in ways that most adults just wouldn’t?

It’s because their Inner Identity is not grown-up or healthy. Instead, it is severely stunted in emotional childhood immaturity with a False Self overlay.

Because of traumas suffered earlier in life, the narcissist has created a fictitious character as him or herself. Someone who is grandiose, special, above reproach and entitled to preferential treatment.

All of these identity constructs are necessary to protect the narcissist against how he or she really feels about their own Identity – damaged, unworthy and unlovable.

The ‘hair-line trigger’ is any comment, behaviour or action of another that penetrates and cracks this very flimsy False Self veneer.

When the narcissist is high on narcissistic supply and filled up, then he or she is more robust emotionally. Yet, if he or she is low on narcissistic supply and already suffering the bubbling up of their damaged inner Identity, without the self-medication of a feed of superiority from the outside, then the hair-line trigger becomes like a minefield, ready to explode with any wrong step.

It’s at these times that the retaliations of a narcissist, to any perceived emotional threat, is the most active.

 

Hot and Cold Narcissistic Rage

Hot narcissistic rages usually go off immediately, or very soon after, the apparent violation the narcissist suffered.

This person could be verbally and even physically abusive and threatening. The intensity of a hot narcissistic rage can be terrifying, and even disastrous, to everyone it affects.

Cold narcissistic rages are stealthier, premeditated and planned. Examples are the engineering of abuse by proxy or an elaborate smear campaign against you.

Being the recipient of cold narcissistic rage is the grave experience of being meticulously targeted for revenge. This can be drawn out, incredibly traumatising, insidious and hard to pinpoint and combat.

 

Hiding and Expressing Narcissistic Rage

Many narcissists are skilled at hiding narcissistic rage when they need to. Their life experience has taught them that allowing their true personality to erupt, or to sulk and be childish, does not procure advantages with new targets or people, who they are trying to actively manipulate or mine.

Narcissistic rages are more commonly unleashed on close intimates, such as family, lovers, spouses and maybe friends or work associates, who are in some way bonded, indebted or dependent on the narcissist.

It can be incredibly frustrating for close intimates to live with narcissistic rage on a regular basis, whilst the narcissist maintains such cordial and charming relationships with others.

In short, narcissists will rage at people who they have hooked to them and who hang around for it. Also, they may continue to attack people who they feel have insulted their False Self, even after separating with them.

Now let’s look at what can trigger narcissistic rage.

 

Denied Entitlement

The narcissist’s False Self needs to uphold being ‘more special’ than others.

If the narcissist is not the centre of attention when socialising, this can trigger a rage.

So can the narcissist not getting what he or she wants.

The narcissist’s demands, when unmet or denied, even if unreasonable, selfish, inhumane or totally warped, can trigger a rage.

An example could be you not stopping everything to greet the narcissist at the door.

If something or someone else is made a priority, it can bring on a narcissistic rage.

An example of this may be when someone else is ill and requires attention. Or the mentioning of someone else who is special, instead of attributing that title to the narcissist.

 

If Critiqued Or Questioned

The narcissist’s False Self, within its superior self-construct, is beyond reproach.

Even constructive suggestions to a narcissist can trigger a narcissistic rage.

Certainly, any form of questioning of the narcissist’s decisions, motives, actions or behaviours is stepping on very dangerous territory.

Trying to show or teach a narcissist something, often threatens their sense of superiority and so can trigger a rageful episode.

 

Made To Be Like Everyone Else

One of the narcissist’s greatest horrors is to not be the omnipotent being that their fictitious character needs to imagine itself as.

The huge gap between feeling ‘super-human’ and like a ‘normal-human’ gets closed with a thud, when the narcissist has to do the mundane, everyday things that every responsible adult does.

Things like: turning up on time, keeping your word, paying your bills and taxes, doing the right thing.

These deeds, unless providing narcissistic supply, are appalling to the narcissist. And if there is pressure enforcing ‘normality’, a terrible ego injury can occur, bringing on a narcissistic rage.

