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Dating a New Guy? 5 Signs It May Be Time To Abort Mission!

dating new guy

 

For a single mother, maneuvering through the world of dating can be a hazardous minefield.

When a woman is clear-minded about her wants and needs regarding a romantic partner, the mining process ensues. If you are seeking a long-term commitment, the following signs will help save you time and heartache.

As a single mother, an experienced dater, and an educated woman in the field of human science, I have identified the top red flags that require an immediate “Abort mission!”

Dating a New Guy? 5 Signs He Isn’t The Guy For You

1. A man who is unsure or not clear about his life preferences.  

As a woman seeking a long-term commitment and marriage, I have so much respect for the dude who openly admits to just wanting a casual hook up, this way I can immediately SWERVE!  The guy who “isn’t quite sure” what he is looking for in terms of a relationship or “still doesn’t know about the kid thing” is now completely and utterly unappealing to me. Here is sign #1.

When you know what you do want, you know what you don’t want. Say it with me, “Any man who does not know exactly what he wants in terms of his future romantic life is NO longer attractive to me and it is NOT my job to try and change his mind!”

Listen, mama, if you aren’t sure regarding your desires, by all means, jump in and have fun. The best of us were once there, too. No judgment! However, if you have precisely identified what you desire from life, love, and family and this potential suitor remains clueless, just respect his journey and wish him well. You deserve a man who knows. Keep it movin’, mama!

2. You cannot even briefly imagine the man as a future parent or role model for your children.

Hit. The. Brakes. You have reached sign #2. There is something to be said for a mama’s intuition. When your stomach gets tight over the idea of a man interacting with your children and you cannot even imagine said man stepping up to parent your kiddos, take a bow and bounce. The right connection should feel peaceful and secure. A man’s poor habits such as drinking and driving, ignoring his own physical health, or the absence of work-life balance are sufficient indications that send me running for the hills. Girl, grab my hand and come with, knees up!

3. He is critical and puts you down.

Can you say “Hello, ego?” Here’s the skinny; we are on our BEST behavior at the beginning of our dating endeavors. For the first few meetups, we generally worry about possible food stuck in between our chompers and we are cognizant about how we outwardly appear as we gradually reveal parts of our personalities and preferences. The man who demonstrates judgment, criticism, or disapproval of you or any part of your life this early on will only worsen this poor, controlling behavior over time.

If he name calls jokingly and you don’t like it, speak up. If this behavior continues, let me present sign #3. If he happens to see a photo of your family and begins commenting on someone’s current weight status, request that Uber ASAP. Call it quits and then give him the best view yet …that booty walking away! No comments necessary.

4. Your closest family and friends have not said one good thing about him.

We all have a selection of close family and friends whose opinions we value greatly. These people know our hearts, our desires, and preferences, therefore, they are also knowledgeable about what type of man would best fit into our life puzzle. When we first fall for someone, those pesky love hormones are raging in our bloodstream.

Even for the most intelligent women like us, it can be easy to miss those bright, red flags initially. Our tribe, however, is on point and clear-minded. They love us and only want the best for us and our children. After meeting your man, if the crowd falls completely silent, please acknowledge that as sign #4!

When you are big-time interested in a guy, do the faithful friend test. Plan a meetup and remain open to any and all feedback. My people always speak out on the positive traits of others when they see ‘em. When your crew has nada to say, step away and evaluate for yourself. If your folks haven’t outwardly identified one darn-good quality about this hot dog, graciously contemplate, “What could I be missing here? then remove your buns from his access and make him miss you!

5. He is not completely accepting of you, your past, flaws and all. 

If he begins making sly, sarcastic comments about the number of children you “should have had” or how you ought to have a more prestigious career and a bigger house with more bathrooms, this is sign number five! Our past stories, heartbreaks, and losses have beautifully created us to be exactly the women we are here and now. The right man for you will adore those battle wounds and war medals with appreciation and mother-lovin’ AWE for the way you love so hard today.

