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What Does The Narcissist Really Think About You?

What Does The Narcissist Really Think About You?

 

Have you ever asked yourself, “Does the narc even care about me?” Or “When are they going to contact me?” and “Are they sorry for all the chaos, heartbreak and terror they have caused?”

The REAL question we all want to know is this –  “What does the narcissist REALLY think of me?”

In this Thriver TV episode I’m going to deliver the truth regarding this question.

Remember –  the truth really will set you free.

 

 

Video Transcript

This Thriver TV may be hard for you to hear.

But it is powerful to understand this, and truly it will help you detach, pull away and heal.

It will also stop you going for and trying to get from the narcissist what doesn’t exist.

So, buckle in, and come on the ride with me – where the truth will set you free.

But before we start I want to thank you if you have already supported the Thriver Mission by subscribing to my channel, and if you haven’t yet, please do! Also, if you like this video give it a thumbs up.

Now let’s get going on today’s episode.

 

How Narcissists Think of People

If you don’t already know this – please know that how the narcissist thinks about you is NOT personal – even though it deeply feels as if it is.

A narcissist as a No-Self (not a functioning authentic True Self) does not connect to your humanity. You are not a flesh and blood person to him or her, you are an object; a necessary tool to use to extract and feed off narcissistic supply.

With the narcissist’s empty insecure inner self, he or she needs constant feedback, and the necessary attention to know that he or she exists.

At the start of the relationship you were likely to gush and supply tons of attention, acclaim and praise.

Then, as the relationship deteriorates, when anguished, triggered and abused, you react intensely and emotionally. This grants energy to the narcissist, which supplies them with the feedback, ‘I can affect another SO much, I DO exist, I AM significant!’

This is gold to a narcissist, just as much as gushing over them is.

In fact, it is a compliment to a narcissist to know how much someone is devastated, distraught and even suicidal because of them.

And in any capacity of a relationship with a narcissist, whether it be a family member, work colleague, boss, or friendship etc., the narcissist receives a hit of significance every time you dance around their wounds gingerly, take on their abuse as the dump master and try to appease, bargain, reason with or earn their approval.

ANY attention feeds their False Self.

Because the narcissist’s inner landscape is so drastically unconscious, when you are connected to a narcissist, their inner torment becomes your fault, and as far as he or she is concerned you deserve to be uncomfortable, distressed, paying penance or grovelling.

The narcissist’s catch-cry is, ‘If you pay for how I feel, then I will feel better.’ But it’s a bottomless pit, it never changes and they don’t feel better no matter how much you suffer.

 

How Can They Be Like This?

Please know our mind-set to start recovering from their abuse can’t be this – ‘Why are they like this?’

If you are trying to understand narcissists from a normal human construct, then you will be forever tormented by what they have done to you.

How they think is not normal.

It is not about mutuality, win-win or caring about another soul’s needs and feelings.

It is a complete one-way trip, all about the False Self, without the resources to BE different.

It is what it is.

When we Go Quantum – which is the only way to heal for real from narcissistic abuse – we understand the true nature of things.

This… that ALL relationships come from the integral relationship every person is having with their own Inner Being.

Narcissists HATE their own Inner Being profoundly.

They believe it to be insipid, powerless and ineffectual. This is why they purposefully divorced it, threw it to the side and assigned a False Self – a fictitious character – to take its place.

If this is how they view themselves, how do you think they COULD view you?

People can only engage with another, in the way they engage with their own TRUE Inner Beings.

You, like the narcissist’s Inner Being, don’t exist as a worthwhile or valued entity.

The narcissist is relentless with their own Inner Being – they literally despise its feelings and insecurities. They ignore it, don’t listen to it, refuse to have empathy for it, and will never hold, love or heal it.

It is only a ‘thing’ to be treated with contempt whilst they go after whatever it takes to self-medicate the pain away and try to feel worthy of being alive.

You, identically, are only being used as a tool to get stuff, acclaim and significance. The narcissist despises your real self, and finds it totally irrelevant and a pest yet needs you as ‘the object’ to get things.

It’s no different to how they really feel about themselves.

 

What Do You Really THINK of YOU?

This is where we start to turn this whole thing around – from the most horrible breakdown process of our ENTIRE life, to the profound breakthrough our True Self and Life was always waiting for.

It’s about waking up to these incredible truths we were never taught.

  • People do not treat us as we treat them. We accept and connect with their treatment of us at the level that we really feel about and love ourselves.
  • Our own level of love, approval, security and survival as adults, is not another adult’s job to provide for us – this is the relationship we must develop with ourselves. Then we will generate MORE identically healthy relationships.
  • We have the ability to be whole and healthy regardless of whether other specific people have the resources to love us or not.
  • There is an entire world of possible people to establish healthy relationships with, and our existence and survival is never reliant on abusive people getting their act together.

And ultimately…

  • What we develop as truths between us and ourselves is exactly the life that will start generating and laying boundaries of truth for ourselves, and will also determine the life that is no longer appropriate for us and that we refuse to continue engaging in. (That power was within us all along.)

I really want to share with you the profound understandings I had about myself that caused me to be the other half of narcissistic relationships and kept me hanging on whilst being HORRIFIED that he didn’t REALLY love me.

And what I knew I had to change and heal WITHIN myself if I was to have different relationships with people going forward.

I believed at some deep level:

  • I was wrong, bad and defective and didn’t deserve to be treated well.
  • I was forsaken by God because of the above.
  • Life was hard and I was always battling something.
  • If I didn’t do everything perfectly, I would be punished and penalised.
  • No matter how hard I tried I was not good enough to be loved.
  • I was not worth my own tenderness, care, and consideration, and instead self-criticised to force myself to take action with things.
  • My faults (insecurities and fears) were unacceptable, and therefore I needed to disown them, cover them up and pretend they didn’t exist.
  • When things went wrong in my life, it must be someone else’s fault, because after all my faults were always hidden and covered up. (I was totally a victim.)

I am honest about these things because I want to help you wake up, just as I did, and realise that this really isn’t even about the narcissist. And certainly, if you make it about them you are in Wrong Town with no way out of the pain.

Let’s all say this mantra together:

‘I now know how you think about me, it’s exactly the way I have been thinking about myself. And I know that when I heal my false beliefs and trauma that have been inflicted on me by people, by you, and even perhaps long before you, and by the human condition itself, I will no longer have any bond, feelings, and pain connected with you whatsoever.

Instead, I will have my evolution into a whole new relationship paradigm where I will connect, accept and have relationships with people who think about me the way I think and feel about me. As it has always been.’

Can you feel the way home?

Do you REALLY know what it is now?

Can you see the total ‘meant to be’ gift in this?

Do you understand this was always about your glorious soul and life evolution all along?

I want you to open the cells up in your Being and soak this in.

Let your cellular wisdom tell you the truth – it knows.

I want you to Re-member who you really are – that is what your coming home, coming back together is – remembering.

These truths are already coded into you, as the spectacular being that you are, waiting for you to awaken again.

Let me know how this feels in the comments below.

 

What the Narcissist Really Thinks About You Is Totally Unimportant

Do you understand now that we have been granting way too much energy and dependence on the narcissist?

I know it’s normal and excruciatingly painful to go through what has happened to you. But the utter truth is that he or she was a catalyst to help us wake up to the only foundational relationship anyone can ever have.

The one with themselves.

I promise you with all my heart that when you make your inner self-relationship your entire mission as the centrepiece of your life, you will not just get out of the torment and pain, you will come home to the greatest confidence, joy, life force and love that you could ever imagine experiencing.

It is so NOT true that narcissistic abuse leaves you forever diminished.

It is so NOT true that recovery takes decades and is gruelling.

In fact, when you have the process to find the exact false beliefs and traumas that brought this human trauma experience on unconsciously, and heal those, you will emerge evolved and free in ways and in a time frame that you could not even imagine yet.

Join me and I will I show you how this is possible, as well as connect you to the exact solutions to get the true inner work done.

You can do this by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always, I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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Don’t Fall For The Love Bomb! What It Feels Like To Date A Narcissist

Don’t Fall For The Love Bomb! What It Feels Like To Date A Narcissist

 

Narcissists like to love bomb! They like to shower you with gifts, turn on the charm and move things on very quickly.

When it comes to dating a narcissist how do you NOT fall for the love bombing?

How do you know the difference between love-bombing and real healthy attention and consideration?

Find out if there is a way to tell the difference between someone who is genuine, attentive and generous and a wolf in sheep’s clothing in this episode.

 

 

Video Transcript

What does it feel like to date a narcissist?

Heady. Exciting. Intoxicating.

(Before being healed up of course…)

How does all your sensibility go out of the window?

Why does it feel like you are on The Love Train Express, on a one way track, even though you sense there is something terribly dangerous about this?

Don’t real people show up as loving, genuine, trustworthy and caring as well?

You bet they do, and in today’s Thriver TV Episode I am going to explain to you what dating a narcissist is like, as well as what it is like to date a DECENT, loving and genuine person who is showing up interested in you and attentive towards you.

As well as HOW you can put this to the test!

Okay, before we get started, thank you everyone who has subscribed to my channel and for supporting the Thriver Mission. And if you haven’t yet subscribed, I want to remind you to please do.

And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Okay, let this episode begin!

 

The Feelings of Dating A Narcissist – When We Don’t Know!

What goes on with the narcissist and us when love-bombing happens?