 

When Confronted

Narcissists absolutely screw up. They break rules and laws and pathologically lie. They cheat, manipulate, violate and abuse, and have no concern for how their actions affect others.

Naturally, people who are suffering the results of this are going to confront the narcissist and try to hold him or her accountable. This is one of the times when narcissistic rage will be the most obvious.

If you try to back a narcissist into a corner, he or she will come out swinging, using a host of out-of-bounds defence mechanisms.

The conscienceless arsenal that the narcissist uses cuts hard and brutally into your psyche, and leaves you feeling like you are being torn to emotional shreds. You feel like you are losing your mind.

Why is the narcissist so disastrous to your health at this time?

Because he or she is trying to switch the blame and is fighting with every available tactic to maintain his or her idolised image.

 

If Called Out

One of the most sure-fire ways to trigger the narcissist’s rage is to call him or her a narcissist. This never goes well!

If you try to lecture and prescribe to the narcissist about their damaged self, their wounds, their dysregulation and issues, then be prepared to be set upon.

The greatest threat to the narcissist’s False Self is for the charade to be exposed. You are inciting punishment and retaliation when you do this.

 

Warning Signs and the Flushing Out of Narcissistic Rage

After meeting a narcissist, they will hide the immature narcissistic rage part of themselves from you as long for as they need to.

So how do you pick it? And what are the warning signs?

Generally, it starts by you feeling in your own gut that something is not quite right. It could be a way they looked, a slight reaction, or a few words they said.

I have found that by asking people about their life and other people, delusions of superiority can be noticed. They may talk down about other people. Perhaps when you are out with this person, they treat restaurant staff with disdain.

If something isn’t right, it’s important that you question it. Get to the bottom of it, with solidness, poise and integrity. If you do this, I promise you the narcissist will be rattled and will unravel into defences that are immature and uncalled for. Or they will burst into a narcissistic rage right in front of you.

I share this following example often, because it is such a good one.

Some years ago, when on a date, my date was rubbishing his work colleagues. When he asked me how he thought our date was going, I told him that my values didn’t include talking about people in such a derogatory way.

I said it calmly and clearly without fear.

He then flew into a complete rage. A narcissist was well and truly flushed out, and I was overjoyed that I had dodged a bullet.

 

If You Are Being Abused With Narcissistic Rage

Narcissists use narcissistic rage to control and manipulate you; to make you acquiesce and do what they want, drop your boundaries and hand over your rights and power to them.

The narcissist is also using you as their dump master to offload their emotional trauma onto – their inadequacies, self-loathing and deranged inner feelings – to try to relieve themselves of them.

It’s vital that you stop trying to combat, fix or change the narcissist.

There is only one true solution to escape narcissistic rage and all the other abusive things that a narcissist does…

Detach.

Pull away and start taking care of yourself.

For you, this means healing all the fears and inadequacies inside you, which the narcissist has been ripping open and using against you to suck your life-force and keep you hooked.

When you do the RIGHT inner work, you will escape these hooks, breakaway, get well and create your Thriver Life.

You will also render the narcissist powerless in lining you up and continuing to make your life a living hell.

Which is exactly the work that I teach people how to do – it’s my mission in life to help get you there.

If you have had enough of narcissistic rage, don’t wait any longer, come with me and I’ll show you how to break away, heal and become completely impervious to the narcissist’s attacks.

We can do this together in my next Masterclass, which I have just opened up. The last one of these mega healing events had over 7000 attendees, and we had hundreds of emails during and after the masterclass telling us how informative, healing and life-changing it was.

Okay, so to start getting relief, answers and the healing you dearly desire, click this link to the Masterclass.  

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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The Healer in Disguise – Spiritual Narcissists Explained

The Healer in Disguise – Spiritual Narcissists Explained

 

Spiritual narcissists hit HARD.

They devastate your belief, soul and life – and they do it under the most manipulative guise of healing you.

It’s BEYOND devastating.

HOW do they do it?

How CAN we stop it?

What is the incredible transcendence for us out of this?