Any man who cannot accept and appreciate A) what you currently have (or don’t have) in the bank, B) what you are able to bring to table, and C) those cute, little humans that you are singlehandedly raising… well, he should not even be rewarded with a second glance. Just ask for the check and proceed to the EXIT sign.

Remember that every ending is a redirection or a light shining upon a new path, which will ultimately lead you closer towards your heart’s desire. One ultimate and final message: embrace your unfathomable worth, prioritize your own personal desires, have as much fun as you possibly can, and my absolute favorite phrase of advice from my heart to yours, “Keep Not Settling.”

The post Dating a New Guy? 5 Signs It May Be Time To Abort Mission! appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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Just in Time For Summer: The Freeze-Out Merger, A Legal Option Available to SOME Majority Owners of Privately-Held Texas Companies

Originally published by Winstead.

Just in Time For Summer: The Freeze-Out Merger, A Legal Option Available to SOME Majority Owners of Privately-Held Texas Companies 1

By Zack Callarman and Mark Johnson

Our previous posts have stressed the critical importance of buy-sell agreements for both majority owners and minority investors in private companies (Read here). For majority owners, securing a buy-sell agreement avoids the potential of becoming “stuck” in business with a difficult co-owner without the ability to force a buyout of this minority investor’s ownership stake. For at least some majority owners of private Texas companies, however, another option exists. This option is commonly known as a “freeze-out,” “cash out” or “squeeze-out” merger.

What is a Freeze-Out/Squeeze-Out Merger?

A freeze-out/squeeze-out merger is a merger of two or more business entities that results in one or more of the equity holders of one of the pre-merger entities being cashed out as a result of the merger (i.e., not allowed to own equity in the post-merger surviving company).

Mergers are governed by state corporate law, and most states have several similar, but separate, merger statutes for corporations, LLC’s and other forms of business entities recognized under state law that govern mergers of those entities under various different circumstances. In that regard, it is worth noting that a “freeze-out/squeeze-out” merger is not a distinct type of merger governed by its own separate statute, but rather is a “characterization” given to a merger reflective of the purpose behind the merger, irrespective of the specific merger statute under which the merger is effectuated.

The Requisite Authorization and Approval for a Freeze-Out/Squeeze-Out Merger

Under state corporate law, mergers typically must be authorized and approved by both the equity holders and the directors of each of the entities participating in the merger. In the case of corporations, that means that typically both the directors and the shareholders must authorize and approve the merger, whereas in the case of LLC’s that means that typically the members and the managers must authorize and approve the merger. The actual level of that approval (i.e., unanimous consent vs. 2/3rds consent vs. majority consent) is governed by the applicable state merger statute together with the operative provisions of the entity’s organizational documents. By way of example, under Texas law, unless the entity’s governing documents provide otherwise, (i) the affirmative vote of at least two-thirds of the outstanding voting shares is required to authorize and approve a merger of a corporation, and (ii) the affirmative vote of the holders of at least a majority of the outstanding voting membership interests is required to authorize and approve a merger of an LLC.

So, the gating question for any individual or group wanting to possibly effectuate a freeze-out/squeeze-out merger is: Do you have the requisite vote under applicable law and under the entity’s governing documents to authorize and approve the merger?

The Fair Market Value Presumption
It is important to remember that while a freeze-out/squeeze-out merger may well enable the “majority” to force one or more minority holders out of the company, a freeze-out/squeeze-out merger does not entitle the majority to steal, or cheat the minority holders out of, their equity interests. The minority members who are being frozen or squeezed out should receive fair value for their interests. Otherwise, the majority proponents of the freeze-out/squeeze-out merger will likely be vulnerable to claims by the minority interest holders for oppression, breach of fiduciary duties, etc.