The narcissist’s manoeuvre:

I’m going to try to hook up with this person. I’ll ask questions. I’ll find out what they are looking for and what they feel hurt about in their past. Then I’ll appear to care deeply about them and be everything they have been searching for.

The unsuspecting target’s feelings:

Oh MY GOD! This is the person I’ve been dreaming about, visualising and putting up on my vision board. He/she has arrived!

The narcissist’s manoeuvre:

I know this person is trusting and believes me. Now I’m going to snare this person quickly. I’ll take over their heart and infiltrate their body, soul and life. Heck, I’ll even connect financially with them as soon as they allow me to.

To get them to give me the key to the fortress, I’ll make them think I’m taking my time and have great respect for them. That is if sex and chemistry doesn’t get the better of them.

The unsuspecting target’s feelings:

Oh MY GOD! This person is everything I have ever wanted; I’m so attracted to him/her and he/she is so sweet and considerate. This is it – this is my beloved. There is no point wasting time, I know he/ she is the real deal and would never hurt me. I’m in!

(Mind you, this person’s intuition, their Inner Being, is dinging warning bells. Yet that niggly feeling is pushed aside by the over-enthusiastic reckless neediness to enmesh.)

The narcissist’s manoeuvre:

I’m SO high on new narcissistic supply that I am getting off on this. I know this person thinks we are crazily in love.

The unsuspecting target’s feelings:

Oh MY GOD! I feel so in love and attracted to this person I can’t even see straight.

That, in a nutshell, is a classic narcissistic love bomb. It is no more complicated than that – find out what a person craves and pretend to be it.

This is why narcissists get new supply in the time it takes to boil an egg.

The odd person reports that they didn’t feel head over heels when love-bombed. They didn’t feel the big chemical reaction to the narcissist – yet they still got hooked in because of some neediness within, like: ‘I’ll be on my own if I don’t accept this person’, ‘This person has the contacts, intelligence, wisdom, spirituality, money or lifestyle that I need to be happy, whole and safe’ and the list can go on and on and on.

It’s a hard pill to swallow, especially when we believe it is about ‘love’, that connections with narcissists are a dual interior subconscious game of neediness and supply. The narcissist NEEDS significance and someone else’s energy to survive, and we NEED what is missing in ourselves and our lives to try to feel whole.

Hence, why our connection with a narcissist ends up being as painful as anyone’s relationship is with a drug dependency that is killing them.

We don’t believe there is any other option than the narcissist, who originally appeared as our saviour to ourselves – until we realise that our entire lesson with narcissists is to let go, detach, turn inwards, heal and become a FULL source to self.

The narcissist who will never become a source to self believes that people are just objects and that they are dispensable sources, when necessary, that can be mined from virtually anywhere.

It’s true there are many unhealed people who feel empty about something on the inside.

 

Dating Fearlessly

Please hear me when I say to you – it is SO not true, that it will never be safe for you to date because narcissists are everywhere.

Yes, narcissists are everywhere – that is totally true, and so are great people who you can have healthy, fulfilling relationships with.

Your future relationships are never about what other people are or aren’t doing (oh gosh I promise you this).

Rather, they are about WHO you are BEING.

Beingness is not something you can just logically decide – it’s the work you do inside yourself to heal, so that you can show up, not CARING who other people are, because you know who YOU are, what YOUR values are and how powerfully (and not needily) you can take your time to get to know people and put yourself (and them) to the test.

I really want you to discard the ridiculous romantic notion that love is all about being swept off your feet into an instant relationship.

Fairy-tales, sitcoms, novels, plays, advertising and blockbuster movies have made us believe this – but truly, if you want to be safe, healthy and happy then you need to GROW UP and take your time when dating.

If you do, you have narcissistic repellent working powerfully in your favour from the get-go.

Narcissists HATE to take time; they need narcissistic supply to survive – like yesterday.

If you can get it through to yourself TO TAKE YOUR SWEET TIME to get to know someone, rather than be like my previous self who used to put more thought into buying a pair of shoes than I did into choosing a relationship, then watch on – because we are not going to leave any stone unturned.

Your Criteria to NOT Fall For the Love Bomb

I want you to ask yourself these questions:

  • Is your life whole enough, as a single person, to NOT need a relationship to feel happy and have a fulfilling life?
  • Do you feel like you are established as your own generative source of love, acceptance, survival and security – and no longer feel like an empty, broken child in an adult’s body looking for a partner to be a pseudo parent for you?  (I know that is such a tough question and one I want you to get really honest with yourself about – because it is NO one else’s responsibility to give you your happiness and life – it is yours.)
  • Are you healed beyond the beliefs ‘all the good ones are gone’, ‘I have to accept who turns up because there may not be another’ and ‘if I have a connection of (whatever it is) with someone, I may never experience that with someone else again’?
  • Are you healed and truly over the trauma of your past relationships?
  • Are you very clear on what you will and won’t accept and, so, will not compromise yourself because of neediness and feelings of lack?
  • Are you prepared to ask for what you need and want? And will you, respectfully without resentment, walk away if this person does not meet your values and truth, and accept that you are just not a match for them – regardless of what stage the relationship is at?
  • Have you evolved past the beliefs of ‘going on dates with the wrong people is annoying, terrible, disappointing and a waste of time’?
  • Are you healed beyond capitulating to other people’s demands even if it means you lose this person?
  • Are you able to accept someone discarding you because you didn’t go along with their version of dating (such as having sex too soon), without blaming yourself and wondering what is wrong with you?
  • Do you now accept that what comes up via dating grants you the perfect opportunity to heal beliefs and release even more trauma, show up in truth with healthy boundaries and become an even greater generative force of true, healthy love?

I promise you, I used to be a ‘No’ in all these areas. Today I am a ‘Yes’ because I know not just healthy love depends on it – my life literally does.

I worked my BUTT OFF with the inner work to get myself there.

Okay, so I’d love you to be honest and share with the entire community below – how many do you score a ‘yes’ out of these ten questions I just asked you?

I promise you this…until you stop dating trying to find someone to heal you, or deciding that you could never date ever again because you are too broken, and instead heal yourself in your key inner areas to become whole, not only will you date effectively, you will have a total blast doing it – no matter how many narcs you initially come across.

I also promise you that once the Quantum Mechanics of so within so without, get clear so that you are solid within and taking wonderful and powerful care of the sovereignty of your soul – the seas will part, the narcs will all get washed away, and great people will start flowing towards you.

Before then, you will be susceptible to a love-bombing narcissist. If you are starving or dying of thirst, you will eat crap on a stick or drink your own urine if you have to. With a narcissist who was originally wrapped in glamour, you’ll see that when the mask falls you will be left with the chilling truth of who they really are.

The total solution is to heal you, then you will never accept that again, and you won’t put yourself in a position to even start a narcissistic relationship.

When you heal, you will put as much thought, time, diligence and care into a relationship decision as you would any other impactful life decision – even more so – and certainly more thought than purchasing a pair of shoes.

The Difference Between Love-Bombing and Real Healthy Attention and Consideration

I love that I get to live so many experiences for myself AND this community.

Sometimes I feel like a crash-test dummy, in a good way!

‘Love’ has certainly been a journey for me, full of richness and experience, and I am very blessed to have enjoyed being able to have my heart open to receive new relationships even after narcissistic abuse.

EVERY relationship since the two N’s, has been a wonderful step up for me in certain areas.

You may ask what the difference is between decent caring people who are lovely and being love-bombed.

I promise you I KNOW the difference. And the reason I was able to enter a healthier relationship trajectory was because I was DIFFERENT enough to attract and accept this into my life.

My current partner of just over a year is a lovely man. From the day I met him, I felt a familiarity, a soft warm feeling. It was like putting on an old sweater that I adored. It was a feeling like ‘coming home’. It wasn’t the high anxiety, blood pumping ‘thrill’ of hanging out with a narcissist.

(Which for a long time I have been quite repulsed by!)

In the past, leading up to this man, I had been adamant about NOT being with men that were at all love-bomby! Because I knew how narcissistic that can be. I have to laugh about how the Universe says, ‘your wish is my command’ as I had been experiencing ungenerous relationships.

Meaning they were NOT romantic or caring, even though I was clear (previous love-bombing or not) with what I wanted, ‘I want romance. I want to feel like a revered woman. I want to MATTER!’

From day one I received flowers every time my partner picked me up on a date. He would send me beautiful thoughtful messages, including poetry. I was being beautifully romanced.

I still am to this day.

And I was totally allowing things to unfold whilst sizing him up, as well as evaluating how I was Being in this.

A dear girlfriend asked me ‘How do you know this isn’t love-bombing?’ My answer was ‘Because if I am busy and can’t get to his text, he waits respectfully until I do. And if I have other plans, and can’t meet up, he is totally understanding with this’.

This man was NOT needy, pushy, demanding or sulky. He was being a real romantic steadfast man. He respected my space and never encroached on it.

He didn’t play ridiculous ‘let’s throw caution to the wind in the name of passion’ games.

And, I was not giving up my life to completely fall into his arms. As it turned out, he didn’t want that either. We took our time through a friendship and courting process to get to know each other, as two whole people seeking another whole partner, to share a life with, rather than to self-medicate with or take away our emptiness and loneliness.

We remained platonically dating for three months before the relationship deepened.

In those three months, I watched and waited, as did he.

The other values I was very clear about included consideration for people, and one’s word being backed by real action, or taking responsibility if not possible (such as when stuff happens).

He has integrity. He is a really good person at his core.

