You Can’t Heal What You’re Afraid To Feel
We have all been so disconnected from FEELING our FEELINGS that we innately believe we should do everything possible to turn away from and avoid them.
The messages we believe are ‘Don’t think about it’, ‘Do something to distract yourself from it’, ‘Think nice or grateful thoughts instead’.
Yet negative emotions, beliefs and unconscious programs are like housework. If unattended they simply pile up and get worse.
It’s my greatest desire that you escape the LIES you have been told about avoiding your emotions forever, and you come home to the ONLY way to Heal for Real.
Because the truth is … it is impossible to recover from trauma unless we feel our feelings.
Video Transcript
I understand the terror of our feelings.
They can feel TOO big.
We may believe the intensity of painful feelings will take us OUT.
We may have the fear that if we get mired in them, we will not be able to function.
Maybe you believe that healing is going to take forever and that you have to go slowly because you are feeling too much intensity.
And then there are all the unconscious ways we don’t want to ‘feel our feelings’.
Ways such as sneaky, pesky, egoic excuses that distract us from the inner work. Or we may stay busy or zone out with food, alcohol, TV and social media.
The ways that we can avoid emotions and self-medicate and self-abandon our Inner Being are endless.
Today I want to get right down to the essential truths that no-one really has been telling us – apart from people who now understand the truth about trauma recovery.
And this truth is… That it is impossible to recover from trauma unless you feel your feelings.
I want to take you through this step-by-step: why we must feel our feelings as well as how to do it safely, lovingly and powerfully – regardless of how much you have suffered and been through.
Okay, before we get started, thank you everyone who has subscribed to my channel and for supporting the Thriver Mission. And if you haven’t yet subscribed, I want to remind you to please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.
Now to begin…
Feeling Your Feelings Was Vital Even Before Abuse
I certainly didn’t know how important it was to be able to feel my feelings before my Thriver Recovery. In fact, I wasn’t even in my body, partnered with myself in any way. How was I to know this was not healthy when this was my ‘normal?’
I know it has been the same for many of you – living disassociated; not being housed emotionally in your body; looking outwards to life whilst being stuck in survival programs – rather than generating self-creation.
When we are attempting to live life from the outside in, trying to work out what everyone else is or isn’t being, so that we can somehow respond to that to survive – we are a reactor and victim of life.
Yet what we really need to be is a responder and creator of it.
Being a reactor to life equals ‘how to lose’ – every time.
Reacting to life means – ‘I will try to adapt me to become what is necessary to make you grant me what I need to feel safe, successful and loved.’
Responding to life means – ‘I will align with my values, truths and boundaries regarding what my desired life is, and you will either lean in and join me in this experience or leave and clear the way for someone who shares my values and truths and does.’
It’s vital to understand that living life powerfully and successfully, from the inside out, is NOT a logical thing.
You can’t generate this by trying to logically make it happen.
And the reason why you can’t, is because your logical brain only generates 5% of your life experience. What is really unfolding as your life, is from your emotional composition, beliefs and subconscious programs.
Which in short is HOW you FEEL about any topic in your life and the TRUTHS you have EMBODIED about them.
If you haven’t yet come home to your Inner Being to resolve, partner with and heal your emotional self, in regard to the painful topics in your life, including of course narcissistic abuse, then your emotional feelings, beliefs and subconscious programs will be unhealed. They will remain traumatised.
This almighty remaining 95% of your life then rules your thoughts. This is why the stinking thinking and obsessive thoughts that beat you up don’t stop, no matter how hard you try to stop them.
The resolution?
To be in your body, embodied in responding and creating your life effectively. To feel and heal your emotions.
There is no other way.
What Your Feelings Are Not
Because of our human obsession to avoid our painful feelings, at all costs, we innately believe we should do everything possible to turn away from and avoid them.
Yet negative emotions, beliefs and unconscious programs are like housework. If unattended they simply pile up and get worse.
This is why, as people age, the trauma, sickness and breakdowns increase and, generally for all of us as members of a narcissistic abuse community, the abusers and the incidents get worse and worse and worse.
The real question is – ‘How bad does it need to get before I do meet my Inner Being and start doing the necessary housework there?’
One of the common reasons why we seem so committed to self-abandoning is the belief that our inner, painful emotions are going to reveal terrible and horrible things about us. Things that we simply may not be able to face.
This is an illusion; it’s not the truth. It’s part of the lie that has been fed to us.
Your negative emotions are NOT who you really are.
They are not your True Coded Divine Self. They are false ideas and lies that were inflicted upon you by other people; people who had these inflicted on them.
Yes, the dense energy of them HURTS. But just as you don’t associate a cut on your leg as ‘I am unlovable, unworthy of love and not worth loving,’ because it is as yet unhealed and feels intensely painful, you should not do the same with any intensely painful feelings.
The truth, which is organically coded into every one of us, is that we are divine, adored and loved beyond measure by all of Creation, because we are Creation itself.