In the case of corporations, the “fair market value” presumption is governed by statute. In many (but not all) mergers involving corporations, under state corporate law, the effected shareholders, including any minority shareholders who will be frozen or squeezed out as a result of the merger, have statutory “dissenter’s rights” or “appraisal rights”. In short, a shareholder with “dissenter’s rights” or “appraisal rights” who objects to the amount that he is going to receive in exchange for his equity interests as a result of the merger is entitled to go to court and appeal the valuation. The court then has the power to revise the amount that the shareholder will receive based on its determination of fair market value.

Curiously, LLC statutes do not typically include dissenter’s rights provisions. However, given (i) the well–established fair market value presumption that exists in the context of corporate mergers, together with (ii) the strong “fiduciary duties” overlay that exists under statutory and common law with respect to the duties and obligations of members of LLC’s with respect to their fellow members, prudence dictates that the majority proponents of a freeze-out/squeeze-out merger make every effort to honor the fair market value presumption in any freeze-out/squeeze-out merger they effectuate.

Logistics of a Freeze-Out/Squeeze-Out Merger
So, assuming that the majority proponents of a freeze-out/squeeze-out merger have the requisite vote under applicable law and under the entity’s governing documents to authorize and approve the merger, how do they do it? The answer to that question will again depend in part on the form of the entities involved, the governing corporate statutes, and the organizational documents of the entities involved, but with those qualifications, the answer is pretty simple: The majority proponents form a new entity with whatever ownership and capital structure they desire, and then they merge the existing entity (i.e., the entity in which the soon-to-be frozen or squeezed out equity holders hold an interest) into the new entity. Under the terms of the merger agreement, among other things, the new entity will be the surviving entity, and the equity interests of the frozen or squeezed out minority interest holders will be redeemed for cash in an amount equal to the fair market value of the redeemed equity interests.

Conclusion

The freeze-out merger is a legal avenue that may not be widely known by majority owners of private companies, but it is used with some regularity in Texas and is rarely disallowed by the governance documents of most companies. There should be a note of caution for majority owners in deploying this technique, however, because if dissenter’s rights apply and are exercised by the minority investors in response, the freeze-out merger may result in a time-consuming and a costly appraisal process.

Zack Callarman (Associate) and Mark Johnson (Shareholder) are members of Winstead’s Corporate, Securities/Mergers & Acquisitions Practice Group.

Curated by Texas Bar Today. Follow us on Twitter @texasbartoday.



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Attachment and the Psychoanalytic School of Psychology

What makes you think we have time?

I have a client.  A targeted parent father.  He so very much loved his daughter.  She’s nine.  Her mother created all sorts of barriers to the father’s love for his daughter.  Most recently was an effort by the mother to replace the father with her new boyfriend.

The father was set to actively fight for his love in court.  That’s why he contacted me, he wanted my help.  He has a very strong case. 

But then he had a massive stroke that left him paralyzed, conscious but not able to communicate.  It’s severe.  He’ll wind up dying eventually from this stroke and its aftermath, maybe six months, maybe a couple of years, but he’s not going to recover language or the ability to move.

What makes you think we have time?

My heart breaks for his daughter, the love of this dad’s life.  She will never know ever again, the kind words of love from her father, her father’s warm embrace.  Because the mental health people thought there was time, “She’s not ready” to be loved they said.  She needed time, they said.  There is no time.  Don’t they understand how this life thing works, time slips through our fingers, sand flowing away even as we try to hold onto the passing moments.

She had no time, and what little time that little girl had with her father was stolen from her by her mother’s pathology and the therapists’ ignorance.  Now, she will never be able to fix things with her father – ever.  She was robbed of that opportunity by the mental health people and their ignorance.

What makes them think we have time?  We don’t.

What really grieves me is the thought of this little girl at 18 and 25 and 35, for the rest of her life.  Her final memories of her beloved father will be of her cruelty and rejection toward him.  She’ll never have the chance to fix that.  She was robbed of that chance by the ignorance and incompetence of the mental health people who said we had time.  They were wrong. 