I was clear on what character and kindness looked like and I was totally prepared to say ‘Okay, if he isn’t it, this has been a beautiful exercise in developing a relationship for both of us, and the next man will be even better.’

I truly believed that with all of my heart.

I still do, and if for whatever reason we decide our journey together wasn’t compatible with what we wanted any more, then that would all be totally okay too.

Right now, it is wonderful.

The Only Relationship That Creates All Others

I know there is a lot going on in this episode, and I hope that it can truly and deeply help you.

You know I am always banging on about the inner work, and that is because I know without it, after narcissistic abuse, just how hard it is to heal our fractured relationship with ourselves and life, let alone be powerful, solid and wise enough to engage in healthy relationships with a non-narcissistic intimate other.

What I love about truly cleaning up the relationship that we have with ourselves and feeling whole and satisfied in our own body and in life, is that we are no longer dependent and needy in relationships.

That is when we are TOTALLY free enough to choose and engage in ones that ARE healthy.

I can’t tell you what a relief it is to get there, and I know it will be for you too.

If it’s time for you to put an end to the narcissistic madness and fear, please click this link to start your trek on your true love path today.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released.  And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always, I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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How To Spot A Female Narcissist Before It’s Too Late

How To Spot A Female Narcissist Before It’s Too Late

 

Typically, narcissistic women will set out to snare new supply – by using their appearance and overt sexuality.

The narcissistic woman is deeply insecure and empty on the inside, and more interested in maintaining her looks and what she can get from people, than their feelings or needs.

She can be caring and cunning too – being everything you want her to be.

Discover more differences AND the similarities between female and male narcissists in this Thriver’s TV episode.

 

 

Video Transcript

This Thriver TV Episode is one you men want and may really need to understand – because many a narcissistic woman has been able to dupe a decent, generous, caring man, emptying him out of his emotions, resources and sanity.

But this episode is also applicable to gay women and both genders regarding both friendships and business matters.

Absolutely, female narcissists exist. Narcissism is not gender specific, and this is what Today’s Thriver TV episode is all about. So stick around to find out how to spot a female narcissist, as well as how to protect yourself from one.

Okay, before we dive in, thank you for supporting the Thriver Mission by subscribing to my channel, and if you haven’t yet, I’d love you to – and also please hit the like button if you enjoy this video!

Now let’s get started…

One For The Guys?

I know that some men think I only talk about male narcissists in my videos and blogs. Please know this is SO not true. Narcissism is narcissism and the behaviours are scarily similar between every narcissist, regardless of sex and who they are in your life!

Also, I want you to understand that the way to heal, for real, from any narcissist is identical.

This applies regardless of your gender, who the narcissist was in your life, and even how the abuse happened. In our wonderful Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program (NARP) Community, there are many men (straight and gay) healing from the devastation of narcissistic relationships – including of course with women!

So even though this TTV Episode may seem like it is one for the guys, it is for all of us, just as every publication I do is NOT gender specific.

Now let’s get down to it.

The Same Behaviour of Narcissistic Women and Men

The following is CRUCIAL to understand…

There are very few differences between the characteristics of narcissistic men and women, because when a person is operating from a False-Self interior they behave in almost identical ways.

And … I totally don’t want this TTV to be about demonising women, just like I am not in the business of demonising men. We need to understand that certain character traits are necessary to define a narcissistic person of any gender.

Just because a woman cares about her appearance does not automatically define her as a narcissist – just like a man who cares greatly about his professional image and financial success, as many women do too, is not automatically a narcissist either.

Now let’s look at the behaviours of narcissistic women that are IDENTICAL to those of men – including the one definitive distinguishing characteristic of a terminally narcissistic person – ‘I will NOT take the responsibility to meet and heal my wounds, and work on myself in order to change my behaviour and life.’

Both female and male narcissists, seeking people to mine attention, acclaim, sex, power, contacts, resources and the like, do these identical things:

  •  Size up their targets and know how to appeal to exactly what THAT person wants to hear and receive.
  • Fact finds a person’s weak spots (their insecurities).Offer support, validation, and care, which this person feels they don’t receive from others, and then turn the tables and start attacking these weak spots with criticism, nasty action and abandonment tactics.
  • Pretend to be supportive of the people, passions and things in your life, and then start discrediting and sabotaging them.
  • Need constant ‘ego-feeding’ with stuff, attention, significance and their version of respect and acclaim.
  • Punish mercilessly when the False Self is not fed adequately.
  • Do the push-pull game: ‘I reel you in and then I cast you out.’
  • Can take out masterful smear campaigns against you.
  • Are controlling, possessive and insecure, and react in rageful ways that mature adults simply don’t.
  • Can strip you bare emotionally, mentally and financially.
  • Commonly position the children against you and attempt child alienation.
  • Project blame and argue with you in circular ways that leave your head spinning.
  • Refuse to be durably accountable. Apologies take far too long if they do come, and then don’t hold weight or last. The narcissist continues to re-offend.
  • Harbour and keep bringing things up to punish you with – despite saying they were resolved in the past.
  • Play tit for tat – delivering punishments that do not fit the supposed crime (except in their own heads).
  • Make you feel you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. This person can never be appeased.
  • Toss you into the gutter without a second glance, when they cannot get what they want anymore or you have been emptied out.

Awful, isn’t it?

I promise you, in the ten plus years I’ve helped people from all over the world achieve Thriver Recovery, these things happen to EVERYONE at the hands of a narcissist – no matter the gender or the sexual orientation.

So, if you truly think that ONLY women do this, or you think the same about men, think AGAIN!

Okay, now let’s get down to the DIFFERENCES.

What Characterizes A Female Narcissist?

The things that I am talking about now are the typical narcissistic female characteristics. Mind you, not ALL narcissistic women fit this description.

Please note, in some cases I am describing the characteristic with ‘him’ being the recipient. Yet this applies to gay female narcissistic relationships also.

The most obvious difference between a narcissistic woman and a man is the way in which she will snare new supply – by using her appearance and overt sexuality.

In the case of heterosexual relationships, men are very visual and sexually enticed, and narcissistic women know that their attractiveness, being flirtatious and having a willingness to grant him sexual attention is a great asset. Naturally, this can and does also work with gay women.

(The same can be said for male somatic narcissists, gay or straight, who use their physical beauty to snare potential mates.)

Traditionally, the difference between narcissistic men and women is that highly effective narcissistic men will use power, success and resources to capture new supply because they know it works!

In a woman’s DNA, ‘security’ is attractive to her. In a male’s DNA, it is ‘procreation’ with a physically appealing mate.

Now, because a female narcissist is inherently a female, who suffers from security fears, as well as being intensely entitled, her target is likely to be a nice, successful, hardworking guy, who is generous to a fault and wants to be a good provider.

This suits her high-maintenance and very expensive lifestyle – granting her all the right products and accessories to maintain her ego-necessary beauty, as well as grant her the significance that her False-Self craves.

Maybe he doesn’t have a lot of money, but she is after something – connections or some sort of security; maybe even a free, temporary roof over her head, until she is on her feet and can find better supply.

It is very common for narcissistic women to upgrade from one partner to another.

The expression ‘beauty is skin deep’ applies. The narcissistic woman is deeply insecure and empty on the inside, and more interested in maintaining her looks and what she can get from him, than his feelings or needs.

All of this becomes more and more obvious after she has captured him.

Being Everything You Want

Regardless of whether a narcissistic woman appears in your life as a potential romantic partner, business associate or a friend, she will be charming and caring.

She will demonstrate how loyal she is – she appears to be committed and caring; a team member who has your back.

It is SOOO usual for her to go over and above the call of duty to show she cares about YOU as a PERSON.

Like all narcissists, it is an act.

It’s a powerful act.

She knows how to use her feminine wiles to incite people to care about her, as well as how to work out what role people want from her.

Is it someone with the smarts and credentials to help in business?

Is it someone to help look after children or loved ones?

What food do people like to eat?

What help do they want around the house?

What deep and personal thing do you need to talk to someone about and feel supported with?

Who can you call at any time of day to feel that someone genuinely cares about you?

In the case of romance – what are your deepest desires and fantasies?

It’s not surprising that the recipient of a narcissistic woman initially believes they have met the dream friend, business or love partner of their life.

She’s smart, capable, a wonderful asset to have around, and seems to genuinely love and care about you. Everyone in your life loves her as well. She makes certain of it.

However, like all narcissistic façades, the cracks appear – sooner rather than later.

The brittle, easily triggered, possessive, insecure creature emerges. She becomes critical, entitled, selfish and demanding.

Whoever lets this woman into their life starts becoming her emotional punching bag – bit by bit being blamed for her self-torment and anything that goes wrong (which is plenty).

The sad truth is this: a narcissistic woman (like narcissistic men) is a ’professional parasite’; a bottomless pit, who can never be made happy no matter what anyone gives her.

Are There Warning Signs?

This I want you to understand about narcissistic women (as well as ANY other narcissist you come across) – there are NO warning signs!

They show up appearing lovely, wonderful and genuine! But lovely, wonderful and REAL genuine people also turn up like this!

So, how DO you tell the difference?

I’ve said it before, and I will say it again – NO narcissist walks into your life, sticking their hand up announcing that they are a sociopath about to rip your life apart!

You recognizing a narcissist has NOTHING to do with them.

It has EVERYTHING to do with YOU!

I promise…

These are the relevant questions you need to ask yourself. Have you…

 Taken your time to get to know someone – their character and WHO they really are – before letting them into your life, business matters, home, heart, bed and body?