This is the Truth that we are all, in this incredible time, returning to – if you are prepared to wake up, challenge the lies and do the inner work to live free of them.
There is only one way out of the lies… You need to turn within, face and release the negative emotions, and the false beliefs connected to them, and go free of them. You need to know, believe and live within your soul right to FULLY be yourself.
What Your Feelings Really Are
Your feelings are no less or more than a signal showing you whether you are integrated on any particular topic in your life or if you have beliefs and traumas blocking you from your True Self and Life.
This is how the ecology of life works regarding your feelings.
What you want with all your heart – love, success, happiness and health – is what your superconscious (God/Source/Creation), which is all the Higher Part of YOU, wants for you too.
This force is benevolent and all-loving.
Whether or not you achieve alignment with this Force, depends on what is going on in your manufacturing powerhouse – your subconscious. When you are aligned on any topic, you feel good and the real-life results unfold beautifully. You experience wholeness.
Triggered traumas, delays, disappointments, and even catastrophes, show you how your inner subconscious beliefs are not what your heart desires and what your Superconscious Creator wants to bring to you.
So, what is your real job?
To attend to the subconscious programs.
How do you do that?
Be at one with your emotions. Accept and bless all of them as the God Signal letting you know ‘where you are at’ with everything and everyone.
If you get caught up in the story, analysis, research and regurgitation of our wounds – meaning staying mired in them – you are missing the point.
You are not supposed to be a student of your negative emotions, any more than you are supposed to study life continually rather than just set yourself FREE to start living it.
What you are supposed to do is find and then LET GO of what is not serving you.
This is the trauma – the emotional fractures, lies, false beliefs and wounds – that are NOT who you really are.
But you can’t do that unless you are determined to meet them and be with them.
If you take the talk therapy track; you hang on to your victimisation. If you identify with these traumas and negative emotions, you simply get stuck and snagged up in your emotions.
If you join groups of ‘survivors’ or ‘victims’, then your only hope is to try to manage the symptoms of the remaining trauma inside of you.
Every time you decide that your negative emotions are you, or a part of you and your life, you hang on to them.
However, you can come back to the Soul Truth, that these negative emotions are only internalised false energies and beliefs inflicted on you.
They are NOT you!
When we Go Quantum we know that there is NO reason to regurgitate or be in the story.
We know we have methods that work directly with the subconscious in ways that the subconscious responds. We can feel, hold, load up and release dense trauma energy, unlike cognitive talk therapy, research and information gathering, which use our logical brain and doesn’t connect to or communicate with our limbic and nervous systems where the trauma energy is trapped.
Once we start working with our negative emotions the Quantum Way, we know that no matter what the trauma is, no matter how big and who it came from, that this information is truly irrelevant.
Yes the traumas you experienced were awful and terrible for you, and their effects have been grave, disastrous and far-reaching in your life, BUT what is relevant now is getting whatever that trauma is ‘up and out’ of your Being.
When this happens, you can simply return to your Coded True Self – which is joy, love, success and health.
When you start living this way, I promise you will realise that simply being with trauma – feeling it, loading it up without getting taken out into the head story, and then fully releasing it and living free from it – profoundly works.
These shifts are somatically felt.
It is so much more than ‘trying to think differently’.
It is a profound process of letting the pain and fear go, and being filled with your superconscious Light and Truth that reactivates you without trauma.
The result is this: you don’t just start trying to force yourself to heal and change – you just ARE healed and changed on that topic.
You emerge knowing and being the wholeness that you were once struggling to grasp, let alone retain.
But, as mentioned before, this doesn’t happen until you are willing to feel WHAT you need to feel and release and replace, from deep within your emotional visceral Being.
Being Self-Partnered and Feeling Your Feelings is Your True Divinity
When you start living like this, you will understand how natural it is to be in your body, navigating life from ‘Who Am I REALLY in regard to this?’ rather than trying to work out who to be via everything and everyone else.
It is such a relief to manage and heal your own painful emotions when triggered, rather than handing away your power to False Sources (narcissists) to try to force them to help you.
It is so beautiful to be anchored into your values and truths, and not to be so precariously susceptible to people’s actions, decisions and opinions of you.
When you are self-partnered and have fully accepted all of your emotions as divine and meant to be –‘You are showing me what I am in alignment with and what I need to heal within me’ – then you will become incredible self-accepting, self-loving and self-generative.
You will start to become and experience the glory of what it is to be an actualised human being – living life to your fullest potential; consciously aligning and integrating your subconscious with your conscious heart desires and superconscious Creator Self.
This is what Going Quantum is all about – going inwards and feeling. It is not just the new Neuro and Quantum Model of True Healing, it is also the model of your True Life.
If you deeply get this, let me know by writing below – ‘I am going to Go Quantum NOW!’
Self-partnering is the FIRST essential step to do this – and is exactly what my Thriver Processes teaches. Coming home powerfully, safely and lovingly to yourself.
I ask you to join me in my free healing workshop: The 3 Keys To Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse.
You can do this by clicking the link.
And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.
As always I am greatly looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.