Watch today’s TTV episode because I’m about to explain ALL of this … and more!

 

 

Video Transcript

In today’s Thriver TV I want to get right down to the gist of how spiritual narcissists operate and how they get their hooks into you.

I also want to deeply investigate how spiritual healers very easily get you to hand your power to them and how you can ensure that stops happening to you.

Also, I’m going to explain to you how even if a spiritual narcissist is not healing you, they are granting you the most incredible opportunity to finally come home to healing yourself.

If you have been abused by a spiritual narcissist, whether it be in love or in therapy or church, this is a must-watch video for you.

It will explain a lot.

Okay, before I get started, if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, make sure you hit the like button.

Let’s start by checking out the different types of spiritual narcissists.

 

Who Are Spiritual Narcissists?

They can range from church ministers and worshippers who have incredible scripture knowledge, through to Eastern and personal development gurus and an endless assortment of spiritual healers and followers.

The spiritual narcissist in your life may be a person who reads spiritual books and professes to be spiritual who is holding up their indoctrination to you, professing that you need to live by it. This could be any impactful person in your life, whether they are connected to a church or healing profession or not.

 

How Do Spiritual Narcissists Infiltrate Us?

Many of us have known spiritual narcissists personally and collectively. Only recently a prominent spiritual narcissist within the Catholic church has been exposed through the mass media.

Narcissists are all dangerous and covert in that they wear a mask appearing to be who they are not. Spiritual narcissists totally personify the expression ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’.

What is so insidious and horrifying about spiritual narcissists is that they exploit positions of trust. If we are not yet aware that the only true authority to how we connect and relate to people is our inner being, we can easily believe that someone else has authority over our life and soul – even when our inner wisdom doesn’t agree.

And so sadly, we can justify these feelings away easily believing spiritual narcissists; we hand over our power and put our soul in their hands.

A dear girlfriend and I were having the discussion the other day about how ‘Playing it safe, despite your inner cues that something is wrong, is probably the biggest recipe for being abused by someone.’

Spiritual narcissists absolutely capitalise on people doing this.

The twist in the story of abuse by spiritual narcissists is that they can appear to be our remedy, our guru and the person who will heal us. However, like any source outside of ourselves that is a substitute to our own wholeness, this again is a False Source. Like all narcissists do, they appeal to a gap within us and profess to be the person to fill it.

False sources come in two versions:
1) Temporary relief that never provides a true durable solution, or
2) Abusive substitutes that we get hooked on for our supposed salvation, yet they bring about our destruction instead.

 

Who Is With Spirit Genuinely and Who Is Not?

We may trust spiritual narcissists and hand our power to them because they have professed to be with spirit and therefore immediately seeming credible. Maybe we want to trust them in the hope they can heal us.

Beware of anyone telling you that they are the person who will heal you back to a spiritual oneness. They can’t – only you can generate that for yourself. Someone can only empower you to deeply partner with and start healing yourself – they CAN’T do it for you. Rather than getting you to follow them, a true spiritual healer will take you deeply within yourself for you to connect to your ‘self’.

If someone is fostering a dependency with you, you need to be extremely wary of their motives. Is it for your money, body, resources, energy or life-force that they are creating this symbiosis?

Someone who is with Source will encourage you to become your own sage and guru and a person who no longer needs them – and they dearly wish that for you. They will want for you to have a direct relationship between you and Source, in its purest form, because they deeply know that you are Source itself and can experience and know this for yourself.

They know God is within.

They know your salvation lies in YOU knowing ‘Who You Really Are’ – God/Source/Salvation itself.

If someone who professes to be spiritual is not helping you come to this authentic place of peace, power and truth, then in my humble opinion – narcissist or not – this is creating co-dependency and powerlessness within you.

 

The Healing Necessity (Message) That Spiritual Narcissists Deliver To Us

All narcissists, without exception, are teaching us an incredibly brutal yet powerful message about the necessity to be self-partnered and to be a Source to ourselves.