 Asked the difficult questions when things feel off?

 Requested proof and done investigative research on someone’s credentials if you DON’T fully believe them?

 Laid boundaries and said ‘no’ if a request feels uncomfortable to you?

 Kept seeing the people and doing the things that are your life, when a new person comes into your life?

 Got clear about what abuse is and what it isn’t?

 Confronted, stated your truth and stuck to it, even if someone has tried to manipulate you?

 Walked away from someone who is abusive, regardless of what hope you had for them in your life?

 Known your own worth and value, regardless of what someone else has or hasn’t been or done?

I’m going to be straight with you, if you can’t honestly answer these questions as ‘yes’ then you are susceptible to narcissists from both genders.

If you are honest with yourself – you will KNOW exactly why.

If you CAN answer these questions as ‘yes’, then NO narcissist will get past your boundaries. She (or he) will EASILY be flushed out or will disappear before risking something happening.

That is when YOU will have distinguished whether someone is a narcissist or not – BEFORE you get damaged. When you see them unravel in front of you or sneak off back into their shadows because they can’t both hang out with you and stay in the shadows at the same time.

Then you will say, ‘Oops there goes another one!’

If you aren’t in your power in this way, then the ONLY time you will spot a narcissist is when it is too late. They are already under your skin, entrenched in your life and creating havoc – like a terrible parasitical disease.

And you will only find out because their mask fully drops.

Do you understand NOW – REALLY? If so, I want you to pause this video, and let me know by writing, ‘I REALLY get it!’ below.

If you do the inner work, then you won’t care whether someone is a narcissist or not – because you will be a True Self; someone who is impervious to ANY narcissist – regardless of whether they are female, male or an alien!

I promise you I NEVER look out for narcissists. I couldn’t care less who is or isn’t one. No longer do I try to fruitlessly work out the other billions of people on this planet. How stressful, exhausting, traumatising and what a total waste of time that is!

All I have to BE is supremely authentic, truthful and powerful within myself. Man, it’s liberating. It’s awesome! It’s such a relief to just BE myself!

I got there with Inner Work, the REAL way.

The real inner work doesn’t take decades, and it’s not hard, gruelling and awful.

I promise you – that is NOT the truth!

My healing process to achieve personal liberation and power is direct and happens in record time.

Truly, your Inner Being can’t wait to be free of the pain and the crap you once believed!

So, guys and girls come join me to learn more about the true way to be safe, powerful and free from narcissists, by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always, I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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15 Things You Give up in a Relationship With a Narcissist

15 Things You Give up in a Relationship With a Narcissist

If you have experienced emotional abuse from a narcissist, it is okay for you to feel like you deserve better. It’s also okay to not know what better is, or what you deserve.

The post 15 Things You Give up in a Relationship With a Narcissist appeared first on Divorce Magazine.

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6 Possible Reasons the Narcissist Emotionally and Psychologically Abuses Others

6 Possible Reasons the Narcissist Emotionally and Psychologically Abuses Others

Narcissists emotionally and psychologically abuse because they are bullies. They destroy women, families, and children and cause grave harm because they are bullies.

The post 6 Possible Reasons the Narcissist Emotionally and Psychologically Abuses Others appeared first on Divorce Magazine.

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Preparing To Leave A Narcissist – 7 Things You Must Know

Preparing To Leave A Narcissist – 7 Things You Must Know

 

Leaving a narcissist can be terrifying. You know it’s not going to be easy and not going to go well.

Have you left and so have already suffered the threats and horror of what the narcissist is capable of doing?

Are you thinking of leaving, but the thought of it terrifies you?

These questions and more are answered in this video!

 

 

Video Transcript

Leaving a narcissist is one of the hardest things you will ever do.

For a start, you are NOT well.

It is likely that you are suffering from all sorts of anxiety disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Generally, at the time of leaving a narcissist, it’s because things are so traumatising that you have no choice.

Please know getting out is not the end of the trauma. In fact, it usually brings on an escalation of your traumas, which is why, today, I wanted to share with you the seven top things you must know when leaving a narcissist.

Okay, before we get started, thank you for supporting the Thriver Mission by subscribing to my channel. And if you haven’t yet subscribed, I want to remind you to please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you give it a thumbs up!

Okay, I want to start off with one of the most important things you need to understand regarding leaving a narcissist.

 

Number 1 Aftershock

This is one of the BIGGEST, if not the BIGGEST, understanding you need to know.

When you leave you are not going to feel better because you have left. Maybe you will – but it’s extremely rare.

The reason being is that you have been cellularly trauma bonded and peptide addicted to the narcissist.

Once your ‘drug dealer’ of these terrible peptides is gone, your body will start screaming out for them. Also, when you are stuck in the survival battles with the narcissist, your attention is diverted from the horrible cellular addiction that your body is hooked on.

It is only when the silence comes that your peptide addiction can hit with full force.

This aftershock can be WORSE than the feelings you had IN the relationship.

You can feel an insane compulsion, powerful addictive pulls and even like you will DIE without this person.

Also, this is a time when people feel like it’s love – ‘I must love this person to feel this terrible without them’. But please know that is NOT the truth.

Maybe you have had many failed attempts at staying away and keep going back (as I did too). This is often the case until you start healing the peptide addiction and breaking free from it.

If it has been AWFUL for you to try and survive, feeling like you can’t COPE and are DYING without this person, then the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program (NARP) is the most powerful and fastest solution I know of to help you address this.

And if you haven’t yet left, NARP is the BEST way to start preparing for the Aftershock when you do leave – because aftershock is the #1 thing that can derail you, more than anything.

 

Number 2 The Narcissist Has No Care For Your Future

You really need to know that the narcissist is not going to make your job of ‘moving on’ easy. He or she will want to punish you and make you suffer. As far as the narcissist is concerned, you were the one who did the wrongdoing and he or she is the victim.

If you are walking away, you are the enemy and this means you need to be brought down, demeaned, smeared and desecrated, as much as possible.

So many people, myself included, were astounded at how this person can become the greatest enemy you have ever been up against.

The relentless belting may be so terrible that it feels like you will break – or that you have to go back to the narcissist to stop it. You may even feel like you will never survive it.

You need to know that all hell could and probably will break loose and that you will not be able to predict what is to come and how it will manifest. Therefore you need to be calm, cool and rational.

When I left narcissist number one, I was totally unprepared. I had no idea what I was up against and that I should have prepared first.

If you start getting triggered, panicked and distressed, the narcissist will have you exactly where he or she wants you and will keep firing missiles at you.

The more you try to get decency, clemency, and care from this person, the more they know you are affected and the harder they will ramp up the abuse. The more you engage with them, the worse it will get.

Don’t, under any circumstances, try to bargain and create deals or get understanding.

You must remember this – as soon as it starts. Detach, don’t engage, keep healing and do WHATEVER it takes with your healing to be calm, clear and succinct – NO matter what is thrown at you. And if you DO all this, you will see how the narcissist loses all power to annihilate you.

In fact, he or she will lose all power to have ANY effect on you.

 

Number 3 Plan Your Escape

Know thy enemy and be smart.

This is essential.

Don’t tell the narcissist that you are leaving. Set up bank accounts. See your solicitor. Don’t tell anyone who may tell the narcissist your plans. Have somewhere to go and get your possessions out of the home, before the narcissist knows what you are doing.

Do not leave anything behind that the narcissist can hold onto, to hook you back with.

Make sure that all credit cards, or finances that could be taken from you, are disconnected. Please know that whatever you can’t disconnect will make you vulnerable and a potential target of the narcissist’s wrath.

If you are frightened for your safety, calmly and intelligently express this to the authorities and get ready to act with an intervention order in the event of threats.

 

Number 4 Go No or Modified Contact

You don’t have to tell the narcissist you are leaving – and as I just expressed, it is better that you don’t.

Actions speak louder than words.

Once out, it’s time to block the narcissist. Don’t take contact from him or her. If you have businesses or children together, get the ball moving with setting up a parenting plan and third-party channels of communication.

Detaching and healing is VITAL now, and continued contact will not allow you to do that. Make sure the people around you know that you will not be in contact with this person, other than through other channels and that you need them to respect this.

 

Number 5 Don’t Want or Look Out for Accountability or Change

When I finally got away and stayed away from my two narcissistic experiences, not wanting and looking out for accountability helped so much.  I NO longer believed there was ANY hope of change.

When you have been dealing with someone who is capable of what narcissists are – pathological lying, deflection, nil accountability, malicious acts and horrifically abusive situations – remember that these people have crossed the line.

They are damaged goods. They can’t and won’t heal. It’s just not going to happen.

You need to REALLY mean No Contact – which means I am no longer hanging out for you to tell me you love me; that you are going to fix this; that you will change and we can get back together.

NO! Those days are gone – no matter what you say, what crocodile tears you put on or what promises you make!

You need to face facts. How many times has that happened already and you’ve ended up in exactly the same horrific place?

Shut the door and MEAN it!

Of course, you are going to have feelings and urges to return. Of course, the feelings of broken dreams and dismay come up. But NOW your resolution is between you and you. If you take this to the NARP Modules, those feelings will pass very quickly, and you will emerge strong and no longer susceptible to going back or accepting a hoover attempt.

 

Number 6 Detach From The Smearing

A narcissist will do their best to dismantle your support forces and discredit you to the main people in your life. This will be your family, friends, colleagues, boss and maybe even the authorities.