We have no time, only now.  We need to fix things now.  The father-daughter bond is too special.  A son’s bond to his mother, or a father and son, or a daughter’s bond to her mother, these are all too important to risk.  We need to fix them, restore love, now.  Not tomorrow, not some imaginary time when things are “ready” – ready to be loved?  How absurd.  Being loved, receiving the love of mom or dad is always a good thing.  Today, yesterday, now, whenever.  A child receiving a father’s love, a mother’s love, is always a good thing.

And we don’t have time.  Don’t you understand how this life thing works?  Children are only children once, and they have only one mother, and only one father.  The love of a father, the love of a mother is too important.  There is no time.  We need to fix things now.

We don’t have time to restore the parent-child bond.  What makes you think that the targeted parent won’t develop cancer, or have a stroke, or die in a car accident… tomorrow.  And then the child never has an opportunity for her father’s love – ever.

And her last memory of her beloved father will be of her cruelty and rejection of him.  A memory for the rest of her life.  Why did they do this to her? The mental health people.  Why did the mental health people do this to her, prevent her from loving her father and receiving her father’s love.  Now, she has lost the chance.  Forever.

It breaks my heart.  And makes me so furious at the ignorance and incompetence in forensic psychology that creates such widespread suffering, grief, and immense tragedy.   The mental health people that prevented this little girl’s bonding with her father are despicable for their ignorance and incompetence, and for what they did to this 9 year-old little girl, robbing her of her father’s love, and burdening her with a tragic final memory of her cruelty and rejection.

Understanding

We die.  We leave, so that our children can have their turn.

I’ll be leaving at some point.  Of course I will, you didn’t realize that?  You did, but you’re in denial just like those mental health people and the little girl.  They thought they had time.  A fixed and false belief that is maintained despite contrary evidence – a delusion.

It’s the way we cope with our fear and anxiety about our fragility, and our tremendous grief if we ever allowed ourselves to recognize how time will take from us all that we love and everything we hold dear.  Of course it will.  Didn’t you realize that?  Nobody is getting out of this alive.  And I wouldn’t want it any other way.  A world without children would be a terrible place to live.  Our children merit their turn on the rides, their turn at courage and struggle, victory and failure, and love.

I’ve had my 20s and my 30s.  It’s our children’s turn.

I’ll be leaving at some point.  I’ve already had two strokey things, I’m 64 and I never have taken very good care of myself – I’ve had my 20s and my 30s and my 40s, I’m okay.  And reality is real, time moves inexorably forward, for us all.

At 64, I figure I only have one more round of active work in me, if that.  By the time I’m 70 I’m going to be pretty toasty and ready to watch sunsets on my front porch with my whiskey and cigar.  You’re on your own.  And seeing the generation that’s arriving, they’re magnificent.  Your turn.

I’ll be headed over to Barcelona and the Pyrenees in September to scout possibly nesting for my final days in the Spanish Pyrenees.  My next phase is to write books.  I have four or five or six books in me.  There’s two more in the AB-PA series, Foundations was the first, but there’s still Diagnosis, and Treatment to come.  For the last two, Diagnosis and Treatment, I’m just waiting to pull the trigger on those because the time wasn’t right.  No point talking to people who aren’t listening.  I’ll wait til people are listening.

Then I’ll have another four or five books after that.  Writing in the Spanish Pyrenees with a home city of Barcelona… things could be worse.

But that means I’ll only be actively around for a bit more here.  If you want to make use of me, I’m here.  Otherwise, I’m headed off to write and watch sunsets. 

What makes you think we have time?  We don’t.

Understanding

That little girl misses her father.  She’s lost him.  Forever.  Because the ignorant mental health people thought they had time.  They didn’t.  They were just ignorant, and because of that, she going to suffer for the rest of her life.  Without escape.  They took that from her.

What makes you think we have time?  We need to fix things now.  Today.  Immediately.  Love is always a good thing for a child to receive.  Especially today.

Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist

 

 

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When Do You Know it’s Time to Call it Quits and File for Divorce?

When Do You Know it’s Time to Call it Quits and File for Divorce?

Like a rollercoaster, all marriages have their ups and downs. One minute you’re flying high with excitement, the next minute you’re wishing you never got on the ride. So, when is it time to call it quits and file for divorce?

The post When Do You Know it’s Time to Call it Quits and File for Divorce? appeared first on Divorce Magazine.

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5 signs it

You Deserve Better: 5 Signs It’s Time To Dump Him

5 signs it's time to dump him

 

Getting back into the dating game after a long time is an adventure. Winks and suggested matches on dating sites, endless swipes on Tinder, midnight sexting with that hot stud you exchanged phone numbers with who eventually ghosts you, a few awkward dates with men that you don’t have anything in common with.

After weeks and weeks of this back and forth game, you end up thinking “I just can’t be bothered” and settle down for a guy who seems to be ok: not too shabby in terms of his looks, smart enough to keep up with a conversation, maybe not exactly your type, but oh well. “You need to compromise”, – your friends say and you do your best. You overlook the things that are essential for you and put up with his ways while totally forgetting your own needs.

When somebody asks you “Are you happy with him?”, you just shrug your shoulder, “t could be worse I suppose”.

Stop!

You deserve better than that.

Here are 5 valid reasons it’s time to dump him.

He doesn’t show enough attention

The days when he texted you all day every day (that lasted for the first couple of weeks when you started dating) are long gone. Now he doesn’t text you much if at all, doesn’t reply to your text messages and there are no more cute emojis in his texts. You might think it’s not a big deal, but in fact, it signals a couple of things: it’s either he is not an attentive person and doesn’t see a need in putting an effort into a relationship and igniting the fire or worse – he has lost his interest in you.

When was the last time you received flowers from him? Does he treat you with any gifts every now and again or take you out on a date? Does he give you compliments? If it hardly ever happens and you find yourself in a boring couple’s routine, it is not a good place to be.

You are aware that a relationship is a two-way street and you try to put a spark into your relationship but he does nothing. You cook a nice dinner. He complains that there’s not enough salt in the food. You buy a new dress. He doesn’t even notice. You score tickets for an exclusive theatre performance. He says he’d rather go for a beer with his mates.

Let’s face it: he doesn’t appreciate your effort and takes you for granted. The paradox is that you try even harder hoping that it will eventually pay off. It won’t and he’ll end up sucking your energy like a leech.

Everything bugs him

No matter of your effort he is not happy with it and sometimes it seems there is no way you can please him. Every little thing that you do or you don’t do flares up in an argument. At first, you were trying to stand your ground and explain your position in a calm and logical way, but that only enraged him more. Being a rational woman as you are you decided to take a different approach and let go of those minor things.

Now you end up apologizing for everything and it encourages him to keep on pushing the limits and makes him feel that he is always right. His ego grew to the sky and he feels he can nag you about everything. Did you put his dirty towel in the laundry? “You should have asked me before doing that!”, he roars. Did you order a dessert after dinner? “You should watch out for those calories”, he snarls. He questions every choice of yours and wants you to be his mirror image – as perfect as he is.

The relationship with him feels like a battleground where he is ready to fight you in every single step. He is paranoid that you are fighting against him and somehow trying to harm him. All your good intentions are turned around and interpreted as bad and you don’t know anymore how you should act to avoid the collision. If you are trying to be yourself, you crash. If you are trying to be somebody who could please him, you crash again. Do you see a vicious circle here? Most likely you became a victim of a manipulative man and you put all your efforts to please him that will never happen anyway.

He wants to have his independence

Having a partner who likes the exact same things as you would be naive: you are a unique person and it’s natural that you have slightly different preferences. However, the gap between your lifestyle and your hobbies seems to be as big as The Grand Canyon. You enjoy going out for dinner,  while he always wants to stay in and order a takeaway.