This doesn’t mean that our life is meant to be spent ‘alone’. It means that according to the absolute Quantum Law of ‘so within, so without’ that we need to become the inner template of how our life goes.

The true Source of power and wholeness comes through sourcing life directly through ‘Source,’ which is our Higher Power and Higher Consciousness. I believe this is one and the same as our True Self, when we know Who We Really Are and cease handing away our power, truth, values and authority to outside influences.

When we are riddled with human trauma and false beliefs, we don’t trust ourselves. We may find it extremely difficult to have a solid connection to our inner innate wisdom – our Higher Self (God if you like) – which communicates to us in the form of emotions and intuition.

If we are in our head, disconnected from ourselves and self-abandoning this integral inner relationship, then we are prone to clinging to and hoping to receive support and love from others in order to be whole – but it doesn’t work.

This is metaphorically the lost, alone child trying to find a parent who will do the job properly this time, which doesn’t happen, instead of healing these parts within us ourselves.

As children we couldn’t be a source to ourselves and were hugely susceptible to abuse without defences to protect ourselves, including from spiritual narcissists. Yet as adults we can heal ourselves to be whole and self-actualised once we know what it is that we need to heal.

Rest assured, you will begin to understand what it is that you need to heal when you take your focus off what others are doing and have done to you and turn inwards to the traumas that are in your own being, traumas that you can release and bring Source into the space where they once were.

It is only when we believe we are not whole and are in some way defective and damaged that we go against our Inner Being, who is warning us by ‘not feeling right’. We second guess ourselves, hand our power away and get sucked into the web of the narcissists.

We are only traumatised and hooked – horrifically addicted – to someone, despite them abusing us, when we haven’t yet turned inwards to heal the corresponding fracture within ourselves.

The powerful truth about this process is: NO ONE can do that for you. It can only occur between self and self.

This ‘Self’ goes against the entire culture of the narcissistic/co-dependent setup that our entire world is based on – people feeling empty and traumatised on the inside being promised solutions outside of themselves to try to get better; and people who are inner black holes (narcissists) preying on these people by pretending to be the solution and then infiltrating their inner beings and sucking them dry.

 

The Remedy To All Of This

What is required here is a conscious shift away for the programmed lunacy of being told we are carnal, defective and not in God’s graces and need to earn our way back there, which we have all suffered.

We were additionally brought up by parents who also believed they were defective, carnal, soiled and had to earn love and acceptance. Insidious inner shame and deficient self-love and belief is a chronic human condition.

Such a programmed conditioning, coupled with a world steeped in an overload of toxic trauma and dire separation from Source, Love and Oneness, has meant that the toxic environment for spiritual narcissists has been able to flourish.

What is our remedy from all of this?

This… SEEK the God Within; BE your own guru; RELEASE your trauma and fill with the True Source Light that is your Source True Self, and see how you evolve into a force of love, truth and wisdom that exceeds anything you have ever known before.

You will no longer unconsciously be drawn into toxic relationships of symbiosis, dependency and narcissistic abuse, and you will inspire others to be free, authentic and filled with Source as well.

Something I hugely discovered in my journey of dire self-abandonment and not going within, is that I always sought experts, healers and therapists outside of myself.

I didn’t realise for a very long time that these people were my supplements and that they could never truly heal me; that the ongoing dependency of the management of my wounds, instead of truly healing them, or sustaining spiritual abuse that nearly destroyed me, was all for one reason – to push me back inwards to myself.

I learned the true Holy Trinity – myself, my Inner Being and my Superconscious (God) – and that it was when all these parts became integrated, which they naturally are when we are without our inner trauma separating us for ourselves, our Inner Beings and our Superconscious Self (and therefore all of Life and others), that I became whole.

More whole that I ever believed was possible.

Okay, if this makes profound sense out of all the nonsense we have been told, and if you want to find out more about how to meet your Inner Being so that you can integrate your Holy Trinity and your True Self and True Life, I’d love to show you the way home to you.

The first step is by joining up to my 16-day free course by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

And as always, I’d love to answer your comments and questions below.

 

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