The smearing may be so vicious, that you start getting abused by proxy by people enlisted by the narcissist. It might even be the police or other agencies, that the narcissist has arranged to investigate you.

There is a golden rule with this – let go of the fear of what other people think of you and heal this terrible trauma within yourself. I can’t emphasise this enough, because being persecuted is one of the most terrible human fears that we can feel.

I got slammed with this. Many of us have.

I was so traumatised by the smearing, that I thought that I was going to die. It wasn’t until I released all of the trauma inside, that I was able to deal calmly and succinctly with the authorities, and I was no longer affected by what family, friends and colleagues thought.

The smear campaigns fell over.

Previously when I was triggered, it just got worse and worse. The more I tried to prove my innocence, the less credible I appeared.

When I let go of trying to fight back and just worked on myself, the whole thing dissolved away. I promise you, with all of my heart, that the same will happen for you.

 

Number 7 Value Your Soul Above All Else

Over the last ten plus years, I have been deeply connected with thousands of people’s recovery after leaving a narcissist, and I want to finish with this message.

Value your Soul; your Inner Self.

Deeply learn to come home to you and make ‘you healing you’ your greatest priority.

Are you prepared to put your soul’s worth in front of bricks and mortar?

Are you prepared to be an example of ‘not succumbing and tolerating abuse’, rather than staying with the narcissist, so that your children don’t have a broken family?

Are emotional feelings and soul truths your priority now? Or are you staying because you think you should ‘have’ certain things – at a horrible soul expense?

Are you going to stay because of your fears, limitations or insecurities? Or are you going to commit to growing and developing yourself to be the source of love and approval and security and survival you need to be non-reliant on the narcissist and go forth and create your True Life for yourself? Do you want to be a positive and true example to those you love?

I want you to know that there is an infallible Universal Law that goes like this – when you honour you, life will honour you – with more abundance love and joy than you could imagine.

 

Phenomenal Support

For those of you needing to leave, or struggling to leave, I SO hope that this Thriver TV Episode has helped you.

I want you to know, with all of my heart, that you don’t need to do this alone. Myself and many other Thrivers had to go through it – obscene trauma, battles, aftershock and fallout with narcissists – and we are here for you.

We know how to get through this, and we know the best way to successfully leave and then resurrect your life, as well as rendering narcissists powerless against you.

Many people in our community are getting through this process EXTREMELY successfully and PAINLESSLY. Winning custody and settlements, and even having narcissists fully capitulate to give them what they want.

They do this because they are diligently working with NARP, their Inner Being powerful weapon, and they are in the NARP Member’s Forum, where the best minds in the work in abuse recovery are there to help you with unlimited 24/7 access – so any time that you are in need.

This all comes for free as a part of your NARP Gold Membership.

Also, please know I sponsor 10% of all NARP Programs to people in financial distress, because I don’t want anyone in need, who can’t afford NARP, to go without.

Mind you NARP is so affordable, it only costs the price of 2–3 counselling sessions. Also, it has a full money-back guarantee.

But if you can’t afford this, then you can apply for sponsorship with my support team at support@melanietoniaevans.com. If you are accepted, it means that you can start NARP and have all of its support structures at NO cost

Okay, so in closing, I really want to say this to you…

In the ten years plus that I have been doing narcissistic abuse Thriver Recovery work, I promise you there is a night-and-day difference between the people who don’t work with NARP and those who do. In fact, so different it seems like you are living in a different universe, and this is why I always bang on about NARP. It is my strongest suggestions for you.

It saves souls and lives and will grant you the most incredible life you could imagine on the other side. It is your solution, that you’ve been searching for.

So check out NARP and get all the right help, by clicking the link at the top right of this video.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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Is Your Friend A Narcissist? 5 Ways To Know

Is Your Friend A Narcissist? 5 Ways To Know

 

Do you have a friend who leaves you feeling drained, uncared for and even EXPLOITED?

Is the relationship one-sided, with you holding the SHORT end of the stick?

Maybe this person is just selfish and needs a talking to – where you are honest about what is going on for you, and what you really need to have a healthy and happy friendship with them.

Maybe you are too scared to do this or you don’t know how to start the conversation (or even want to have it).

Maybe you know deep inside that talking with them will never work, and would only make matters worse – because this friend is a NARCISSIST.

How can you know? In today’s Thriver TV episode, I’ll help you know and HOW to deal with them.

 

 

Video Transcript

Over the years many of you have asked me, ‘Do you think my friend is a narcissist?’

Or maybe you wonder if some of your peers, or even your bestie, might be just a tad (or a lot) narcissistic.

I haven’t done this Thriver TV episode before, but I really think that it is now time to deeply investigate how to know whether or not your friend is a narcissist and what to do if he or she is.

Okay, before we get started, thank you everyone who has subscribed to my channel for supporting the Thriver Mission. And if you haven’t yet subscribed, I want to remind you to please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Okay, let’s dive in.

#1 Puts Other People Down

One of the sure-fire ways to know that your friend is a narcissist is when he or she trashes other people behind their backs.

We all know that talking about people, especially for us women, is usual. But there is a big difference between discussing people with empathy and awareness and simply being derogatory, accusatory and nasty.

Does your friend seldom have nice things to say about people? Are they lovely to people’s faces and really happy to get what they can from them, but then pull apart their character, relationships, work-life, or anything else they can dig their teeth into, as soon as these people are not there?

If you are really honest with yourself, do you sometimes think, ‘I wonder what you say about ME when my back is turned’?

Be aware that this person might gush all over people at times, but this is during the idolising stage – the period when the narcissist’s ‘subject’ is granting them copious amounts of narcissistic supply and is the next best thing since sliced bread. It only lasts for a short length of time.

And, yes, this could be you if the friendship is new. But give it time, sooner or later you will become the person who is no longer ‘wonderful’ and is, therefore ‘terrible’.

#2 Is Entitled and Exploitative

Narcissists push boundaries – period. They feel they are entitled and they like to take. This can be very confusing with a narcissistic friend, who makes out that they are super-generous.

It could be with their replies on Facebook, their offers of support and their supposed generosity, love and care for others. Yet, if this person is narcissistic, they will expect renumeration for their efforts. At the very least attention and recognition.

Yet usually there is more…

If the narcissistic friend is parasitical, then in return for their efforts they may wish favours for free. Your time and resources or lunches, coffee and drinks, at your expense.

How do we know when a narcissistic friend is playing this game? They sit back. They let you pay. They don’t initiate picking up a bill themselves. In their head, they believe they are entitled to whatever they can get because they have earned it from you.

They don’t thank you – they just expect. And they don’t discuss reciprocating.

I have found that high-character friends not only speak up, but usually will also fight you in their offering to grab a bill! They also insist on delivering what is gracious and fair in the future. They don’t EXPECT!

A narcissistic friend’s entitlement could extend to many aspects of your life, whereby they will help themselves without the filter of checking in and seeing if it is okay or not.

Asking permission, or returning favours, especially when there is no audience or narcissistic supply to achieve, is not a narcissistic friend’s deal.

Also, they generally want to make plans with you on their time and will not put themselves out when it’s not convenient for you. Yet they expect you to drop everything for them.

But where is this person when you really need their assistance?

#3 Drains the Hell Out of You

At first, when this friend came into your life, there was their ‘I’m so nice’-bombing or some sort of exciting mutual shenanigans (narcissists love drama!), as a reciprocation of energy.

But now things have settled in beyond that initial period, you have possibly discovered that spending time with this person exhausts you. You may even feel ‘slimed’ after being with or listening to them.

Meaning that they dump a whole heap of toxic energy on you and suck your good energy dry.

Does this person, every time you get together, tell you another story about their victimisation?

Is this a person who has no respect for, and may not even ask about what is going on in your life, making everything absolutely about them?

Every time you try to talk, do they interrupt, take over and leave you feeling like you have to fight for air-time?

Narcissism is an energetic physic phenomenon. Truly, these people are soul vampires. If you are hanging out with someone like this, then it is unhealthy for you.

#4 Doesn’t Want Your Advice

Naturally, when someone you care about is always having dramas, issues and battles with people and life, you want to help them. And just as much as you don’t want to see them going through this stuff, which is soooo self-imposed, you also don’t want to have to keep listening to the same ‘crapola’ over and over!

Therefore, it would be normal for you to intercept with some good, old-fashion solutions to the issues at hand.

Maybe, if you have already Gone Quantum, and you know that life works from the inside out, you are trying to get this person to go within and heal the part of themselves that keeps playing out the same painful beliefs and victimisations, again and again.

But your words go through one ear and out the other.

This person doesn’t listen, butts in, doesn’t get it, or simply tells you what you need to hear so you think they may do something about it – to shut you up, so that they can keep banging on about themselves.

Yet each time you talk with them, nothing has changed. It’s the same drama; you are being dumped on all over again; and this person has not given one ounce of credence to your advice, let alone their own personal development and growth.

So repeatedly you get the same stories, complete with the same toxic, in-repeat, energy sliming you.

#5 Gets Nasty When You Have Had Enough

This last bit is how you TRULY know if this friend in your life is a narcissist or not.

What do narcissists do when they are presented with a boundary?

They do EVERYTHING they can to get under it, around it or to blow it up, and if they can’t they attack the person laying it.

The following is how to set a REAL boundary with a narcissistic friend:

‘(Friends name), I now love me enough to desire healthy relationships. I haven’t been honest with you about some things in our friendship that haven’t been working for me. It affects me when you do (what they do), and I know that for our friendship to continue I need to receive (what it is that you need) from you. Are you willing to look at this and work in with me, so that we can have a healthier friendship together? Because I know I can’t continue unless we can.’