You prefer a healthier lifestyle and he can’t live without his burgers and fries. Your ideal weekend is going on a road trip, while all that he wants to do is close the curtains, sit in the dark and play video games. When you try to find some compromises, he says his independence is very important to him and suggests you go and do your own thing.

You find yourself spending most of the weekends alone, going out only with your girlfriends and traveling solo. All the time that you spend together is when he pops over to yours for dinner and a sleepover before disappearing again in his man cave. When you mention the importance of quality time together, he gets back at you with the importance of his private space.

Living together is not even in the cards. While having separate homes can have advantages, eventually, you will start questioning yourself where this Living Apart Together relationship is taking you. The lack of intimacy and shared experiences is not a solid foundation to build your future as a couple.

He is emotionally unstable

You find yourself in this never-ending emotional turmoil as his mood is constantly fluctuating. One day he might be nice and affectionate (and that’s when you start thinking maybe your relationship is not that bad all in all) and the next day he is unhappy about the whole world. It might not necessarily be related to you, but his pessimism and bitterness unavoidably rub on you.

He likes to be in the center of attention and he expects you to support him when he is feeling down. However, when you have a bad day, instead of empathizing with you he gets frustrated himself and starts pointing out to you your weaknesses. Instead of giving you a hug and trying to make you feel better, all that you hear are his sarcastic remarks “You are such a cry baby” or “Come on, get your sh*t together”.  That’s totally not what you want to hear.

The worst part is that his mood swings are totally unpredictable. Anything can throw him out of balance and cause his fury: a bus that came 5 minutes late, a restaurant that was closed when you arrived or coffee that was served too hot.

Sometimes he even blames you for his own life choices or the consequences of them such as gaining some weight. When you subtly hint at him that you always suggest ordering a salad instead of fries in the restaurant, it infuriates him beyond words and he concludes that you should stop going to the restaurants altogether.

He controls your life

Even though his life seems far from perfect, he feels he has a right to say what you should or shouldn’t do with yours. While he’s been watching Youtube at work all day every day and that is the reason why he hasn’t advanced in his career, he nags you that you are wasting your potential with your corporate job, meanwhile, you’ve been promoted to a senior position recently. He is opinionated and he has high standards for everything apart from those of his own life.

When you have some ideas about the activities to engage in, be it a new business opportunity or a hobby, he is always skeptical and does not support you. He sees the negative side of things and he doesn’t believe you can succeed. The doubt creeps into your head and you get discouraged of pursuing your dreams and ambitions.

You feel like a puppet in his hands and every time you try to resist him pulling your strings, he still finds a way to do it. He might even make you believe that you are not worthy without him and he defines the whole purpose of your life. He criticizes you for the choice of your food, clothes or friends as well as for your suggestions or opinions on certain things. Your confidence slowly vanishes until it totally disappears.

No wonder you long for the days when you felt strong and independent, but the false sense of security while being with him holds you back from making a decision to cut off the ties. Loneliness is what scares you the most and the current connection seems like the only tangible thing that you have.

Don’t let yourself be lulled into inaction. Take a step aside to reflect it all. Book a weekend getaway with your best friend. Make a list of things you always wanted to do that you sacrificed for the current relationship. Create a vision board of your dream life. Is this relationship – a part of it? If the answer is no, take a leap. You deserve only the best things in life and you can have them.

The post You Deserve Better: 5 Signs It’s Time To Dump Him appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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It’s Time to Divorce Your Story and Move On

It’s Time to Divorce Your Story and Move On

Our life is a book and sometimes we lose control because of what we’ve been through. If you’ve lost control because of the end of your relationship, it’s time to divorce your story.

The post It’s Time to Divorce Your Story and Move On appeared first on Divorce Magazine.

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Do You Take The Time To Take Care Of Yourself?

Do You Take The Time To Take Care Of Yourself?