I promise you if this person is decent, cares about you and has the resources to be conscious – they will own it, be apologetic and work in with you. They will want to change.

They may even thank you for helping them see something that they didn’t realise they were doing.

If this person is a narcissist, however, stand back and watch the three-ring-circus come to town.

Excuses. Justifications. Denial. Accusations. Even ATTACKS on your character and person. This is all about trying to get you to take the boundary down, eat it and choke on it, apologise and spin back to being a compliant, workable energy supply again.

And when you refuse to…

He or she may just be so ‘called out’ that they will do the famous ‘Poof, I’m gone’ narcissistic dump-and-run act. Which means, ‘I’ll block you on social media before you get to do it to me, and I’ll start smearing the heck out of you to anyone who will listen!’

Which is all to do with saving their precious ego.

Or maybe for a while you will be hoovered with attempted guilting, threats, appealing to your compassion – whatever it is that the narcissist thinks could get you re-hooked.

NONE of it will be about taking 100 percent responsibility and lifting his or her game.

I nearly cried laughing with an ex-narcissist friend, who a year after the showdown messaged me with ‘I have decided to forgive you!’

Typical (and hilarious!) non-existent narcissistic ownership!

Up-Levelling Friendships

We truly are WHO we connect with.

And what and who we tolerate is the level that our life will run at.

I know for many of you it is really painful to have to say goodbye to a person, or maybe even lots of people because you know they are narcissistic.

Try setting the boundary, and really mean it when you do.

You will have to be prepared to lose it all to get it all – there is no other way.

And, whenever you do this, you will have to be healed enough inside to truly move beyond victimisation to know that you ARE creating your life by setting the values and the limits that you desire as your life.

Then, I promise you, for every door that closes, ten more beautiful ones will open – when you truly get and actualise this.

To finish, I want to do a big shout out to this Community that it is soooo NOT true that my Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program (NARP) is just for people healing from Intimate Partner relationships.

The healing in NARP is for any and every narcissistic person in our life, because it is all about us healing within us, and becoming what we need to be as the Creators of a clean, empowered and truly interpersonal healthy life.

Many NARP members are working the Program to heal ALL SORTS of narcissistic abuse. In fact any type of narcissist or toxic or difficult individual. They do not have to be diagnosed as narcissistic.

If you are ready to get your happy, healthy, loving life, then I’d love you to check out my Introductory Healing Offer which you can do by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always, I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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relationship with a narcissist

15 Rights You’ll Give Up In a Relationship With a Narcissist

relationship with a narcissist

 

The following is a list of basic rights that should always be present in any relationship, but are missing in a relationship with a narcissist.

What you will get in a relationship with a narcissist, however, is emotional abuse. That’s what narcissists do; they emotionally abuse others to get their needs met.

Victims of emotional abuse are unsure if their experience can be justifiably defined as emotional abuse. Simply put, emotional abuse can be defined as any kind of behavior that is meant to subjugate or control another person by using humiliation, fear, and verbal assaults.

It can be as obvious as constant criticism and verbal abuse or as subtle as manipulation, intimidations, and consistently being impossible to please. It works as a form of brainwashing, tearing away at a person’s levels of self-confidence, self-worth, their trust in their perceptions, and their general sense of self. It can be done through belittling, constant berating, or intimidation. Sometimes, it can be hidden and disguised as advice, teaching, or guidance.

If you have experienced emotional abuse from a narcissist, it is okay for you to feel like you deserve better. It’s also okay to not know what better is, or what you deserve.

The following list is not only rights you give up in a relationship with a narcissist, but they are also rights you’ll have when in a healthy relationship.

15 Rights You’ll Give Up in a Relationship With a Narcissist

1. The right to receive emotional support.

2. The right to make your own choices without fear of judgment or criticism.

3. The right to feel as though your partner has nothing but good intentions towards you.

4. The right to receive encouragement from your partner.

5. The right to not fear rage or any other form of angry outburst from your partner.

6. The right to not fear your partner blaming you or accusing you of things.

7. The right to be called only names that you approve of.

8. The right to have your own views and opinions, even if they differ from your partner’s.

9. The right to be asked to do things instead of ordered by your partner.

10. The right to not fear physical threats or emotional harm from your partner.

11. The right to receive concise answers that deliver clear information on any matter that is of any legitimate concern of yours.

12. The right to feel as though your personal experiences and the things that you feel are real and valid.

13. The right to feel heard by your partner and communicated with on a polite and equal level.

14. The right to resolve any conflicts and receive a genuine apology for jokes that hurt or offend you.

15. The right to feel as though your hobbies, interests, and work are respected.

It is common for those who’ve been in a relationship with a narcissist to have a warped view of what they deserve from a relationship. If you believe you deserve negative treatment, you’re more likely to find yourself in a position where you’ll end up in another emotionally abusive relationship.

The list above should cement, in your mind and heart what you are deserving of in a relationship. Your road to recovery from narcissistic abuse begins with how you feel about yourself.

Do you believe you are worthy of better treatment?

Do you believe you are worthy of value and respect?

Do you treat yourself kindly and desire the same from others?

If you answered yes to those questions, with the list above and the knowledge that you deserve better, you’re well on your road to recovery.

If those questions tripped you up, if you aren’t in a healthy place as far as self-esteem, I’ve gifted you a list of what you deserve, not only from yourself but a relationship partner. Now, take that list and go get to work on healing your damaged self-esteem.

The post 15 Rights You’ll Give Up In a Relationship With a Narcissist appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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Can A Narcissist Change In A New Relationship?

Can A Narcissist Change In A New Relationship?

 

Narcissists habitually move very quickly on to new partners. They seem SO loved up and happy with this new person!

Is it possible that your ex-narcissist can change and be different with someone else?  And what is it about, when your ex seems to LAST with another partner for years or even decades?

Is your prior partner CAPABLE of having a healthy and loving relationship with SOMEONE ELSE?

If these questions burn you up inside with the terror that perhaps another person is GETTING the man or woman that you wished you did… Please read this article.  I KNOW how much PEACE it will give you.

So many of you have asked, ‘Can a narcissist change in a new relationship?

I promise you this burning question used to be my own, too.

And understandably so, because when narcissists get into new relationships we believe they are totally loved up and everything is completely wonderful for them with the new partner.

But is this real?

Will the narcissist’s behaviour change and they become the wonderful partner who you missed out on?

In today’s article I am thrilled to be able to give you the REAL truths, in a way that can really help, about the question ‘Can a narcissist change In a new relationship?’

Let’s get started.

 

The Dichotomy of the Question ‘Can a Narcissist Change In a New Relationship?’

The answer to this question is both YES and NO.

The reason it is a YES is because narcissists can be distinctly ‘different’ from relationship to relationship.

The reason it is a NO is because happy, healthy, solid and durably loving relationships aren’t possible for a narcissist.

You will understand more about this soon!

 

Narcissists Being Completely Different With Different Partners

Let’s check out this example…

When Mandy joined the Thriver Community, I discovered she had married Sam three years prior and the poor lady had barely crawled away alive.

Sam, in his relationship with Mandy, was controlling, insecure and extremely jealous.

When Mandy went deeply inside to heal her trauma with Sam using the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program (NARP), she discovered many fractures from her childhood that were to do with her being controlled; having her boundaries violated; not being believed or trusted, and being continually questioned.

Growing up, Mandy had felt like she was constantly trying to prove her innocence, explain herself and reassure others in order to be awarded any freedom or rights.

When Sam, the narcissist, came into her life, he quickly worked out that she had been engulfed and distrusted, not just by her parents but also by other love partners. Knowing this, he professed he would trust her, give her space and never question her integrity.

Mandy thought she had finally hit the jackpot with Sam. She fell madly in love.

They got married within months, after a whirlwind romance, but before long the cracks appeared. Exactly what Sam had professed to be, became the exact opposite. He started hurting her with accusations, distrust and intense jealousy.

Mandy was devastated. At the time, she didn’t realise her original traumas were being ripped open yet again, with full ferocity. Mandy was trauma-bonded to Sam, fighting desperately not only for her sanity, but to get this ‘wonderful’ man, who had originally seemed to be the saviour of her traumas, back.

Of course, initially this was all deeply unconscious for Mandy. She just knew she was panicked and emotionally terrorised.

She felt like she would die, even after she did get away from him – which is how our big, unhealed traumas FEEL once activated by narcissists.

Holding ‘No Contact’ was originally very difficult for her, like it is for many of us when we still have trapped trauma within our subconscious programs.

Anyway, thank goodness Mandy started working with NARP. She found, released and healed herself from the exact traumas that needed healing, stayed away from Sam, and completely rebuilt her life.

Predictably, life her life was better than ever, and she never again was attracted to men like Sam. The men that she started to meet and date, were not love-bombing her and Mandy was VERY clear that any signs of possessiveness and control were not something that she would ever have in her life again. Mandy started a committed relationship with a beautiful man who DID genuinely allow her space and grant her trust.

Two years later a woman named Corrine contacted Mandy, telling her that she was Sam’s partner after Mandy and that she had recently been discarded by Sam.

Corrine shared with Mandy how he was detached from her in their relationship, was never home, played up on her, and even threw other women in her face.

Mandy was shocked that Corrine said this about Sam’s behaviour. She couldn’t understand how he had changed so much – from being so possessive with her, always monitoring her, to not being around or giving a crap about what Corrine was up to!

I told Mandy this was normal; that narcissists commonly behave completely differently with different people, and that Corrine’s wounds would have most likely been from an absent father, a man who probably played up on her mother and who was completely unavailable and disinterested in Corrine as well.

Mandy checked in with Corrine and this was the truth. Corrine told Mandy that Sam had initially appeared in Corrine’s life as attentive, granting her love and devotion, which was what she had desperately been craving for.

He had worked out EXACTLY what was necessary to hook her in.

Then, of course, over time, he started HURTING her with the exact wounds that he had said he would HEAL for her.

Narcissists do this with every relationship.

Narcissists are not real, solid people with their own energy and identity. They are whoever they need to be to get people to trust them enough to gain narcissistic supply from them. Identifying and then carefully granting the missing piece to someone, is the fastest and most sure-fire way for a narcissist to get their fix.

Then, when that person inevitably falls from grace as a result of not supplying enough A-grade narcissistic supply, the narcissists turns on them. They have worked out the weak spot to hit – their partner’s greatest unmet, unhealed wounds.

 

Why the New Relationship Seems SO Loved Up

Narcissists usually love-bomb their targets in new relationships.

They ‘seem’ to have the same interests, values and want the same lifestyle as you.

They will say and do what pleases you to make you fall in love with them and trust them. They appear as your soul-mate; the life-partner who you have always dreamed of. This is so that they can quickly get into your bed, body and life.

All the while, they are being this delightful person only so they can identify your inner wounds and appear to be your saviour.

Narcissists, like fishermen with not much bait, have to hook a fish for a meal quickly. Otherwise, they starve.

Narcissists can’t manufacture their own emotional energy. They have No Self on the inside, which means the energy they expend quickly requires a payoff. This is a precarious balancing act. Narcissists will go over and beyond to do all that it takes to get their next love partner hooked. Champagne, flowers, trips, exotic experiences and expensive effort are extremely seductive to new potential partners.

And it doesn’t stop there.

When a drug addict secures a drug – they often binge on it. And it’s no different for a narcissist. He or she can get totally carried away with the high, the drug – you supply them with. But what this is really is self-medication for an inner tormented reality that the narcissist (drug user) doesn’t want to face – their true feelings about themselves and their unresolved trauma.

For the narcissist, narcissistic supply is their escape from the inner annihilating feelings of being defective, empty and self-loathing.

New partners are an excellent source of heady and high narcissistic supply, and a narcissist initially milks it for all it is worth.

If a narcissist has secured you as their next target, then they will be telling themselves that you are the BEST thing since sliced bread. You will be idolised to the point of the ridiculous, and the narcissist will tell you gushingly, and everyone else too, how you are the best sex, the most attractive, the smartest, the most successful – whatever it is that the narcissist is getting off on.

Of course, you are going to fall off this lofty pedestal – get thrown off, actually. It’s only a matter of time. A narcissist’s False Self is NEVER appeased for long.

This happens to all new sources … eventually.

 

But WHY Have They Lasted So Long?

You may think, because a narcissist was, or is in a long-term relationship, that they must have been successful in the relationship and maybe they really loved or love this person.

Please know, as I know, how wrong this is!

I know of so many people in this community who had been with narcissists for up to thirty plus years and had a horrific time much of the time.

The length of a relationship is absolutely no indication of its success. In fact, many Thrivers have had to dig very deep to heal the long years of abuse and painful programming.

Generally, the ending was terrible in these longterm relationships.  Because of being discarded, often brutally, by the narcissist for new and fresher supply, or they became so sick, including serious illness and emotional and financial devastation, that they had to get out to save their lives.

That is nothing to be envious of.

And I know that if they had stayed in the relationship, their lifeforce would have continued to be sucked out of them.

Okay, enough about the narcissist and the ‘what’ and ‘why’ – let’s now take your power back by talking about what YOU can do.

I hope I can help inspire you by sharing with you what I NEEDED to do.

 

Your Necessary Focus and Healing

Most of us have been through the agonising feelings of being replaced and someone else getting the life we were having or thought we should have.

This used to be VERY big for me – just the thought of it threw me into a panic both before and after narcissistic abuse. I had to dig deep and really focus on healing the parts of me that were:

  • Stalking exes on social media to see who they would hook up with next.
  • Trying to dissect the new partners to see what they had that I didn’t.
  • Obsessing painfully, and even having nightmares, about new partners and the wonderful life they were having with ‘my man’.

‘Can a narcissist change in a new relationship?’ used to be such a loaded and distressing question for me.

I KNOW, how many times I previously hung onto bad relationships because of the utter TERROR of being replaced by someone else.

And yes, ‘being replaced’ happened to me.

The first time it did, I felt like I was going to DIE, the grief and trauma was so bad.

I had to go inside and FACE these fractures and HEAL them. (As well as the ones that had led me into narcissistic relationships in the first place!)

Like many women, I carried deep in my DNA the fractures of my female forebears. Fractures that were primarily based around: ‘Without a man, I can’t survive.’

Supporting these deep fractures was the fact that my mother and her female relatives had NEVER not been in a relationship. And it was the same for the females on my father’s side.

Every time a relationship had ended in my life, narcissistic or non-narcissistic, my terror of being alone or replaced was off the Richter scale – no matter how successful, financially sound and capable I was.

Thank god I healed from THIS!

When you heal your fear of being replaced and alone, as myself and other Thrivers have, you will know THIS following truth:

Your ex-narcissist’s new partner is doing a soul contract dance with the narcissist just as you did – to have their unconscious wounds become conscious so that they can heal them.

And you will deeply bless his or her journey with the ex-narcissist, and hope for their soul’s sake that they awaken – just as you have – to not only relief from trauma with that person, but also to no longer needing to play out your same unhealed patterns with other people in their future.

For you, the relief that this relationship is NOT WITH YOU any more is indescribable! And you can become INCREDIBLY grateful that finally you can go inside, heal what has been limiting you and generating terrible trauma in relationships (just as Mandy did in our example today) and get free into a whole new Love Code that is healthy and happy for you.

Are you ready to heal and get out of the agony of being replaced?

It’s wonderful on this side, let me tell you! I and SO many Thrivers are here, and we want nothing less for YOU than to help you get here too!

If you are ready to heal, please sign up to my free Course where you will learn how to release yourself from the agony and how to attract and sustain relationships that are filled with love, truth and honesty instead.

And as always, I look forward to answering your comments and questions below.

 

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The Thriver’s Guide To Co-Parenting With A Narcissist

The Thriver’s Guide To Co-Parenting With A Narcissist

 

Narcissists don’t co-operate with joint parenting, and co-parenting with one can seem IMPOSSIBLE.

They like to disagree with anything you suggest; refuse to turn up or stick to prior arrangements and mess with your children’s appointments, possessions and their heads!

Are you feeling POWERLESS to get this person to see sense and act decently for the sake of the children? Are you sick of watching your children get hurt, distressed, disappointed and even blatantly abused?

If so, then I offer you this complete guide to a different way to parent with a narcissist that offers real healing solutions.

 

 

Video Transcript

When it comes to co-parenting with narcissists, it really seems impossible because they are not cooperative.

When co-parenting with a narcissist, he or she will commonly use the children to trigger you, affect you, keep you bound up in court and custody battles, and mine narcissistic supply from you.

This is a common way that narcissists continue to abuse ex-partners.

What can help significantly is Parallel Parenting, because this can create space, healing and power for you. It keeps your children removed from their parents’ battles, and also helps you have enough healing and detachment to be the solid, powerful influence that your children need you to be.

Okay, before we get started, thank you everyone who has subscribed to my channel for supporting the Thriver Mission. And if you haven’t yet subscribed, I want to remind you to please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Now, let’s dive in.

 

What Is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel Parenting is a co-parenting experience where the parents are disengaged from each other and have limited direct contact. Parallel parenting is about enforcing boundaries and then holding them.

Parallel parenting means that you have separate parenting experiences. At first it can seem really counter-intuitive to do this, yet I promise you that this is the healthiest thing for your children.

One of the ways that continued contact between you and your narcissistic ex damages your children – even more than you could possibly imagine – is if they see you traumatised, feeling powerless, acquiescing and handing away yourself, rights and boundaries.

This sets up your children’s template to be abused or abusive when they get older. It’s what they will likely work from because it forms the foundations of their inner, learned Love Code.

The narcissist can also line you up by triggering you to then turn your children against you – by making you out as the ‘bad’ one.

Naturally, it can be very confronting for you to adopt that level of detachment, especially when the narcissist has your children.

Most definitely we would love to have input into our children’s wellbeing when they are with the narcissist. But the narcissist knows this, and it becomes one of the greatest hooks he or she will use to abuse you and potentially your children.

 

Doing What is Instinctively Natural DOESN’T Work.

Monitoring, lecturing and prescribing to a narcissist does not make them better parents. In fact, it energises them to act up against you and the children, and to use whatever it takes to keep triggering and punishing you.

This doesn’t just result in the children being disappointed, let down, neglected or abused. It also means that you become more traumatised and distraught, which then affects your ability to be a solid, stable, calm and peaceful influence for your children.

So, above all else, you want to take this power away from the narcissist. The more victimised, brutalised and resenting of the narcissist and the situation you feel, when trying to co-parent, the more painful the feeling of being victimised, brutalised and resentful will be, and the more you will co-generate, with the narcissist, these experiences.