We’re so good at “taking care of business”. Day in and day out, we cross off the list of tasks that need to get done from our ever growing, “To Do List”, but how many of those important tasks or chores have to do with your own self-care?

More and more we busy ourselves, separating our mental and physical well-being from our emotional and spiritual selves. A lot of the time we’re going through the motions, barely aware of what we’re doing. But, here’s the crazy part, some part of us may find that there are definite advantages to being disconnected from our emotional and spiritual selves.

When you’re disconnected from your Spirit you get to justify inaction, hide and play safe. Sometimes you can even get sympathy by playing the victim and blaming someone or something else for your unhappiness. You may think that you’re nurturing yourself, but what it really comes down to is that you don’t have to do the hard work of self-actualization

Unfortunately, that separation can prove to be more harmful than you may think. First, it slowly erodes your self-esteem. Constantly putting yourself and your needs last send a clear message to others, the Universe, let alone yourself, that “I’m not important. I don’t matter.”

Sooner or later, you actually start believing that you’re not important enough to be on your own list. Then, on the few occasions when you do attempt to take care of yourself, you may be so guilt-ridden, you do even enjoy your greatly earned, much-needed break.

Subconsciously, you also teach those around you not to take your needs seriously. If you continually give the message that you’re okay with not having your needs met, you can’t really be surprised when that’s the way people respond to you.

Take The Time To Take Care Of Yourself:

Self-worth begins with valuing yourself- the echo that you are important starts from within and radiates outward.

In a recent Ph.D. study that I conducted, I learned that what often leads to the shock of betrayal had to do with that disconnect-there’s no blame or judgment here, just something I consistently saw in every one of my participants, including myself. The most common mental ailments experienced by people who were betrayed are disbelief and shock.

We’re so blindsided because we’re great at getting things done, often at the expense of checking in to see if we’re meeting our needs for love, intimacy, self-care, sleep, etc. When we stop paying attention or tuning into our needs, it’s harder to recognize those gentle nudges we may have intuitively been receiving but didn’t have the time or bandwidth to pay attention to.

Because we’re so deeply immersed in checking things off our to-do list, we’re often less aware of the emotional signals that may have given us a heads up about the dysfunction we’re shocked to discover.

Keeping a healthy mental/physical and emotional/spiritual balance can feel challenging. Being fearful of the truths you might uncover when you dig below the surface to learn that you may be bored with your job, unhappy in your relationship, or just want a little more out of life, is understandable.

Yet, that information may be just what you needed to make a change. Also, you might have the added pressure of “what now?” This creates a cascade of questions that’ll need answers and most likely, invite you to make some changes.

As scary as it may be, there are clear benefits to those changes which lead to greater self-care. First and foremost, you grow and learn. The confidence you build fuels your ability to move forward so that you can enjoy new experiences and fulfilling relationships.  More importantly, you feel good- mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually.

I’m often asked, “So how am I supposed to change my life?

Am I supposed to drop everything and just take care of me?” Change takes time- be patient with yourself. This is where I like to implement the “One More” rule. It’s a rule I created years ago that can drastically improve your life. The best part is, you can do it one small change at a time.

So, what would that look like, that one more simple act to honor yourself or your spirit? Would it be another moment to make a meaningful connection? Another moment to breathe in, write in your journal, or another minute laughing with a friend? Perhaps it’s introducing something new into your life like a healthy snack or a walk around the block.

We’ve been conditioned to overlook the importance of balancing our mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual needs, but doing so is crucial to our well-being. Taking the time to eat right, exercise, relieve stress, rest, and enjoy life can make all the difference in the world not only with our quality of life, but also in the richness of our relationships. It doesn’t mean avoiding your responsibilities and obligations, but rather finding a happy balance.

Do you take the time to take care of yourself? Are there any techniques that help you along? I’d love to hear about them.

The post Do You Take The Time To Take Care Of Yourself? appeared first on Divorced Moms.

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