Narcissists are a spiritual soul mirror of the most ferocious magnitude. Simply feeling traumatised by them, even without contact, feeds these people the physic energy to keep doing what they are doing.

I know it’s tough; I know it’s horrific.

My heart goes out to you in spades, because I don’t think there is anything more traumatising and serious than when our children are affected.

To survive this and then Thrive for you and your children, regardless of the narcissist co-parent, means that you need to find another way to deal with the situation – a way that works.

You need true solutions for you and your children, and now I’m going to give them to you in four significant steps.

 

Step Number 1 – Acceptance

To get started on the healthiest track for you and your children, it’s vital to accept that this co-parenting experience is happening; that you are not dealing with a reasonable person; and that the normal rules of engagement don’t apply.

Stop expecting this person to do the right thing, comply or make co-parenting harmonious. Let go of that requirement, and all your triggered trauma regarding it, and start focusing on your Being and generating what you CAN to make the best of the situation.

Know that you are in for the long haul, and accept this too. If you keep mired in the victimised feelings of the situation, not only is it going to be hard to emerge from it victorious, it is also going to be deeply detrimental to your children.

The greatest gift we can ever grant our children, is the knowing that life can deal lemons and that we DO have the resources and the way to make lemonade – regardless of how awful it is.

Passing on our victimisation to our children, means they too will remain trauma ridden and will continue the cycles of abuse/abused in their life and their future generation’s lives. The cycle will continue with them attaching themselves to people who make them feel victimised, let down and abused.

I promise you it is NOT true that both us and our children can’t heal when co-parenting is involved.

There are more people in this community having parallel parenting healthy experiences with narcissists than you could imagine. This isn’t some fluke – it’s because they have accepted their situation, rolled up their sleeves and worked very hard at their Beingness and putting in place what is necessary to achieve this.

What else is there to do?

 

Step Number 2 – Emotional Healing and Detachment

What it is that feeds the narcissist the energy needed to keep hurting you, are your emotional triggers.

Triggers that if left unattended inside you, above all else, will derail you. There are no bigger terrors, I believe, than the ones attached to our children being hurt, or the fears of losing them. And I know this is some of the most difficult inner work you can ever do.

Yet, no matter how counter-intuitive it is and hard it is to do, if you release these traumas you will emerge from them powerful and solid. You will absolutely be able to take action in powerful, clear ways without being derailed by your inner triggered trauma.

Then, in everyday shenanigans with a narcissist, you’ll know when a certain message does not require a response, whereas before it might have sent you into a spin.

You will be able to have boundaries, hold them and enforce them without fear.

And you will be able to gently, lovingly and solidly respond to your children, in ways that empower them rather than make them drown in deeper victimisation.

This STEP is completely foundational, essential and is truly the difference between struggling with co-parenting and achieving parallel-parenting that works. I can’t emphasis this enough!

If you try parallel parenting, whilst still feeling non-acceptance of the situation, triggered and victimised, you won’t be able to create solidness and safety. This is because the entire time the narcissist is still receiving the psychic energy from you to keep going after you for narcissistic supply.

Also, you will discover that the right people, assistance, answers, and breakthroughs DON’T come if there are unreleased traumas still screaming inside you.

What comes instead, is Life generating within you, to the letter, more of your already existing traumatised inner programmed beliefs about your situation.

My Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program (NARP) helps you release the trauma of co-parenting with a narcissist. It is the tool, these people who successfully parallel parent, use.

Over the years, I have had parents tell me that they don’t have time to NARP, because of the kids and the battles with the narcissist. But, truly, this is when we need to be doing this inner work the most. It is the only way I know of to start getting off the trauma hamster wheel with a co-parenting narcissistic ex.

 

Step Number 3 – Create Boundaries and Accountability

The key to successful parallel parenting is to legally create a strict Parenting Plan that contains as much detail in it that you feel necessary.

The Parenting Plan is about parenting separately. It means you don’t do children’s birthdays together. You have your own designated times for school and sporting events. You don’t have contact when dropping off or picking up the children. And it also means your ex can’t just turn up at your house at any time.

It’s vital to put a lot of thought into the Parenting Plan so that there are no grey areas and all contact – other than third party channels – is eliminated.

Also, you need to include a third-party communication hub such as Our Family Wizard (OFW). OFW is a favoured parallel-parenting communication tool in the Thriver Community.

Once set up, this portal is the only way you and the narcissist communicate. All communication is recorded, can’t be erased, and is admissible in court.

If the narcissist changes the plan for the parenting access or doesn’t even make contact – it is recorded. There is no need for you to, react, fix or mop up the pieces – and it is most important that you don’t!

Your boundaries – coupled with working hard with NARP on any triggers that go off within you – means that you can answer any request that comes through OFW as, ‘This is what I am prepared to do and this is what I am not prepared to do.’ Do not comply to the narcissist’s demands and changes. Stick to your agreed Parenting Plan.

Then just record, date and collate every incidence. Stay calm, keep shifting out what arises, and DON’T bite back.

The golden rule of using OFW is this: ‘Anything personal or abusive or accusatory, I remove myself from it and don’t reply to it – period. Any changes to the plan, I don’t comply to.’

See your solicitor to enforce necessary boundaries. Don’t try to bargain, reason with or get the narcissist to understand – that feeds them exactly the attention they are trying to get from you.

Again, every step of the way, keep shifting out any fear or pain that is triggered off within you with NARP.

When you use the portal correctly, keep releasing inner triggers, and don’t respond, the narcissist gets no payoff. He or she can’t extract narcissistic supply, and what they are trying to do gets completely exposed.

The narcissist will despise getting nothing from you. And if you are in court, give them nothing either. Don’t look at the narcissist or his or her solicitor, and only speak directly to the judge.

Then, when finally you have become emotionally disinterested in reacting to the narcissist’s games, and are simply dealing in your empowered, inwardly calm and solid way – everything shifts.

Many narcissists truly stop their ridiculous behaviour at this point. And I’ve even seen countless narcissists capitulate and give people exactly what they asked for regarding custody and settlements.

There is nothing more disconcerting for a narcissist than trying to affect a person, who is no longer affected by them. Additionally, this empowerment and calmness often enrages narcissists, who then metaphorically hang themselves with huge outbursts of nastiness. A narcissist unravelling may be recorded on OFW or appear for all to see in a courtroom.

From your side, please don’t ever diagnose the narcissist as having a personality disorder. Don’t try to expose character, but rather calmly present factual evidence regarding their behaviour.

Many a Thriver has legally won against a narcissist, because of this happening. I promise you, the narcissist is nowhere near as powerful as you may think.

Step Number 4 – Become A Thriver For You and Your Child

I totally believe that all of us, including our children, have at soul level made no mistakes about the learning, healing and growing journeys that we go through.

I know how well my son and countless children of other Thrivers have fared in this Community, because of what we went through with them and because we led the way. Instead of staying victimised and telling our children how bad our life and their lives were because of being with narcissists – we do something completely different.

We keep shifting out trauma and becoming wiser, more real, solid and true, regardless of what happened to us, what we lost or what the narcissist continued to try to do.

Leading by example, we teach our children incredible healing and empowerment because of what happened to us.

As a result of working hard on our inner wounds, we can clean up all the internal barriers to being self-generative. We can start emerging healthier and more able to create security, lifeforce, joy and resources. We are able to release the hooks of dependency that make us hand our power away to abusers.

By doing so, we become more evolved parents, despite circumstances, than we have ever previously been.

When Zac, my son, and I did a Facebook live presentation together recently, he shared how previously he couldn’t stand being around me – my victim energy was so toxic. Because of not healing myself effectively, I was completely absent for him. It wasn’t until I knew my biggest mission for Zac was to get well – that he did as well. And thank goodness I realised, because I nearly once lost him to parent alienation and then again to a drug and alcohol addiction.

All of these things are now in the past – and we couldn’t be closer as Mother and Son.

Such a shift within us as parents means that when our children are dismayed by the narcissist’s poor, disappointing or hurtful behaviour, you can fully validate how hurtful this feels, but stop reinforcing their helplessness and victimisation. This will happen when you don’t rubbish the other parent but empower your children instead.

You can do this by teaching them their worth, boundaries and rights through your own calm, clear actions. Also, by expressing to them how much you love them, see them and believe in them, regardless of what anyone else is or isn’t doing (including the narcissistic parent).

I have found that so many Thriver’s children gravitate to the Thriver parent, detach more and more from the narcissistic one, and become wise and empowered beyond their years.

And I can’t tell you how many special children, who are connected to Thriver parents in this community, are doing their own internal, organic versions of Quanta Freedom Healing, as a result of living with their Thriver parent. Even young children.

Imagine being four years of age and letting go of internal trauma and filling up with Source Energy, as a result of living with a parent who does this! It is happening. We are leading the way for these little Quantum Beings!

As adults, these children, as the result of a healing and evolving parent leading the way, will not need to continue unconsciously being involved in abusive relationships in order to awaken to their healing and evolution back to themselves.

What an incredible gift to get this out of the way so young! Can you imagine if we could have? Can you understand how this sets up the future generations to be conscious, authentic and free from abuse?

I so hope this video has helped.

As I said before. It is completely my belief that if you are co-parenting you need all the support, power and inner shifting you can get – for you and your children.

I invite you to join me in my free webinar, where I will take you through a Quanta Freedom Healing to get you started.

You can do this by clicking this link.

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

As always I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.

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